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Anyone nervous to eat in front of girls? I'am

hades_leae

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I still til this day try and pretend that it doesn't affect me, but it's like I have to prove that I'm perfect in public, so eating sloppy in front of girls doesn't help the goal. I feel like there is no way to eat perfect unless I'm in a fancy restaurant and eating like everyone else where I place a napkin over my lap, and use the right utensils when the time come.


If I'm out eating a burger, and I make eye contact with a girl, especially if I'm attracted to her, I try to conceal how I'm eating by turning away a little so she don't see me gobble down my food. Does anyone else feel like this in a way?
 

joshposh

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I get that too. It doesn't happen often. If I'm trying to impress a particular girl then of course you are going to present yourself in a different light. But lately I've come to accept who and what I am, and not too concerned on how people look at me. You could say I grew out of it and have moved on with my life.


But in your case, it's normal. Everyone has the date jitters when they want to impress someone or is faced with an act that might lead to a major rejection. Think of it this way, if she can't accept you the way you are, then it was never meant to be. You can't live your whole life in a lie just to be with her.
 

hades_leae

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joshposh said:
I get that too. It doesn't happen often. If I'm trying to impress a particular girl then of course you are going to present yourself in a different light. But lately I've come to accept who and what I am, and not too concerned on how people look at me. You could say I grew out of it and have moved on with my life.
But in your case, it's normal. Everyone has the date jitters when they want to impress someone or is faced with an act that might lead to a major rejection. Think of it this way, if she can't accept you the way you are, then it was never meant to be. You can't live your whole life in a lie just to be with her.
But I don't really consider it me trying to impress them, it's just that I find them attractive, and I don't want to be seen doing something that looks embarrassing. I feel like that's my problem because I don't really know how to get over that feeling. I'm really not trying to impress them, I just feel like I need to watch my every move so that I don't make any mistakes.


This only happens when I see someone I'm really interested in, I get super nervous.
 

pwarbi

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People being nervous when it comes to eating in front of others or in a public place is actually quite common, and if you factor in that there might be a female (or male) there that you're attracted to as well, then the nervousness doubles! As with most aspects of anxiety, I put a lot down to a lack of self confidence and to overcome situations you need to try and repair your confidence even if it's just in small ways at first. Be more outgoing, expand your circle of friends, even join a gym to get you meting new people are all ways of boosting your self esteem, and while joining a gym and making new friends might seem like it as nothing to do with eating in front of others, you'll be surprised at just how much one part of your life can affect others.
 

joshposh

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hades_leae commented
Today, 06:17 AM


But I don't really consider it me trying to impress them, it's just that I find them attractive, and I don't want to be seen doing something that looks embarrassing. I feel like that's my problem because I don't really know how to get over that feeling. I'm really not trying to impress them, I just feel like I need to watch my every move so that I don't make any mistakes.


This only happens when I see someone I'm really interested in, I get super nervous.
You won't get over that feeling overnight. Acting like you're over it won't help either as that's just lying to yourself. These things take time and eventually acceptance. Just behave like you normally would. If they can't accept you for what you are, then it's their problem not yours. Right now you think you have a problem. You don't. You just want to be accepted, and worry if they will. Just let it go, and don't worry about it. If they can't accept you, it's their problem.
 

emmaruthnagano

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I might not be a boy but it's the same thing for girls. I have few friends who get so insecure and nervous eating. You do know that you will get more attention if you're nervous rather than eating comfortably. They know how you feel but you have to be confident. If they will disgust you for the way you eat, screw them they don't deserve to be in your life.
 

RichE8475

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I find myself questioning almost everything I do when I am in public. It does not matter if it is a woman or a man. My friends and family get irritated with me because of my agoraphobia. Always telling me that it is just in my head, and that no one cares what I do. For me, however, it feels as though I am the main focus, and everyone is talking about me or making fun of me. It is a never ending cycle, and I wish I could feel the way that they do and not care what other people think. I think once you find that one special person, male or female, you will learn to be comfortable with each other. This is the way my parents react around each other after thirty years of being together. My mother says that she use to get all nervous, but she tells me that mindset goes away eventually.
 

Robilas

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This happens to me aswell. I am pretty self conscious about how I eat, so I'm always extra careful when eating in public. I even tend to not order certain meals when I'm with girls (even if I'm not attracted to them) because it's just too embarassing. For example last night I really wanted to eat some pork ribs, but since they are too difficult to eat without making a mess I ended up ordering a steak.
 
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Not really, I mean, I am more careful when I'm eating with someone or just surrounded by people that I am when I am on my own, but I don't really get nervous or anxious if there's someone attractive next to me while I am eating. And If I really am into this person, I would probably wait until I finish my food to make a movement after that... my food comes first, lol. But I do know people who don't like to eat in front of anybody, at all, no matter if they are not attracted to them they just can't...
 

StillStanding

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I used to have a real problem with this then one day I started working in a new job and we only had 30mins break in 8-10hour shift, everyone, men and women, all piled into the break room and took out their lunches. I suddenly felt even more anxious about not eating as i would be only one. So I just got over it in that very moment. Such a relief as I quickly got used to it. Sometimes if I'm eating new foods in restaurants I can feel my stress levels rising but I just take breath, relax and do my best!
 

John Snort

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@OP, you can't impress or please everyone. When you try to please someone you'll have to do things you normally don't and this will cause you problems later. Be yourself. At all times. If someone doesn't like who you are then you most certainly don't need that person in your life.
 

beautifullybree

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I don't like eating in front of people in general if I don't know them. It doesn't matter their age or sex. I think more along the terms of "I'm not entitled to eat, because I'm heavier than I'd like to be". Often, when you are heavier people tend to think you over eat or indulge. I don't do that, but I don't appreciate the lingering eyes either. As a female I would like to tell you that being self conscious about it is less attractive than just eating how you normally would. I know it seems I don't have much room to speak on the matter, but my issue is completely different. If you want to impress her eat confidently. If you are already aware of how you are eating I can promise you you're being more clean and proper than most men. Good luck to you !
 
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