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Why am I so negative?

MissUnderstood

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Hi, everyone! I'd like to ask how people stay positive when they have so much negative in their life? I'm not a bubbly person to begin with. I'm not fake. I'm honest to a fault. If something is bothering me I find it hard to pretend everything is fine. I get told often that I have a negative attitude. I'm not sure if this is just peoples' way of turning the tables on me, or not. I'm thinking it is, at least part of the time. You see, I don't like to sweep things under the carpet and pretend they don't exist. I like to get it out in the open and resolve issues. If I don't get it out it turns into anxiety, mood swings, tension headaches, tiredness, etc. How can I discuss things that bother me and not sound negative? Is it me, or is it just people not wanting to own their issues? I have a lot of anxiety about unresolved issues. It affects my work, my relationships, my well-being...
 

Akenn

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Hi, everyone! I'd like to ask how people stay positive when they have so much negative in their life? I'm not a bubbly person to begin with. I'm not fake. I'm honest to a fault. If something is bothering me I find it hard to pretend everything is fine. I get told often that I have a negative attitude. I'm not sure if this is just peoples' way of turning the tables on me, or not. I'm thinking it is, at least part of the time. You see, I don't like to sweep things under the carpet and pretend they don't exist. I like to get it out in the open and resolve issues. If I don't get it out it turns into anxiety, mood swings, tension headaches, tiredness, etc. How can I discuss things that bother me and not sound negative? Is it me, or is it just people not wanting to own their issues? I have a lot of anxiety about unresolved issues. It affects my work, my relationships, my well-being...
I too have a hard time staying positive. So many negative things to count. I try to look on bright side but something else always happens. I have tried to be a kind person always taking on others burdens to help them. Mostly unappreciative people. Someone recently told me that some people dont know how to love they take you hostage. I have to learn to accept it and not lend myself to their every whim. Believe me when you stop they notice and talk about you and are not supportive knowing you are going through a difficult time.
 

Pandora593

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Jun 12, 2019
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Hi, everyone! I'd like to ask how people stay positive when they have so much negative in their life? I'm not a bubbly person to begin with. I'm not fake. I'm honest to a fault. If something is bothering me I find it hard to pretend everything is fine. I get told often that I have a negative attitude. I'm not sure if this is just peoples' way of turning the tables on me, or not. I'm thinking it is, at least part of the time. You see, I don't like to sweep things under the carpet and pretend they don't exist. I like to get it out in the open and resolve issues. If I don't get it out it turns into anxiety, mood swings, tension headaches, tiredness, etc. How can I discuss things that bother me and not sound negative? Is it me, or is it just people not wanting to own their issues? I have a lot of anxiety about unresolved issues. It affects my work, my relationships, my well-being...
This is definitely me too! Idk if our brains are wired differently or if people generally dont think this way... i have been called the “negative nancy” on multiple occasions. But i feel like if I’m not honest, then that’s no good either. to say nothing is even worse. I think that’s when my sarcasm, my attitude , idk i just come off as irritable and sharp tongued...i dont mean to be that way, I just would rather be forthcoming and honest than not but then people just assume you like to complain or be miserable and it’s not the case, at least for me, I guess from my past , I’m quicker to identify negative things around me than positive. I think a lot of people do and just dont talk about it... but yeah idk how to change that . I know people have said to try saying 3 positive things for every “negative “ thought or idk just try to go a whole day without saying something negative but it’s honestly just become so normal that sometimes i dont realize I’m ranting or b****ing until i stop and take a breath...:/ and then i feel bad because I don’t want to burden someone with my opinions thoughts and feelings, but idk what else to do. I’ve journaled, I’ve looked for outlets, idk it’s always better to talk to someone so they can give feedback but it’s contradicting when people say “ it’s never good to hold it in! You can talk to me about anything! “ then those same people are the ones who get annoyed and say youre so miserable when you do express yourself...


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KimStarrySky

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Sep 11, 2019
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I can relate. People have told me that I think too much, or to stop worrying. Or if this is something that won't matter in 10 years to let it go. But I can't because these are issues I believe will always be. I worry about so much, including the environment, humans' effects on the world and war/violence. I think some people get it and can relate, and some people just can't. I'm a very sensitive person. I feel a lot.
 

MainerMikeBrown

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Years ago, I was a very nervous and anxious person. And some people would tell me to calm down and that I worried too much.

I knew back then that I worried too much. I agreed with them there. But I couldn't help it.

Now I'm a lot more calm. However, I can relate to what it's like to be too worried and too negative.

Staying positive when theirs a lot of negative in your life can be helped if you try to surround yourself with positive things.
 

ladybj

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Sep 14, 2019
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Hi, everyone! I'd like to ask how people stay positive when they have so much negative in their life? I'm not a bubbly person to begin with. I'm not fake. I'm honest to a fault. If something is bothering me I find it hard to pretend everything is fine. I get told often that I have a negative attitude. I'm not sure if this is just peoples' way of turning the tables on me, or not. I'm thinking it is, at least part of the time. You see, I don't like to sweep things under the carpet and pretend they don't exist. I like to get it out in the open and resolve issues. If I don't get it out it turns into anxiety, mood swings, tension headaches, tiredness, etc. How can I discuss things that bother me and not sound negative? Is it me, or is it just people not wanting to own their issues? I have a lot of anxiety about ,issues. It affects my work, my relationships, my well-being...
Are you speaking of people you know with negativity in their life? I do not have a lot of negative in my life because I choose not to. You should not have to pretend. People will or will not accept you for who you are. If they do not accept you for who you are, that's their issue not yours. There will be some people that will not like you no matter what and that's ok. We cannot cater our life around pleasing everybody..that's a very hard burden to bare. Sounds like you are taking on other people issues. Getting your feelings out should not cause you anxiety, mood swings. Do you have confidence in your self? Do you know your self worth? Sometimes we cannot resolve all our issues with people and that's ok because they have issues of their own that conflict with ours. We choose negativity or positivity in our life.
 
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