Can anyone help me out?

[Jake2006]

Hi there, I’m Jake and I’m 16 years old in sixth form college in the Uk. For years now I’ve had fairly mild social anxiety, and I’m just all around awkward with people But since my GCSE exams, where I started getting very nervous before each exam to the point of nausea, I have often been getting nervous for no apparent reason. Like before I go out somewhere, like to my karate lesson, to school, to the gym, I just feel like throwing up. And a very big culprit for this is talking to my ex girlfriend, who broke up with me after just over a month because she wasn’t really ready for a relationship. There are no hard feelings between us, we get on well and who knows maybe she will want to try again one day, I don’t mind either way I just want her to be happy. Anyway, I’m getting off topic here. When I think about her or talk to her I get so nervous and feel sick, and sometimes throw up. We both go to the same gym, and sometimes go together. When I’m working out (which by the way, the gym and her is my whole life haha), I seem to be ok, but as soon as I step out of the gym and she’s with me, it kicks back in.
This also sometimes results in mild diarrhea, forgot to mention that.
Anyway, this is causing so much trouble in my life and it needs to go. Any thoughts?
thanks, sorry for ranting

**UPDATE** - Yesterday I managed the entire day without any symptoms, and this include standing outside the gym with ‘her’ for like 20 minutes just chatting and having a laugh whilst we waited for her parents to collect her

 

[PieFan]

Hi @Jake2006 and welcome.

the gym and her is my whole life haha

If you are more anxious when another person is around as you get older you may realize that's often a sign that you need a little distance from the person, for a while at least.

It's a good time to try a few new things, hobbies or groups maybe. Are you going to college?

 

[Jake2006]

Hi @Jake2006 and welcome.



If you are more anxious when another person is around as you get older you may realize that's often a sign that you need a little distance from the person, for a while at least.

It's a good time to try a few new things, hobbies or groups maybe. Are you going to college?

Well idk if I need distance from her, idk why I get anxious it just happens, cus I really want to see her and talk to her. And usually after like 5-10 minutes of trying to relax I can get myself together and then I’m completely fine with her ‍ And yes I go to college

 

[Jonathan123]

Hi there, I’m Jake and I’m 16 years old in sixth form college in the Uk. For years now I’ve had fairly mild social anxiety, and I’m just all around awkward with people But since my GCSE exams, where I started getting very nervous before each exam to the point of nausea, I have often been getting nervous for no apparent reason. Like before I go out somewhere, like to my karate lesson, to school, to the gym, I just feel like throwing up. And a very big culprit for this is talking to my ex girlfriend, who broke up with me after just over a month because she wasn’t really ready for a relationship. There are no hard feelings between us, we get on well and who knows maybe she will want to try again one day, I don’t mind either way I just want her to be happy. Anyway, I’m getting off topic here. When I think about her or talk to her I get so nervous and feel sick, and sometimes throw up. We both go to the same gym, and sometimes go together. When I’m working out (which by the way, the gym and her is my whole life haha), I seem to be ok, but as soon as I step out of the gym and she’s with me, it kicks back in.
This also sometimes results in mild diarrhea, forgot to mention that.
Anyway, this is causing so much trouble in my life and it needs to go. Any thoughts?
thanks, sorry for ranting

Hi, and Welcome. Social anxiety can really affect our lives. How we relate to others in our environment can become very trying when we have social anxiety. It so often comes from our perception of what others may think of us. This can affect our self worth. We may react to any criticism or negative remarks from others about us and our lifestyle. We take so much to heart in SA. Never feel sorry for talking to us on this site. It's what we are all here for, to help each other from our own experiences. One of the big problems with SA is that it can affect our relationships with others, especially with those we may be closely attached to. It can frighten them off, especially if they don't understand. At your age any anxiety problem may seem awful, but try and accept it as being normal in the circumstances, and recognise the fact that you may well be a sensitive person. Sensitive people do suffer in this world. They react strongly to any negative emotions. It can all be very upsetting, but try and accept the feelings without adding fear to fear.
There are pressures on those of your age which many of us never had to face at the same age. Peer pressure can be vey strong, the desire to conform. Try and take life as it comes. Does it really matter what others think of you if you are happy in yourself because you act from love and compassion? You have your life ahead of you, so try and accept it all as part of being human, and maybe a sensitive one.