Howlingvapor
Active Member
- Joined
- Feb 23, 2019
- Messages
- 143
- Reaction score
- 52
Umm I know it’s starting to sound like every other day I have something to post and it keeps getting worse. My girlfriend who I cared about very much left me this evening. She said we lost the spark, that she doesn’t love me anymore. She said I didn’t do anything wrong she’s just lost interest in me.
I honestly don’t know what to do now. I tried reasoning with her but she’s made up her mind. I’m gonna start going to therapy again cus I don’t think I can do this alone. My parents tried to comfort me when it happened. They heard me having a panic attack. They also heard me mumble about killing myself. I’m better now than I was, but I’m still very hurt. I honestly don’t know where to go from here. Everything was fine on moment and then it wasn’t. She said she’s been considering it for 3 weeks she says we’ve both been extremely busy and between everything that’s been going on she’s just fallen out of love with me. She says it’s her not me, but they all say that don’t they?
I guess I’m just really lost right now. I’m trying to distract myself so I don’t spend all night crying, but it’s really hard. A part of me wants to believe that tomorrow morning I’ll wake up and realize this was just a nightmare, but I know deep down it’s not.
I have a good support network to get me through this. I’m trying to avoid suicidal thoughts or actions because I don’t want to be put on suicide watch or whatever, but honestly with this pain I’m not gonna lie it’s tempting. I’m not gonna do it, every time I’ve gotten close to it before I change my mind at the last second. I just can’t do it, I don’t have the courage to.
The memories are the most painful part. Watching all my great memories with her become soiled. I really loved her, and I thought she loved me too and apparently she did for most of the relationship which is the one thing I can take comfort in. She didn’t cheat on me and according to her she’s not mad at me, she’s just done. I just don’t know how I’m going to transition to not having her in my life.
I don’t know why I’m saying any of this here or why I think any stranger on the internet would care, but honestly I don’t have many places to talk about this right now. I’m taking a mental health day Tomorrow, I’m gonna try to take things easy and try to cheer myself up a bit. I’m just hurting so much I never thought this would happen.
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I honestly don’t know what to do now. I tried reasoning with her but she’s made up her mind. I’m gonna start going to therapy again cus I don’t think I can do this alone. My parents tried to comfort me when it happened. They heard me having a panic attack. They also heard me mumble about killing myself. I’m better now than I was, but I’m still very hurt. I honestly don’t know where to go from here. Everything was fine on moment and then it wasn’t. She said she’s been considering it for 3 weeks she says we’ve both been extremely busy and between everything that’s been going on she’s just fallen out of love with me. She says it’s her not me, but they all say that don’t they?
I guess I’m just really lost right now. I’m trying to distract myself so I don’t spend all night crying, but it’s really hard. A part of me wants to believe that tomorrow morning I’ll wake up and realize this was just a nightmare, but I know deep down it’s not.
I have a good support network to get me through this. I’m trying to avoid suicidal thoughts or actions because I don’t want to be put on suicide watch or whatever, but honestly with this pain I’m not gonna lie it’s tempting. I’m not gonna do it, every time I’ve gotten close to it before I change my mind at the last second. I just can’t do it, I don’t have the courage to.
The memories are the most painful part. Watching all my great memories with her become soiled. I really loved her, and I thought she loved me too and apparently she did for most of the relationship which is the one thing I can take comfort in. She didn’t cheat on me and according to her she’s not mad at me, she’s just done. I just don’t know how I’m going to transition to not having her in my life.
I don’t know why I’m saying any of this here or why I think any stranger on the internet would care, but honestly I don’t have many places to talk about this right now. I’m taking a mental health day Tomorrow, I’m gonna try to take things easy and try to cheer myself up a bit. I’m just hurting so much I never thought this would happen.
Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk