Tips for sitting with anxiety?! please

[Eli22]

I'm a runner when I get anxiety. If I'm home I go to my parents, if I'm out I go home, I don't ever leave town because what if I panic and need to come home. There's much more at play here but also I have OCD and very intrusive thoughts.
So I've got court coming up. It's huge. My sons well being is riding on this (I've done nothing wrong his dad did) but like I've been trying the "I'll worry about it when it gets here" approach and now it's here. My lawyer isn't at all concerned about court we have a solid case. I however am SCARED. I was going to get there like an hour early and do some breathing exercises but they've rescheduled to 9am now so we are first thing. Also I've got this fear of elevators so I can't take that up, and I don't have a fear of stairs but I've got a fear of panic attacks and my heart rate will go up going up the stairs. Basically I'm out of control here. I'm trying to get a zoom trial but we are coming up on the date and idk of we can get it done. There is a good possibility I've got to go into the courtroom.
That being said
"What if I panic and need to leave?"
"What if I can't get my heart rate down and ha e a panic attack?"
"What if I pass out in court?!"
"What if I pass out and hit my head?"
"What if the judge finds me incompetent of taking care of my son bc I'm clearly a basket case"

I literally cannot stop. My psychiatrist doesn't want to start new meds this close to trial. My therapist keeps giving me the ol "you can do it"

I know this sounds so dumb but if it was on the first floor I'd feel much better but it's not it's on the 3rd and idk how I'm going to 1. Get up there and 2. Go through what everyone is telling me could take up to two hours of court without needing to leave.....
How do I sit through it?? Has anyone had to just power through and can give me advice.?
Please don't make fun I stg I feel bad enough that I can't get these thoughts out of my head

 

[Seryn]

It may be a blessing in disguise. Because if you do have to sit there you will see that that the panic will rise but because you don't move it will then go. The second you sit through your first panic attack and don't use safety measures is the day you start to gain more control over panic.

The what ifs you've mentioned I've so been there so many times. You absolutely will not pass out. Just because you think you feel it and are thinking it means there is absolutely no way that's what the anxiety will cause to happen. Courts are very sympathetic to people feeling anxious. Just get there a bit early so that you can rest a bit after each floor. Use the stairs as your breathing exercises. Onestep breath in one step breath out.

Good luck with court. I've been there I understand.

 

[Eli22]

It may be a blessing in disguise. Because if you do have to sit there you will see that that the panic will rise but because you don't move it will then go. The second you sit through your first panic attack and don't use safety measures is the day you start to gain more control over panic.

The what ifs you've mentioned I've so been there so many times. You absolutely will not pass out. Just because you think you feel it and are thinking it means there is absolutely no way that's what the anxiety will cause to happen. Courts are very sympathetic to people feeling anxious. Just get there a bit early so that you can rest a bit after each floor. Use the stairs as your breathing exercises. Onestep breath in one step breath out.

Good luck with court. I've been there I understand.

Thank you! I've had one instance of sitting with anxiety and I felt very lightheaded afterwards as well! We had a tornado warning, I was watching it on the news head towards our town. It was a wild experience to say the least. Anyway I'm a wreck pacing the floor asking everyone why they're NOT freaking out. We make it through ok and then I got that "I'm going to pass out feeling" it was so strong and so intense. I think it was all the adrenaline wearing off. Took me a few hours to feel normal again. I'm hoping court isn't the same way. My lawyer keeps telling me to chill but I actually cannot. I had copied and pasted this post here looking for more help and actually court was supposed to be Friday but it's been postponed again, so here's to another 5 weeks of anticipation anxiety

 

[PieFan]

I use low dose propranolol to slow my heart rate if necessary @Eli22 I rarely need it these days, but this would be the kind of scenario I would carry it. Ask your GP or psychiatrist about it?

I have stone bracelets I wear one play with it systematically when I'm in anxious situations, and I carry hard candy and water. I do better if I know beforehand what to expect, where is the bathroom, what if I need to go (! I'm getting older)

 

[Chrissyjo]

I feel what you’re saying. A few years ago my anxiety affected my breathing and I was holding my breath when I got anxious and it got worse. I could not hold conversations with people as I could not talk while holding my breath. I developed a fear of talking to people, being stuck in situations etc. My big one was having to walk to far or up steps when I knew it meant talking to someone after. I didn’t want to get out of breath as I could’nt get back to normal in front of someone. Once I had to go up some steps to a lawyers office to sign papers, I had to take one step then keep stopping. I also hate elevators. I found either option terrifying. I also need to rush home when I’m having a panic attack. I want to go interstate to see my family but I’m terrified.
I’m way better talking to people now though. I still struggle to breath but I try to take deep breaths. A few months ago I started going out more to the shops or visiting people even when I was anxious to learn to talk to people again. I still have bad days, I can struggle to breath normal even when I’m alone coz my brain thinks bad thoughts. The only advice I could give you is get there as early as you can so you can get up the steps early, do you have a friend to go with? That helps me. If I’m in a room with lots of people I like to sit at the back to hide so no one is staring at me. Not sure if that helps at all. I also tell people that I don’t know well that I’m feeling unwell/ headache instead of saying anxiety so they don’t look at me weird. I agree with the other person who said to let the first wave of anxiety pass and you will feel better. You have to tell your body it’s ok to be there. If you walk out in a panic it will keep happening. The more bad anxiety/ situations I beat the better I got

have stone bracelets I wear one play with it systematically when I'm in anxious

This is good too. I always fidget or pick the skin around my nails. There’s lots of fidget jewellery you can get to help too

 

[Gooze17]

I don't know how common this is but I shut everything out for a minute close my eyes and breathe. If I'm in a place I can process and work through the anxiety I will. If I'm not, I do my best to shove it into a quieter corner of my mind. Doesn't always work but I've had decent luck with it

 

[AuntieDee]

Ok from reading yr post I’m seeing a lot of anticipatory anxiety, basically anticipating the worse case scenarios feeding yr anxiety. Going to court is for most people stress and anxiety inducing, for something as important as yr sons welfare, it is totally understandable to be this stressed out. I went to court once to fight a traffic ticket and I was petrified, so I can’t imagine yr levels right now. But, from what I’ve observed watching court cases most Judges and court staff are very aware of the anxiety and fear of appearing before the courts especially of the emotional turmoil when the case involves children. Seeing as you have sat with yr panic before, you know you can do it, keep that in mind, another thing is to talk to yr lawyer, let them know that you may have to “take a moment” to get yr anxiety under control. Unless you start going off about aliens and conspiracy theories, I doubt the court will hold yr stress levels against you. Remember it’s yr anxiety flight response telling you to leave, that is all, is it uncomfortable, absolutely, but you have dealt with it before, you can do it again. Stop anticipating the worse about what might happen with yr anxiety, it’s hard I know, but run through yr “what if” techniques, practice the 3-3-3 technique and you will make it through. Good luck, I wish you the best.

 

[Eli22]

I feel what you’re saying. A few years ago my anxiety affected my breathing and I was holding my breath when I got anxious and it got worse. I could not hold conversations with people as I could not talk while holding my breath. I developed a fear of talking to people, being stuck in situations etc. My big one was having to walk to far or up steps when I knew it meant talking to someone after. I didn’t want to get out of breath as I could’nt get back to normal in front of someone. Once I had to go up some steps to a lawyers office to sign papers, I had to take one step then keep stopping. I also hate elevators. I found either option terrifying. I also need to rush home when I’m having a panic attack. I want to go interstate to see my family but I’m terrified.
I’m way better talking to people now though. I still struggle to breath but I try to take deep breaths. A few months ago I started going out more to the shops or visiting people even when I was anxious to learn to talk to people again. I still have bad days, I can struggle to breath normal even when I’m alone coz my brain thinks bad thoughts. The only advice I could give you is get there as early as you can so you can get up the steps early, do you have a friend to go with? That helps me. If I’m in a room with lots of people I like to sit at the back to hide so no one is staring at me. Not sure if that helps at all. I also tell people that I don’t know well that I’m feeling unwell/ headache instead of saying anxiety so they don’t look at me weird. I agree with the other person who said to let the first wave of anxiety pass and you will feel better. You have to tell your body it’s ok to be there. If you walk out in a panic it will keep happening. The more bad anxiety/ situations I beat the better I got

This is good too. I always fidget or pick the skin around my nails. There’s lots of fidget jewellery you can get to help too

Yes! So actually our court is open to the public. I have my dad, my fiancé, and the other girl that is in this case as well has a support system coming. So we have lots of people on our side. Even the cps workers that aren't testifying for us are coming in support!

 

[Joshua1]

I passed out twice, once with COVID19 and once when water fasting. Fainting a problem depending where you are when you faint. Just have faith and be carefree with life but be focused.