Trying to get people to believe you can get anxious

[Alex]

I'm actually a pretty tough person, even ruthless which is why people don't think or understand that I can get anxious about things. They simply don't believe it, but I. like others control it, but have buttons that can be pushed.


Yesterday my father was pushing me to the limit. I was getting frustrated at him asking me to do useless tasks that weren't even necessary, but it made him less anxious. As he has had heart surgery and I don't want him to collapse and die I comply, but that's the only reason why. I think people don't understand that strong people can still get anxious, even though I can be outspoken at times. In the end I spelled it out to my father and put my foot down, but only when I couldn't take it any longer.


One thing this has taught me, is that anxiety occurs in people from all walks of life, and we should remember that.

 

[Choochoo]

I think people do tend to gravitate to simplistic preconceived notions of what certain types of people are or should be but at the core of it all we are all a mix of a lot of things and we are all different mixes that way despite us all still being similar. I guess people expect anxious types to behave a certain way, probably how media has portrayed anxious types, so people just assume everyone is like that, but as with any other disorder it can be present in any type of personality. 

 

[djanx]

Well, that's mainly other people problem and not something that you can control. So, why bother? The thing is when people can't get on board, just try to find someone online who'll listen or write it down or talk about it to yourself. I mean there are so many things you can do. If someone can't believe you, you can try to convince them. But, chances are that they probably see you as a source of strength and seeing you being anxious probably makes them more so.


Specific to your situation: You're probably a source of strength for your father. And he needs you now more than ever. God forbid if he's not around tomorrow, you won't just feel anxious, you'll feel a lot many other things. Keeping all that in mind, take care of him. If you can afford it, find a nurse who'll take care of him at home or something. I think if you show any signs of being irritated, he will feel depressed. And that's not a good thing either. 

 

[stephonline]

My sister was just telling my family about this yesterday and I saw that some family members were finding it hard to believe. It was making me so frustrated to see that some people did not believe her. I did though. I knew that she was getting anxious when she goes shopping and I was trying to teach her some of my calming techniques. Just know that you DO NOT need anyone else for approval or belief of your symptoms. You know and you can go to the doctors to get it verified.

 

[HappyKoi]

This is a big problem for a lot of us.  In a way I'm not surprised at family members not understanding, because for so many of us, our anxiety started in childhood and got worse as we got older.  It still hurts quite a bit when our families don't believe that we are having problems or don't seem to understand how mental illness affects us.  It is a pretty sad thing to feel like we're not being supported.  That being said, I've had someone who was helping me say that I didn't sound anxious.  At first I was offended and hurt, but I realized later that I have had so many years of hiding my anxiety that I do it automatically in my tone of voice.  Fortunately, when I said I was indeed feeling anxious, he believed me and helped me out.  Strong people can certainly get anxious, and they can have PTSD and depression and all kinds of things.  The myth that someone can't have weaknesses is damaging.