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Terrified. Found a breast lump

NKS

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I’m scheduled to see the doc on Monday, which alone terrifies me, but I’m sure she will order diagnostic mammograms and u/s and then probably a biopsy. I had a late miscarriage in September after IVF, so I’m convinced that plus the hormones I was in gave me cancer. I’m a lot older too (hence the IVF), so prime age for BC. I am terrified. I didn’t feel it earlier in the week, and last night I did. I am paralyzed with fear I have cancer and will leave my kids motherless. I can’t understand how lumps aren’t cancer. It moves but isn’t squishy. Help. I didn’t sleep at all last night and the HA is red-lining. I keep adding up all the other “symptoms” I’ve felt since the m/c too (like these hot/cold nerve sensations along my rib cage, back and armpit area, and the swollen lymph nodes in that same armpit after my first covid vax in January, but they went away within a few days.) Please help. I feel sick.
 

suzzeeb

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I had the same thing years ago - actually my doctor found the lump. She circled it and sent me for a mammogram and ultrasound. I was petrified. It turned out to be a cyst, which I think the vast majority of breast lumps are. Seriously, the majority of breast lumps are benign. It's too soon to panic, although I get it, but just try not to get too far ahead of yourself just yet. I got a painful lymph node on my collar bone after my vaccine too, and my daughter gets swollen lymph nodes after the flu vaccine every year, so that has nothing to do with it. I think the fact that it moves also points to it being benign. I will be praying for you but try to remember that it is most likely nothing to be worried about.
 

NKS

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I had the same thing years ago - actually my doctor found the lump. She circled it and sent me for a mammogram and ultrasound. I was petrified. It turned out to be a cyst, which I think the vast majority of breast lumps are. Seriously, the majority of breast lumps are benign. It's too soon to panic, although I get it, but just try not to get too far ahead of yourself just yet. I got a painful lymph node on my collar bone after my vaccine too, and my daughter gets swollen lymph nodes after the flu vaccine every year, so that has nothing to do with it. I think the fact that it moves also points to it being benign. I will be praying for you but try to remember that it is most likely nothing to be worried about.
Thank you! I appreciate your words. I am doing so poorly right now. I already have myself thinking about where I’ll put the hospital bed in my house. I am a mess. I hope you are right and it’s benign. I keep adding things up in my head, scaring myself that it is cancer.
 

kammie72

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@NKS I know how you feel. But my dr told me 90% of things they think are cancer end up being benign. 90%. Lumps are so common. I’m going to pray you get some good news. I know you’re terrified but please believe you will be okay. Believe it. Do not let your mind jump to conclusions where you’re setting up hospice in your house! Please! I know it’s so hard. I’ve found lumps and ended up crying for hours in the dark because I felt alone and desperate. I gave the unknown so much power. I know things like BC seem so common and scary - they are but don’t make that your story without facts. Think positively! You’re not alone.
 

NKS

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@NKS I know how you feel. But my dr told me 90% of things they think are cancer end up being benign. 90%. Lumps are so common. I’m going to pray you get some good news. I know you’re terrified but please believe you will be okay. Believe it. Do not let your mind jump to conclusions where you’re setting up hospice in your house! Please! I know it’s so hard. I’ve found lumps and ended up crying for hours in the dark because I felt alone and desperate. I gave the unknown so much power. I know things like BC seem so common and scary - they are but don’t make that your story without facts. Think positively! You’re not alone.
Thank you! I needed to hear that. My therapist keeps saying I need to wait to get all the facts, but the reality of there being medical facts to be had vs just talking myself out of “my crazy fears” makes me feel this is so much more legit. I always expect breast lumps and so finding one seemed to validate my core beliefs. I appreciate your reassurance. This is a great message board. I’m constantly letting my fears overtake me.
 
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Same thing happened to me. When I was 34 years old I found a lump went to the OB/GYN and she referred me to get a mammogram. They did find the lump which was just a couple of benign cyst and I had to go back again for a check up mammogram in a month and that was it.
 

NKS

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Same thing happened to me. When I was 34 years old I found a lump went to the OB/GYN and she referred me to get a mammogram. They did find the lump which was just a couple of benign cyst and I had to go back again for a check up mammogram in a month and that was it.
Thanks. I hope it’s the same. I’m so much older than that so I fear I’m in more danger. Ug. It’s so hard having a “legit” concern while also dealing with HA. Impossible to try and see things clearly or even know what that looks like.


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Oh yeah. I get it. I had to wait two weeks for my mammogram appt. It was pure hell. I honestly didnt think i was going to make it.
 

NKS

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Oh yeah. I get it. I had to wait two weeks for my mammogram appt. It was pure hell. I honestly didnt think i was going to make it.
Did you have something suspicious? I feel the same—like I’m already one foot in the grave.


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NKS

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Update—had my doc and mammogram/ultrasound appointment this morning. Doc wasn’t worried at all and said we just need a mammo to see. But then she told me how it’s not biggie if it is cancer because treatments are incredible now. She made me a quick imaging appointment because of how anxious I was. At the imagine center, the mammogram tech was fantastic and so kind as I started bawling. She took an image and said “I’m not a doctor, but the fact it moves is a good thing.” So I felt better. The ultrasound tech wasn’t as nice, and she took a few pics of the bump and then my armpit, which freaked the hell out of me. She also ultrasounded all over the bottom quadrant where the bump is. She left to show them to the radiologist, and when she returned she said since my mammograms are so hard to read (so dense) and the ultrasound is not showing a cyst, they want a biopsy. So naturally I’m losing my mind. The order does say an ultrasound guided biopsy and “1 site.” So does that mean my lymph nodes are clear? Is this an expected protocol or am I screwed? I mean, I shouldn’t be surprised. It felt too rubbery to be a cyst and even my doc said unless it’s fluid-filled, they’ll biopsy it. But I am now about ready to shave my head and find my husband a new wife so my kids won’t be motherless for long.


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Ms.Honey

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Update—had my doc and mammogram/ultrasound appointment this morning. Doc wasn’t worried at all and said we just need a mammo to see. But then she told me how it’s not biggie if it is cancer because treatments are incredible now. She made me a quick imaging appointment because of how anxious I was. At the imagine center, the mammogram tech was fantastic and so kind as I started bawling. She took an image and said “I’m not a doctor, but the fact it moves is a good thing.” So I felt better. The ultrasound tech wasn’t as nice, and she took a few pics of the bump and then my armpit, which freaked the hell out of me. She also ultrasounded all over the bottom quadrant where the bump is. She left to show them to the radiologist, and when she returned she said since my mammograms are so hard to read (so dense) and the ultrasound is not showing a cyst, they want a biopsy. So naturally I’m losing my mind. The order does say an ultrasound guided biopsy and “1 site.” So does that mean my lymph nodes are clear? Is this an expected protocol or am I screwed? I mean, I shouldn’t be surprised. It felt too rubbery to be a cyst and even my doc said unless it’s fluid-filled, they’ll biopsy it. But I am now about ready to shave my head and find my husband a new wife so my kids won’t be motherless for long.


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This is incredibly common. I know SO many women who have had biopsies with benign results. Whatever happens, you will be ok!! ❤
 

kammie72

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This process is incredibly common! I went through this in January and was totally terrified. Yes, many many women end up with benign results after biopsy. MANY! When I had my biopsy the radiologist was like worst scare scenario we can fix this. And that was jumping to the worst conclusion! Somehow that made me feel better, that no matter what I could deal. And it was totally benign. Please please please stay positive! I’ll be thinking of you. You will be fine!! ❤❤❤
 

ali1b

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Hi everyone. I am in this hell. Mammogram scan and biopsy today. I know I will torture myself. 2-3 week wait. My consultant also said unlikely anything sinister but worse case scenario it can be treated. My anxiety won’t hear that at all. Dreading the night ahead.
 

NKS

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Hi everyone. I am in this hell. Mammogram scan and biopsy today. I know I will torture myself. 2-3 week wait. My consultant also said unlikely anything sinister but worse case scenario it can be treated. My anxiety won’t hear that at all. Dreading the night ahead.
I am right there with you. I had to break out a Xanax and Netflix just to stop internally screaming. I miss the times I would freak out over things that didn’t have legitimate roots. My doctor said the same thing—even if it is bad, treatments are amazing. But my anxiety didn’t want to hear that.


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ali1b

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I am right there with you. I had to break out a Xanax and Netflix just to stop internally screaming. I miss the times I would freak out over things that didn’t have legitimate roots. My doctor said the same thing—even if it is bad, treatments are amazing. But my anxiety didn’t want to hear that.


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I gave tablet next to me as I know I won’t sleep but will still torture myself about taking tablet.


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NKS

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This process is incredibly common! I went through this in January and was totally terrified. Yes, many many women end up with benign results after biopsy. MANY! When I had my biopsy the radiologist was like worst scare scenario we can fix this. And that was jumping to the worst conclusion! Somehow that made me feel better, that no matter what I could deal. And it was totally benign. Please please please stay positive! I’ll be thinking of you. You will be fine!!
I just found your old thread. It sounds like the same road. Your replies and advice are so comforting. Thank you! I hope this is all ok. So much is riding on me being healthy. SO much. The stakes are high, which makes this even more anxious. I keep flipping out that it has to be bad if they want a biopsy, but my BFF (a nurse) said that unless it’s 100% on the u/s and mammo, they’re not sending you away. I think it bugs me because I asked the tech “so it’s for sure not a cyst” and she was immediately “oh no, definitely not.” Or something like that. Freaked me out because I read into everything. She then said there are so many things that aren’t cysts. But doubt seeds were planted deeper.


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NKS

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I gave tablet next to me as I know I won’t sleep but will still torture myself about taking tablet.


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I took half to see how I would do. And they were expired too. I hate taking any kind of medication, but I kept these just in case. Hugs to you.


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