Am I crazy?

[FeelingDown]

Hi I'm new here. I've always had issues with school and university where if i would miss a day then i would be to scared to go back and then i would end up missing a lot of time now its starting with work. Since August i have had 5 jobs and quit them all. I just got a new job and i only started last Wednesday and i went those three days but then yesterday i freaked out and called in sick then i missed everyday and i just send in an email that told them i will not be coming back. I don't know what to do. It's not that i don't love my job, i work with children so i do love it very much , but this past couple of months i have been a basket case. I'm crying all the time. I'm so afraid this is going to come over me and I'm not going to be able to leave my house. I have another interview for a better job with better pay and it would be amazing if i got this, but I'm fearful the same thing will happen. has anyone at all felt like this? I feel like I'm going crazy. No one understands everyone keeps telling me to suck it up and go to work, but if i could do that i would, but that's the problem I can't. Please someone tell me I'm not crazy!

 

[triceps]

Hi I'm new here. I've always had issues with school and university where if i would miss a day then i would be to scared to go back and then i would end up missing a lot of time now its starting with work. Since August i have had 5 jobs and quit them all. I just got a new job and i only started last Wednesday and i went those three days but then yesterday i freaked out and called in sick then i missed everyday and i just send in an email that told them i will not be coming back. I don't know what to do. It's not that i don't love my job, i work with children so i do love it very much , but this past couple of months i have been a basket case. I'm crying all the time. I'm so afraid this is going to come over me and I'm not going to be able to leave my house. I have another interview for a better job with better pay and it would be amazing if i got this, but I'm fearful the same thing will happen. has anyone at all felt like this? I feel like I'm going crazy. No one understands everyone keeps telling me to suck it up and go to work, but if i could do that i would, but that's the problem I can't. Please someone tell me I'm not crazy!

Hi and welcome FeelingDown. First of all, if you're crazy, I'm also crazy. That might not be very comforting but it sounds like we both are just saddled with anxiety and depression. Have you spoken about your symptoms with your doctor? Even if you get that amazing job, there's a good possibility you'll run into the same difficulties you had with the previous jobs. Anxiety is generally something that doesn't allow you to just "suck it up" and things will be fine. You're going to need therapy, medication or both to break the cycle you're in. The folks on this forum are a great sounding board as we've gone through and are living with some form of what you're experiencing. Number 1, you're not crazy. Number 2, tell this same story you shared here with your doctor.

 

[Chris]

Hi @FeelingDown You are definitely not crazy!

See my anxiety works in the opposite way, and I almost wish I could just not show up like you. But I'm too afraid to miss a day or quit a job I hate because I'm afraid my boss/co-workers will hate me for quitting, or no one will ever want to hire me again, because i've quit before. So i'll suffer through the worst jobs because I'm too afraid to quit.

 

[butterfly67]

You are so NOT alone. I have been getting worse in the past ten years(I am 40). I have put on the smile and used my fake charm only to realize three or four days into a job or ANYTHING that I am once again terrified of everything and every one and back home feeling alone and better for the first day or two, relieved in some way. Then back to feeling worse again and sad and worthless I UNDERSTAND! Hang in there.

 

[scharley1973]

Hi I'm new here. I've always had issues with school and university where if i would miss a day then i would be to scared to go back and then i would end up missing a lot of time now its starting with work. Since August i have had 5 jobs and quit them all. I just got a new job and i only started last Wednesday and i went those three days but then yesterday i freaked out and called in sick then i missed everyday and i just send in an email that told them i will not be coming back. I don't know what to do. It's not that i don't love my job, i work with children so i do love it very much , but this past couple of months i have been a basket case. I'm crying all the time. I'm so afraid this is going to come over me and I'm not going to be able to leave my house. I have another interview for a better job with better pay and it would be amazing if i got this, but I'm fearful the same thing will happen. has anyone at all felt like this? I feel like I'm going crazy. No one understands everyone keeps telling me to suck it up and go to work, but if i could do that i would, but that's the problem I can't. Please someone tell me I'm not crazy!

feelingdown....YOU ARE NOT CRAZY! do you feel better ...no. doesnt really work that way, does it? i wish...you sound just like me! ive gone thru jobs and TRY to make it work...and it does for a little while but then my panic and anxiety kicks in and i just cant go, i cant drive, i cant rationalize anything, i just cant think straight. im scared most of the time. ive been talking with another person on this site that has helped alot but we really have to do the work ourselves. we can give advise and be there for you when you are down and needing help but we have to do it ourselves.i finally applied for disability because going thru jobs, like you mentioned, no one will hire us eventually because we arent reliable. i loved my job too...but its not fair to employers or to us to keep calling in sick and eventually just saying...I CANT DO IT ANYMORE. the disability people may disagree?? i havent heard anything back yet but i do know it takes awhile. im so sorry your going thru this but your not alone, all of us here have something afflicting us and we will be here for you. # we understand!