FlipperK
Active Member
- Joined
- Nov 9, 2019
- Messages
- 228
- Reaction score
- 95
As I wait for my upcoming annual appointment, I have thought about dying soon due a fear of having cancer.
I looked at my family and kids and started to feel sad at first.
Then after a couple of days I realized something. Why am I afraid of dying? It’s going to happen sooner or later.
I am not afraid of dying at age 80, but I am at age 30. Why is that?
I realized, I am not particularly afraid of dying per se. I am afraid of running out of time.
We all have a limited amount of time here and we want to maximize it as much as possible. In the course of health anxiety, we stress so much about being ill and trying to live longer... we end up living a life that isn’t fulfilling.
In a matter of a few days really thinking I have a terminal illness, something clicked. It doesn’t matter if I do or not. The sun will rise tomorrow. My kids will wake up and want to play. My wife will do the same and go to work.
They will go on with their lives and what will I do?
My choice.
If I am dying, well, I am sure going to live what time I have left. Because in reality, we all only have so much time left. We will all succumb to death at one point.
How do those in their 80s live? They are near the end and yet they are happy every morning they wake up.
Another day, another sun rise, another deep breath of fresh air.
Each day is a blessing and I am starting to enjoy my life more. I am not nervous.
Release the control and you feel more free. Do what you have to do with doctors, tests, ect. But in the end, it won’t matter eventually.
And that’s okay.
I looked at my family and kids and started to feel sad at first.
Then after a couple of days I realized something. Why am I afraid of dying? It’s going to happen sooner or later.
I am not afraid of dying at age 80, but I am at age 30. Why is that?
I realized, I am not particularly afraid of dying per se. I am afraid of running out of time.
We all have a limited amount of time here and we want to maximize it as much as possible. In the course of health anxiety, we stress so much about being ill and trying to live longer... we end up living a life that isn’t fulfilling.
In a matter of a few days really thinking I have a terminal illness, something clicked. It doesn’t matter if I do or not. The sun will rise tomorrow. My kids will wake up and want to play. My wife will do the same and go to work.
They will go on with their lives and what will I do?
My choice.
If I am dying, well, I am sure going to live what time I have left. Because in reality, we all only have so much time left. We will all succumb to death at one point.
How do those in their 80s live? They are near the end and yet they are happy every morning they wake up.
Another day, another sun rise, another deep breath of fresh air.
Each day is a blessing and I am starting to enjoy my life more. I am not nervous.
Release the control and you feel more free. Do what you have to do with doctors, tests, ect. But in the end, it won’t matter eventually.
And that’s okay.
