YashaSparrow
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- Jan 11, 2021
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Hello, My name is Jess and I am dating a person who experiences a lot of anxiety in many forms. There is a particular occurrence that has been complicated our relationship lately and I am really not sure what type of anxiety is causing it or how to speak to my partner about it.
Every time I ask my partner to do something they forgot to do for instance chores, or help/ teach them how to do something they don't know how to do they get upset with me. They have explained that they experience negative self-talk because they feel like they aren't good enough. The problem is no matter how calm, kind, and gentle I am they still get upset with me. I have been careful to avoid language such as bad, not enough, poorly, and use language such as not yet finished, to work on, while expressing my thanks and gratitude while they are doing the task or praise them while they are learning to do it. But nothing seems to be working and idk how to ask them to do things like wash their dishes or show them how to roll the cuffs on their pants? They cry just when I ask them to do their dishes or when I tried to teach them how to roll the cuffs on their pant leg? What do I do and how should I talk to them about these things? Is there a particular way I should be asking, or language I should not use? Are there boundaries I need to set or should I simply be supportive?
If anyone has experience with this I really need advice or resources if there is anywhere specifically that has good advice for these things.
Every time I ask my partner to do something they forgot to do for instance chores, or help/ teach them how to do something they don't know how to do they get upset with me. They have explained that they experience negative self-talk because they feel like they aren't good enough. The problem is no matter how calm, kind, and gentle I am they still get upset with me. I have been careful to avoid language such as bad, not enough, poorly, and use language such as not yet finished, to work on, while expressing my thanks and gratitude while they are doing the task or praise them while they are learning to do it. But nothing seems to be working and idk how to ask them to do things like wash their dishes or show them how to roll the cuffs on their pants? They cry just when I ask them to do their dishes or when I tried to teach them how to roll the cuffs on their pant leg? What do I do and how should I talk to them about these things? Is there a particular way I should be asking, or language I should not use? Are there boundaries I need to set or should I simply be supportive?
If anyone has experience with this I really need advice or resources if there is anywhere specifically that has good advice for these things.