Major panic health anxiety

[Sophiexoxo]

Health anxiety is kicking in, I just read on social media about a girl my age who I went to school with had passed away. She had a blood clot on her lungs. I’m so sad and it’s truly heartbreaking. So young as well and leaved little ones behind. My selfish brain is now fixating on the fact that “oh my god” what if I’ve got a blood clot, I’m worrying about the pain that I keep getting in my calf occasionally and my diziness that I’ve had for months. I’ve managed to selfishly convince myself I have a blood clot or I am going to get one and I will die. I don’t know what to do. I’m in full on panic mode and feel like I can’t breathe.

 

[Phillies Phan]

First, condolences for the loss of a former classmate. I’ve had this happen to me about 5 years ago. First, a close friend from my high school years passed away from pancreatic cancer. Then a year late a classmate from elementary school also died from the same disease. But, I eventually figured that these people were not me. Who knows what their lifestyle was as adults? Same for you. You are not her. You know nothing about her life after you left school.

In the end though, all we can do is to try to make the best choices in life. Avoid unnecessary risk taking, don’t smoke, try to keep the weight under control, exercise and the hardest one by far, try to keep a positive mindset. Beyond that, we have to accept that we have little control over what will happen to us in the future.

If you can’t get over the fear, see your doctor to calm you down. I did that after my friend passed away and he did an examination telling me I was ok. It helped but he understood the shock of losing someone and how easy it is for us to project that loss onto us.

 

[Sophiexoxo]

First, condolences for the loss of a former classmate. I’ve had this happen to me about 5 years ago. First, a close friend from my high school years passed away from pancreatic cancer. Then a year late a classmate from elementary school also died from the same disease. But, I eventually figured that these people were not me. Who knows what their lifestyle was as adults? Same for you. You are not her. You know nothing about her life after you left school.

In the end though, all we can do is to try to make the best choices in life. Avoid unnecessary risk taking, don’t smoke, try to keep the weight under control, exercise and the hardest one by far, try to keep a positive mindset. Beyond that, we have to accept that we have little control over what will happen to us in the future.

If you can’t get over the fear, see your doctor to calm you down. I did that after my friend passed away and he did an examination telling me I was ok. It helped but he understood the shock of losing someone and how easy it is for us to project that loss onto us.

Thank you for your reply Phillies Phan: unfortunately this is not new behaviour for me. I’ve always got these horrid intrusive thoughts that I’m dying imminently and I’ve always got these worries of what if this and what if that, as of late it’s taken over my life but each time I see, read or hear something my brain automatically goes into panic mode and I’m dead and buried before you know it, I’ve suffered for many years. Numerous visits to the doctor and therapies to no avail, I just can’t comprehend the fact that what if something happens to me and I won’t be here anymore. Each time I have these thoughts all logical thinking and reasoning goes out the window completely and I spend hours if not days if not weeks obsessing and not actually enjoying my life. Health anxiety and the fear of death consumes me every single day and every single day it does not get easier, it just gets worse and worse. I can’t function like a normal human anymore. I can’t be the wife, daughter or mother that I want to be anymore. I don’t know how to overcome this hell. I love the things I have in my life like my son and I think my fears and anxieties are amplified by the fact that I have children now and I can’t bare the thought of not being here for them and then growing up without me.

 

[JULIEMCLEAN89]

Hi Sophie, I can 100% relate to this, I too have lived with health anxiety since I was 16, some days are better than others but it has now taken over my life, I cannot enjoy anything, everyday I think there’s something wrong with me and end up in a constant state of panic, I’ve tried everything, medication, cbt, hypnotherapy, and still nothing stops it! Xxx

 

[Sweet T]

I can relate. Everything triggers me. But blood clots are rare and you don’t know what her story was before she passed. Maybe she had surgery or a leg injury. Maybe she had a blood clotting disorder. The likelihood of you having a clot is very low and if you did, you’d know it. They are very painful and hot. They don’t come and go. Can you write a list of 5 things you are grateful for and focus on those things today? Take care

 

[Sophiexoxo]

Hi Sophie, I can 100% relate to this, I too have lived with health anxiety since I was 16, some days are better than others but it has now taken over my life, I cannot enjoy anything, everyday I think there’s something wrong with me and end up in a constant state of panic, I’ve tried everything, medication, cbt, hypnotherapy, and still nothing stops it! Xxx

Thanks for your reply, I’m glad that you can relate, I just want to feel normal you know. I feel absolutely terrible all of the time. Always nauseas, always hungry for air, joint and body aches, extremely fatigued not to mention the staying constant anxiety. There must be a way to stop this hell xx

I can relate. Everything triggers me. But blood clots are rare and you don’t know what her story was before she passed. Maybe she had surgery or a leg injury. Maybe she had a blood clotting disorder. The likelihood of you having a clot is very low and if you did, you’d know it. They are very painful and hot. They don’t come and go. Can you write a list of 5 things you are grateful for and focus on those things today? Take care

Thank you for your reply, I’m become obsessed with the thought of blood clots or heart problems with o the point that my little finger hurts so I’ve scared myself into thinking there is a clot in my finger and what if it moves?
I can’t think of five things i am grateful for , only my beautiful little son and my partner but everything else in my life just seems dull.

 

[shay1988]

Hello and welcome! I know exactly where your coming from! I also suffer from health anxiety! I wake up every day just knowing somthing is going to happen to me I'm going to die soon and be no more! I have had two people I was close to die from blood clots in the brain, I think it's called aneurysm. And I freaked out about that for a while. But my heart is always! Beating so so fast and skipping beats and I freak out every day just knowing somthing is wrong with my heart and I'm going to die anytime soon! But I've been to Drs and the ER and they say I'm fine! But I don't feel fine! I also have children and a hubby. I have twins that are 8 years old and a 13 year old and a almost 16 year old. And I hate the thought of leaving them alone! But we can overcome this! It just will take time. I would love to talk more! I hope u find some peace soon! And again welcome!!!

 

[Sophiexoxo]

Hello and welcome! I know exactly where your coming from! I also suffer from health anxiety! I wake up every day just knowing somthing is going to happen to me I'm going to die soon and be no more! I have had two people I was close to die from blood clots in the brain, I think it's called aneurysm. And I freaked out about that for a while. But my heart is always! Beating so so fast and skipping beats and I freak out every day just knowing somthing is wrong with my heart and I'm going to die anytime soon! But I've been to Drs and the ER and they say I'm fine! But I don't feel fine! I also have children and a hubby. I have twins that are 8 years old and a 13 year old and a almost 16 year old. And I hate the thought of leaving them alone! But we can overcome this! It just will take time. I would love to talk more! I hope u find some peace soon! And again welcome!!!

When will we overcome this though, it’s horrible. Today I’ve convinced myself I have atrial fibrillation. My heart fears have been ongoing for some time now and I was just reading about it and I feel it’s confirmed my fears.

 

[Chase17]

I'm in the exact same situation right now. All of last winter and early this spring I was convinced I had throat cancer. I got the tests I needed and of course, I was fine. Most of the summer was pretty peaceful, but something kept nagging me in the back of my mind. I've been unemployed since February and every single job that I apply to or interview for sends a rejection note. This played with my head and gave me the feeling that maybe God or the universe was trying to tell me that something is still wrong. Today, I'm a few hours out from having a colonoscopy. I've convinced myself that I have anal cancer because of abuse I endured from a neighbor kid when I was a pre-teen. It's likely hemorrhoids, but my mind isn't letting me consider that. Only cancer. I just keep crying and trying to figure out how to apologize to my family for possibly making them go through something nobody should have to go through...especially not kids. I don't want to die, I want to be happy with my family, but the fear and dread are so much to bear.

 

[Phillies Phan]

I'm in the exact same situation right now. All of last winter and early this spring I was convinced I had throat cancer. I got the tests I needed and of course, I was fine. Most of the summer was pretty peaceful, but something kept nagging me in the back of my mind. I've been unemployed since February and every single job that I apply to or interview for sends a rejection note. This played with my head and gave me the feeling that maybe God or the universe was trying to tell me that something is still wrong. Today, I'm a few hours out from having a colonoscopy. I've convinced myself that I have anal cancer because of abuse I endured from a neighbor kid when I was a pre-teen. It's likely hemorrhoids, but my mind isn't letting me consider that. Only cancer. I just keep crying and trying to figure out how to apologize to my family for possibly making them go through something nobody should have to go through...especially not kids. I don't want to die, I want to be happy with my family, but the fear and dread are so much to bear.

Hi Chase,

By now you’ve been told you don’t have anal cancer. Thinking that the universe is trying to tell you something is called magical thinking. Rather, it’s normal with HA to go from one fear to another, especially when triggered. You had the colonoscopy coming up, and likely had a month or more to dwell on it and fantasize they’d find cancer. My doctor once used that term when I described how I connected the dots to where I was sure I had a blood clot.

Try to see if you can determine ways to improve the chances you get hired, like maybe improving your resume, go into the interview with a more positive and calmer attitude, etc.

 

[Chase17]

Hi Chase,

By now you’ve been told you don’t have anal cancer. Thinking that the universe is trying to tell you something is called magical thinking. Rather, it’s normal with HA to go from one fear to another, especially when triggered. You had the colonoscopy coming up, and likely had a month or more to dwell on it and fantasize they’d find cancer. My doctor once used that term when I described how I connected the dots to where I was sure I had a blood clot.

Try to see if you can determine ways to improve the chances you get hired, like maybe improving your resume, go into the interview with a more positive and calmer attitude, etc.

No cancer…no surprise. But, Crohn’s is highly likely. That was a curveball.

 

[shay1988]

I totally get it. I cry almost every day asking when am I going to get over this and will I ever find peace again. I was having bad anxiety when I first logged in here just now my heart is racing so fast. And I try to breath threw it but that don't work I try to talk myself down and that don't work. I'm just so lost. I really do hope that someday soon we can overpower this!

 

[Chase17]

I totally get it. I cry almost every day asking when am I going to get over this and will I ever find peace again. I was having bad anxiety when I first logged in here just now my heart is racing so fast. And I try to breath threw it but that don't work I try to talk myself down and that don't work. I'm just so lost. I really do hope that someday soon we can overpower this!

It’s as exhausting as it is terrifying. I’m so tired, yet I can’t fall asleep at night. I’m so scared and sad all the time. Breathing, talking, meds…nothing helps. I have a family, but I feel so alone. I’ve had medical tests that are (relatively) clear, but I still feel like I’m dying. I don’t know what to do.

 

[shay1988]

I feel the same way. They keep saying Im fine but I don't feel fine I feel like I'm dying all the time! They won't give me the meds I need to try and help me. It's hard to anything like that here. I guess cause there is so many people abusing them. I just wish something could help me

 

[Dalalak45]

Hi there,

so I only just made an account today, first time ever writing in a forum. I had this health anexiety start 2 years ago, it has progressively slowly got better but I think it's alway gonna be there. I'm a dad of 2 children and when I first started getting anexiety I kept thinking that there was something wrong with me. I would get really sudden panic attacks, face tingling sensations and shortness of breathe. I kept thinking when I was driving in a motorway that something would happen like I would pass out and crash, or when I take my children to busy places i would feel panicked that something might happen to me.

I always thought it was because I wasn't healthy enough. my weight is where I should be. I'm kind of active but not as much as some. I think where I work in furniture spraying I got worried and still do sometimes that I've got some long term effect of the dust/ fumes and I'll have cancer or will have a heart attack or something at any given moment. everytime I get a feeling slighlty out of the ordinary I think its something fatal. but the more I've had one of these intrusive visions in the head the more I keep telling myself that I've been fine every time when I've worried before and I get kinda annoyed at myself and just say my time will come when it comes ! I do think it's scarey knowing I have children that rely on me but weirdly I kinda thought to myself about all the funerals I had been to in lifetime and kept thinking back to the closest people to the loved one that passed and then i thought about how those people were coping now and how they had moved on and weirdly it kinda of settled me to think that with me here or not my loved ones will still go on to live a good life despite the momentarily trauma they would recieve if I was to kick the bucket. weirdly this helped me cope and stopped me worrying so much. I still do worry at times but not for the prolonged ammount if time I used to worry for. I also realised that speaking openly about my issues really helped. I told everyone of my internal struggles. friends, colleagues, family. I was surprised to hear the ammount of mental illness issues back from those i didn't expect to suffer from it. and also recieved some great advice from some. it also felt like it gave me a sort or protective bubble because everyone kinda knew me properly for my struggles and I suppose I felt my more safe.. anyways long post I know but I hope some of this relates or helps some out there.

X

P.S I should also mention I never decided to go down the medication route. although it was the first option i was given when speaking to a doctor about it. I was diagnosed with ADHD as a child and really felt the effects of different medications and saw how they changed me and for some reason I wasn't comfortable with that. one thing that also really helped me stop these intrusive thoughts wad to keep myself as busy as possible and keep myself engaged in something. for me I was just doing small jobs for others around work but even deciding to learn a new language, learning to read music or something thst just keeps your brain thinking about something else in those lonesome quite periods really helps stop the intrusive thoughts.

 

[shay1988]

I definitely feel you here! I still panic every time I get in a car! I feel so light headed and dizzy and start to panic that I'm going to wreck! And every time I feel a little weird I just know I'm dying! I've learned allot from good people on here. And I'm trying my best to stay calm and try and overcome this. It's so hard tho. I'm struggling bad with it. But one day I know I will accept this as what it is (anxiety) and move on with my life. Also welcome!!!

 

[JoshhLadd]

Hello and welcome! I know exactly where your coming from! I also suffer from health anxiety! I wake up every day just knowing somthing is going to happen to me I'm going to die soon and be no more! I have had two people I was close to die from blood clots in the brain, I think it's called aneurysm. And I freaked out about that for a while. But my heart is always! Beating so so fast and skipping beats and I freak out every day just knowing somthing is wrong with my heart and I'm going to die anytime soon! But I've been to Drs and the ER and they say I'm fine! But I don't feel fine! I also have children and a hubby. I have twins that are 8 years old and a 13 year old and a almost 16 year old. And I hate the thought of leaving them alone! But we can overcome this! It just will take time. I would love to talk more! I hope u find some peace soon! And again welcome!!!

Literally is how I feel about my 5 year old the more I think about it the more upset it makes me that I feel like this and can’t even be 100% myself for her and the thought of leaving her premature Scares the hell out of me

 

[MATD]

All of you have a common symptom, out of control fear. At the root is a lack of confidence in one’s self. We failed (yes, I include myself) to learn confidence early on. Why doesn’t matter but it helps to understand where you are now. Anxiety is just fear greatly exaggerated. Fear is a very powerful emotion that can turn mole hills into mountains. What is important is to get this fear back down to a normal level. Jonathan and I both preach about Dr Claire Weekes’ acceptance method for a reason, because we have both been there and know first hand what practicing acceptance can do. There is no magic pill to fix anxiety, pills cannot change your learned thought process. Anxiety is a disorder of the thought process that we developed over a long period of time because of the lack of confidence in ourselves, among other things. Practicing acceptance can and will help us to get that fear back down to a normal level where our own common sense can take back the reins. We have to learn to stop using descriptive words that describe our feelings, words are very powerful. We have to face and recognize our fear and allow it to be there but persevere through it without describing it or giving it more attention than it deserves. Acceptance actually starves the fear and gradually, over time, it can return to normal. Jonathan always says our anxiety is trying to tell us something, and he’s right. It’s telling us that we need to develop our self confidence, learn patience and perseverance. Life has no guarantees either, we need to learn to accept and live with this and simply do our best every day, one day at a time. That’s how confidence is built, by simply doing our best no matter what, accepting ourselves for the imperfect humans we are and forgiving ourselves for our shortcomings. We can not control certain things in life but we can control how we react to these situations.