The most severe health anxiety: I’m at my lowest point

[Kendrag2018]

Ever since I was a child, the idea of cancer scared me. I grew up with a father who suffered from brain cancer. So I learned about the severity of cancer very early on in life. The anxiety I experienced was there but was not as bad as it is today. My father then passed away when I was 18 and from then on my anxiety has only gotten worse. A couple of years ago I had convinced myself that I had lymph node cancer. My poor boyfriend took me to so many doctors and it was just the worst. I suffered with some severe depression after that but managed to pick myself back up. I got a bit better after that but became more in tune with the small pains and of course as most of you know, Dr. Google had become my prime source for diagnosis. About a month ago I had minor cramping and diagnosed myself with ovarian cancer. I went to a doctor and they told me that it was probably just constipation as I just recently moved and the doctor said the stress from that probably caused the constipation. I insisted on blood work but all came back normal. As soon as I received the call with my blood results, the cramps stopped and I haven’t felt them since. Of course I’m assuming that 90% of that cramp pain I had been feeling was all in my head. Now yesterday my fiancé pointed out that a very small mole on my back looked crusty, almost scabbed over. Now I get back pimples a lot and I tend to scratch and pick at my back a lot. So the rational part of my brain is telling me that I probably just scratched the mole and caused it to bleed and scab. Something similar happened like this years ago with a different small mole and I never even thought anything of it. But now that my anxiety is at its peak, I’ve diagnosed myself with skin cancer. I’m am at my absolute low, my health anxiety has never been this bad and it’s causing me to google and search for all types of reassurance. I hate how this disorder has taken over my life and left me crying. It’s destroying my happiness. I don’t know where to go from here.

 

[georgey]

I know how you feel ..it's taking over my life now 2..I'm just started yoga ..and I stopped looking up symptoms I get worse when I look up symptoms..this sucks

 

[Richard G]

Ever since I was a child, the idea of cancer scared me. I grew up with a father who suffered from brain cancer. So I learned about the severity of cancer very early on in life. The anxiety I experienced was there but was not as bad as it is today. My father then passed away when I was 18 and from then on my anxiety has only gotten worse. A couple of years ago I had convinced myself that I had lymph node cancer. My poor boyfriend took me to so many doctors and it was just the worst. I suffered with some severe depression after that but managed to pick myself back up. I got a bit better after that but became more in tune with the small pains and of course as most of you know, Dr. Google had become my prime source for diagnosis. About a month ago I had minor cramping and diagnosed myself with ovarian cancer. I went to a doctor and they told me that it was probably just constipation as I just recently moved and the doctor said the stress from that probably caused the constipation. I insisted on blood work but all came back normal. As soon as I received the call with my blood results, the cramps stopped and I haven’t felt them since. Of course I’m assuming that 90% of that cramp pain I had been feeling was all in my head. Now yesterday my fiancé pointed out that a very small mole on my back looked crusty, almost scabbed over. Now I get back pimples a lot and I tend to scratch and pick at my back a lot. So the rational part of my brain is telling me that I probably just scratched the mole and caused it to bleed and scab. Something similar happened like this years ago with a different small mole and I never even thought anything of it. But now that my anxiety is at its peak, I’ve diagnosed myself with skin cancer. I’m am at my absolute low, my health anxiety has never been this bad and it’s causing me to google and search for all types of reassurance. I hate how this disorder has taken over my life and left me crying. It’s destroying my happiness. I don’t know where to go from here.

Kendrag: This is what I've been going through of late....skin cancer fears, lymph nodes must be swollen, oral cancer... you name it. It really becomes debilitating. I've found the best thing is to try to concentrate on something positive..what are you looking forward to - it could be today, tomorrow, or even next year..just divert the attention. A lot of this stems from the fear of losing our good health and what we enjoy about life. Counseling has helped me some.

 

[MYKA]

Ever since I was a child, the idea of cancer scared me. I grew up with a father who suffered from brain cancer. So I learned about the severity of cancer very early on in life. The anxiety I experienced was there but was not as bad as it is today. My father then passed away when I was 18 and from then on my anxiety has only gotten worse. A couple of years ago I had convinced myself that I had lymph node cancer. My poor boyfriend took me to so many doctors and it was just the worst. I suffered with some severe depression after that but managed to pick myself back up. I got a bit better after that but became more in tune with the small pains and of course as most of you know, Dr. Google had become my prime source for diagnosis. About a month ago I had minor cramping and diagnosed myself with ovarian cancer. I went to a doctor and they told me that it was probably just constipation as I just recently moved and the doctor said the stress from that probably caused the constipation. I insisted on blood work but all came back normal. As soon as I received the call with my blood results, the cramps stopped and I haven’t felt them since. Of course I’m assuming that 90% of that cramp pain I had been feeling was all in my head. Now yesterday my fiancé pointed out that a very small mole on my back looked crusty, almost scabbed over. Now I get back pimples a lot and I tend to scratch and pick at my back a lot. So the rational part of my brain is telling me that I probably just scratched the mole and caused it to bleed and scab. Something similar happened like this years ago with a different small mole and I never even thought anything of it. But now that my anxiety is at its peak, I’ve diagnosed myself with skin cancer. I’m am at my absolute low, my health anxiety has never been this bad and it’s causing me to google and search for all types of reassurance. I hate how this disorder has taken over my life and left me crying. It’s destroying my happiness. I don’t know where to go from here.

i feel you. i am also suffering for being paranoid when it comes to my health. what i have worry about is that every time i feel something different w/ myself, i am started to panic which i needed to check again in google and get an assurance from my love ones.my anxiety level will be rise up again like nervous,cold hands, feeling fatigue, blurry then will cry all the time, this will make my day very very bad and heavy.. then there is another symptoms will notice again and again.. i really hate this feeling. the feeling that you almost tired of everything. i have a check up today with a new doctor again for my 2nd opinion as even i dont have any internal bleeding in butt now i am decided for a colonoscopy procedure just to finish this anxiety.. i am already tired of seeing blood in my poo whenever my hemorrhoids is flaring up (my love ones told me its an hems only but i am not satisfied even the first doctor checked up on me). the problem is Dr. google helped my subconscious mind to think negatively that is why it is hard for me to accept that this is just a minor illness.. its been 1 year since to decide for doing this colonoscopy as i am very scared and lack of money also.

i am not in a position to advice you if what is the best for you as we are on the same path..what i had learned is to accept the fact that everything is happen for a reason.. we need to accept that it is just part of our life now. we will survive if we manage and handle if you're in the panic situation.. there is a saying that " your god will not give you problem unless you cant handle it. let go let god. you are not a living human if you're are not experiencing problem