Talking to my Counselor About Depression

[Camden]

Hi all, I have my next doctor appointment in a few days. I need to talk to him about my medication dosages and how things have been going in general the past 8 weeks since I saw him last.

I’ve been feeling really “off” lately. A few things I’ve noticed within myself:

1. Having trouble falling asleep and then feeling tired the next morning.

2. Loss of interest in my hobbies. It takes a lot of willpower to bring myself to do things I like.

3. I feel impending doom all the time and think something bad and unexpected will happen every day.

4. On week nights I’m anxious to get to bed as early as possible to avoid appearing tired the next day.

5 I’ve felt really sad and concerned about some family members’ health issues. Once of which was just diagnosed with cancer.

6. I randomly have sad intrusive thoughts, such as a thought of a scene from a tear-jerking movie or a sad memory form my past.

7. Normal tasks like doing laundry, cooking, and going to visit friends all seem overwhelming and more demanding than I know they actually are.

8. I feel inadequate at work. I feel unappreciated and as if they’re going to look for reasons to complain about me and get me fired.

9. It’s hard for me to get excited about good things happening. I’d go as far as to say my ability to feel pleasure is decreasing.

Would a list like this be beneficial in my upcoming appointment? Are there other types of questions I can expect if we are discussing the possibility of depression?

 

[Sweet T]

I’m so sorry you are feeling this way. It’s tough to do what you need when you are depressed.
Yes this list would very very helpful to your counselor.
it sounds like you are really trying. That’s admirable. Be gentle with yourself. Change takes time. Good luck!

 

[Camden]

I’m so sorry you are feeling this way. It’s tough to do what you need when you are depressed.
Yes this list would very very helpful to your counselor.
it sounds like you are really trying. That’s admirable. Be gentle with yourself. Change takes time. Good luck!

Thank you Sweet T!

It’a been a long road dealing with anxiety and I feel like some life circumstances are making me feel like this. I know depression is a very complicated disorder, however I do feel like I need to talk to my counselor about my experiences and see for sure if it’s a real issue. I don’t know if my feelings can be attributed to my ongoing life experiences or if this is a naturally occurring, genetic thing for me. I don’t know if anyone else in my family has had depression.

 

[MATD]

Depression is very common with anxiety. Often a result of the stress from anxiety. But then, is it any wonder? Anxiety does a number on us. It wears us down. You are doing the right thing discussing it with your doctor. You should also be aware there is little they can do, other than raising you med level or prescribing something different or adding another med. Depression isn’t any more complicated than anxiety. Most often, as I mentioned, it’s a result of the anxiety stress. Most folks with anxiety also experience depression. It‘s also very common for the depression to lift as the anxiety is resolved. You can use the acceptance method for your depression symptoms right along with the anxiety symptoms. Basically, you can choose to accept depression as a result of the anxiety and apply the method to the thoughts and feelings depression brings. Acceptance is not limited to anxiety, it can be applied to all the ups and downs in life. James wrote that he used acceptance when he dropped a piece of buttered bread face down on the floor. Why? He chose to use acceptance rather than react negatively to even a small nuisance. This application of the method eventually helps us realize we Do HAVE A CHOICE in how we react and the power within ourself to make the choice to not react. It isn’t readily realized when we first begin to practice acceptance, but eventually it will come if we let it. I’m about five months in on practice now, and I have achieved this. One of the elements of acceptance is exactly this, restoring our ability to be in control of our reactions and emotions. It gives us back the ability to choose. Whereas anxiety and depression both rob us of this ability (or more likely, we never exercised it before, not being aware we had a choice, we just went wherever our thoughts took us, in pure ignorance.). Acceptance is a method to help develop self discipline, make us stop and think before we react. As I continue practice, my mind is opening up and I am able to see things differently, which helps me think differently, more healthy, more reasonably. So while you may feel depressed right now, understand if you continue practice, it can get better, and use acceptance to counter the depression as well. Something else you said in one of your other posts stood out to me, you said you ignored thoughts and feelings, if I’m correct. Don’t do this. Ignoring is the same as fighting. It’s shoving these thoughts and feelings back down. We have to face them, by acknowledgement, allow them to come out in the open into the light, accept them, call them what they are, either anxiety or depressive thoughts, and don’t fight them, don’t react, just let them exist where you can see them. This is important for developing your inner voice of truth. Every time you counter them, it’s a victory, it’s helping develop your inner voice of truth and strengthens you. Hope this all makes sense to you. But just know that if you continue to practice, you will make it thru the fire. Go back and reread, as often as you need to. It helps bring out points we miss or need to remind ourselves of. Just do the best you can, it does not need to be perfect, you just need to try.

 

[Camden]

Depression is very common with anxiety. Often a result of the stress from anxiety. But then, is it any wonder? Anxiety does a number on us. It wears us down. You are doing the right thing discussing it with your doctor. You should also be aware there is little they can do, other than raising you med level or prescribing something different or adding another med. Depression isn’t any more complicated than anxiety. Most often, as I mentioned, it’s a result of the anxiety stress. Most folks with anxiety also experience depression. It‘s also very common for the depression to lift as the anxiety is resolved. You can use the acceptance method for your depression symptoms right along with the anxiety symptoms. Basically, you can choose to accept depression as a result of the anxiety and apply the method to the thoughts and feelings depression brings. Acceptance is not limited to anxiety, it can be applied to all the ups and downs in life. James wrote that he used acceptance when he dropped a piece of buttered bread face down on the floor. Why? He chose to use acceptance rather than react negatively to even a small nuisance. This application of the method eventually helps us realize we Do HAVE A CHOICE in how we react and the power within ourself to make the choice to not react. It isn’t readily realized when we first begin to practice acceptance, but eventually it will come if we let it. I’m about five months in on practice now, and I have achieved this. One of the elements of acceptance is exactly this, restoring our ability to be in control of our reactions and emotions. It gives us back the ability to choose. Whereas anxiety and depression both rob us of this ability (or more likely, we never exercised it before, not being aware we had a choice, we just went wherever our thoughts took us, in pure ignorance.). Acceptance is a method to help develop self discipline, make us stop and think before we react. As I continue practice, my mind is opening up and I am able to see things differently, which helps me think differently, more healthy, more reasonably. So while you may feel depressed right now, understand if you continue practice, it can get better, and use acceptance to counter the depression as well. Something else you said in one of your other posts stood out to me, you said you ignored thoughts and feelings, if I’m correct. Don’t do this. Ignoring is the same as fighting. It’s shoving these thoughts and feelings back down. We have to face them, by acknowledgement, allow them to come out in the open into the light, accept them, call them what they are, either anxiety or depressive thoughts, and don’t fight them, don’t react, just let them exist where you can see them. This is important for developing your inner voice of truth. Every time you counter them, it’s a victory, it’s helping develop your inner voice of truth and strengthens you. Hope this all makes sense to you. But just know that if you continue to practice, you will make it thru the fire. Go back and reread, as often as you need to. It helps bring out points we miss or need to remind ourselves of. Just do the best you can, it does not need to be perfect, you just need to try.

Thank you MATD!

It’s good that you mention that depression is no more complicated than anxiety and it’s often the result of the stress long-term anxiety can cause. I’m feeling “burnt out” for lack of a better word.

I would have never thought to apply acceptance to depressive symptoms. Thank you for that insight! I admit it seems totally backwards for me to accept that I’m depressed because of how bad it makes me feel emotionally and physically. I can see how it works, taking the power away from the hopeless, sad, and pessimistic thoughts that are invading my mind. Emasculating those thoughts is my goal, and definitely something I can ask my counselor more about.

This really matters a lot to me because I think it will help me in all aspects of my life. I remember times when I wasn’t depressed and they were amazing. I know there will never be any perfect, stress free periods, however I know I can do better that what I’m dealing with now. Thanks for your continued support!

 

[MATD]

burnt out is a good way of describing it. As with anything stressful, even a job, something has to give or we end up like you describe. The good news is that with continued practice, and a heaping helping of patience, we can continue on to a better way. I’m glad I could help and wish you the best. And keep reading! Over and over as needed!

 

[Camden]

burnt out is a good way of describing it. As with anything stressful, even a job, something has to give or we end up like you describe. The good news is that with continued practice, and a heaping helping of patience, we can continue on to a better way. I’m glad I could help and wish you the best. And keep reading! Over and over as needed!

My counselor and I made a huge breakthrough today. I like to journal and write out very specific situations and feelings I encounter, which enhances what I get out of my therapy sessions.

The explanation for my depressed period, generalized anxiety. We discussed this condition and it is an almost perfect match for what I am experiencing, and have been experiencing in the past four months. It’s no wonder I’ve been feeling so burnt out and emotionally drained.

I am going to try a controlled release version of my medication for the next two months. Controlled release is apparently better fit for generalized anxiety vs. OCD, my initial prognosis. I’m sure this change will be beneficial.

 

[MATD]

I’m not surprised. After a host of doctors, I was diagnosed with bipolar and depression and OCD, each one an individual diagnosis. It was my own research that finally told me it was GAD/depression. Not one doctor ever diagnosed me correctly. Multiple symptoms like OCD, social anxiety and health anxiety all fall under one diagnosis, GAD. You get a nice array of many symptoms to deal with all at one time. Just be aware that this means absolutely nothing other than having more issues to deal with and the acceptance method works on all of it the same way. Anxiety has been labeled as to the different ways it manifests, but it is still caused by the same low confidence and negative thinking. Anxiety also changes over time, it can wax and wane or morph into more severity, most likely due to the way we handle it, ie: our reaction to it, what we can handle, our own understanding and other factors. My own anxiety morphed early on from panic attacks to full blown GAD. I literally stopped having panic attacks and instead went into a constant state of fear. Like I said, the acceptance method works on all the symptoms, even the depression. I’m glad you had a good session, but I want you to remember that buttered bread. Whatever you experience, new or same old thing, apply the method. Also be aware of taking this extended release med and if they upped your dosage, be watchful for symptoms that could be med induced. This is just a caution, so you aren’t blindsided by changes that aren’t helpful. Speaking from experience here. Sometimes too much med isn’t a good thing. Keep us posted, check in if you have any problems. I’ll be watching for you.

 

[Sweet T]

That’s great news. I hope you’ll continue to share your journey. It gives us all hope.

 

[Jonathan123]

I’m not surprised. After a host of doctors, I was diagnosed with bipolar and depression and OCD, each one an individual diagnosis. It was my own research that finally told me it was GAD/depression. Not one doctor ever diagnosed me correctly. Multiple symptoms like OCD, social anxiety and health anxiety all fall under one diagnosis, GAD. You get a nice array of many symptoms to deal with all at one time. Just be aware that this means absolutely nothing other than having more issues to deal with and the acceptance method works on all of it the same way. Anxiety has been labeled as to the different ways it manifests, but it is still caused by the same low confidence and negative thinking. Anxiety also changes over time, it can wax and wane or morph into more severity, most likely due to the way we handle it, ie: our reaction to it, what we can handle, our own understanding and other factors. My own anxiety morphed early on from panic attacks to full blown GAD. I literally stopped having panic attacks and instead went into a constant state of fear. Like I said, the acceptance method works on all the symptoms, even the depression. I’m glad you had a good session, but I want you to remember that buttered bread. Whatever you experience, new or same old thing, apply the method. Also be aware of taking this extended release med and if they upped your dosage, be watchful for symptoms that could be med induced. This is just a caution, so you aren’t blindsided by changes that aren’t helpful. Speaking from experience here. Sometimes too much med isn’t a good thing. Keep us posted, check in if you have any problems. I’ll be watching for you.

Once again you have summed it all up so eloquently. I do like the analogy of the buttered bread falling face down It's called
'Sod's Law'. There are so many examples of this in life. If you are driving along a country lane with no passing places you are bound to meet a great big oil tanker coming the other way!! I totally agree about acceptance, and even at the risk of repeating ourselves it is still the only real method for lasting relief. Of course, there are a many good therapies about and acceptance is not always easy. In counselling I always suggested acceptance combined with seeking causes to be beneficial. But acceptance can work without finding causes. Dr. Weekes' came up against so much disbelief from her psychiatrist colleagues over the years. Her methods were considered too simple. But maybe we make it all too complicated. Acceptance is portable! We can take it with us to any event that may be trying.
Any future set back can be dealt with in the same way. But it has to be total acceptance. No sitting down and accepting for an hour or so and expecting miracles. Acceptance takes time to click in. It is a 24/7 therapy.

 

[MATD]

Once again you have summed it all up so eloquently. I do like the analogy of the buttered bread falling face down It's called
'Sod's Law'. There are so many examples of this in life. If you are driving along a country lane with no passing places you are bound to meet a great big oil tanker coming the other way!! I totally agree about acceptance, and even at the risk of repeating ourselves it is still the only real method for lasting relief. Of course, there are a many good therapies about and acceptance is not always easy. In counselling I always suggested acceptance combined with seeking causes to be beneficial. But acceptance can work without finding causes. Dr. Weekes' came up against so much disbelief from her psychiatrist colleagues over the years. Her methods were considered too simple. But maybe we make it all too complicated. Acceptance is portable! We can take it with us to any event that may be trying.
Any future set back can be dealt with in the same way. But it has to be total acceptance. No sitting down and accepting for an hour or so and expecting miracles. Acceptance takes time to click in. It is a 24/7 therapy.

In the US, we call it Murphy’s Law, why? I don’t know but it does sum up the course that life takes, right down to dropping that piece of bread, and, of course, it would have to land butter side down, making a mess we have to deal with. I’m amazed at how the acceptance method has changed me, and so insidiously. I’m not yet nearing full recovery, and I still feel like myself, yet it’s the content of my thinking that has changed and the anxiety has slowly ebbed. I’ll compare it to the dawning of the morning, if you watch, you can’t see it happening, look away for a while and look again and there it is, you can see the light breakIng through. There are no big AHA! moments, nothing profound, just an insidious change that you only discover after you’ve stopped watching for a while and then look again. I’m finding the process very much as Dr Weekes described. And although we can’t see the change happening in the moment, it is nothing short of miraculous in the big picture. It just takes willingness to stick with it, develop patience and keep going with it. And just like the early morning, the light does start to dispel the darkness, our thoughts do change and our mental clarity starts to return, giving us the ability to think and “see” more clearly and rationally. I very much appreciate your input and support here. It’s been invaluable.

 

[Jonathan123]

• • • • • • • • • • (Sorry, can't lose the dots!).

Yes, it is like watching the dawn break. There is a poem used by Winston Churchill during WW2. 'Say Not The Struggle Naught Availeth'.


"Say not the struggle nought availeth,
The labour and the wounds are vain,
The enemy faints not, nor faileth,
And as things have been they remain.

If hopes were dupes, fears may be liars;
It may be, in yon smoke concealed,
Your comrades chase e'en now the fliers,
And, but for you, possess the field.

For while the tired waves, vainly breaking
Seem here no painful inch to gain,
Far back through creeks and inlets making,
Comes silent, flooding in, the main.

And not by eastern windows only,
When daylight comes, comes in the light,
In front the sun climbs slow, how slowly,
But westward, look, the land is bright."

Arthur Hugh Clough. 1855.

The tide comes in, no one can stop it. But if we stand impatiently waiting it never seems to arrive. In accepting EVERYTHING in life, not just anxiety, we take the stress out of it all. Acceptance does not weaken you, it gives you the strength to cope.

 

[Camden]

Now that I’ve been on an increase on my Luvox (antidepressant SSRI) for a month, I’ve noticed some minor improvements with my daily anxiety. I still have moments where I randomly feel very sad, and imagine how things could be different. It’s like I’m already grieving bad things that haven’t even happened yet.

Mother’s Day was a trigger for me yesterday. I’m blessed to say both of my parents are still alive and I get to spend lots of time with them. However, my mind wondered throughout the day and I daydreamed about when I’m much older and my mom passes away. I would be a day of grieving and sadness each Mother’s Day after that. I also thought about my grandparents whose parents have all passed away. I’m sure deep down they’re sad on Mother’s Day and Father’s Day.

I’ve still been feeling a little down today. I think about my brother getting married and living far away now and how our family unit is so different now. I woke up anxious like I often do on Monday mornings and I had an odd mix of anxiety about things that could go wrong this week, and sadness about how my anxiety is never going to go away and will enslave me forever. I felt so hopeless and trapped by my weekly cycles of anxiety today. It’s as if I’m already grieving imminent adversities like my parents dying, having issues at work, having a failed relationship/divorce, etc. I tend to feel sad when my infinity loop of anxiety takes over.

 

[Sweet T]

Camden, can you reframe this thinking to maybe think of how excited you are to go see your brother in his new location for example? What new adventures could you have there?
Change could be exciting.

 

[Jonathan123]

Hi. Camden Stop projecting future events. Live from day to day. No one knows what will happen tomorrow so enjoy the day, if you can. Life is a cycle of events. Birth and death being a mong them. We need to accept it all because there is not a thing we can do about it!
The past is gone, the future unknown. Now this is not being depressing but a fact. Of course we can plan ahead, but with the realisation that it can go wrong. 'The best laid plans of mice and men oft go awry' That great Scottish poet Robbie Burns said that and it's true.

 

[Camden]

Hi. Camden Stop projecting future events. Live from day to day. No one knows what will happen tomorrow so enjoy the day, if you can. Life is a cycle of events. Birth and death being a mong them. We need to accept it all because there is not a thing we can do about it!
The past is gone, the future unknown. Now this is not being depressing but a fact. Of course we can plan ahead, but with the realisation that it can go wrong. 'The best laid plans of mice and men oft go awry' That great Scottish poet Robbie Burns said that and it's true.

Great advice, thank you Jonathan123! It's been a while since I've gone down these negative paths. I really think my Lexapro is helping with my depressed thoughts. I have them less often, and so far I've been dealing with the Christmas season and the decreased daylight quite well.

 

[Matticus1983]

Hi all, I have my next doctor appointment in a few days. I need to talk to him about my medication dosages and how things have been going in general the past 8 weeks since I saw him last.

I’ve been feeling really “off” lately. A few things I’ve noticed within myself:

1. Having trouble falling asleep and then feeling tired the next morning.

2. Loss of interest in my hobbies. It takes a lot of willpower to bring myself to do things I like.

3. I feel impending doom all the time and think something bad and unexpected will happen every day.

4. On week nights I’m anxious to get to bed as early as possible to avoid appearing tired the next day.

5 I’ve felt really sad and concerned about some family members’ health issues. Once of which was just diagnosed with cancer.

6. I randomly have sad intrusive thoughts, such as a thought of a scene from a tear-jerking movie or a sad memory form my past.

7. Normal tasks like doing laundry, cooking, and going to visit friends all seem overwhelming and more demanding than I know they actually are.

8. I feel inadequate at work. I feel unappreciated and as if they’re going to look for reasons to complain about me and get me fired.

9. It’s hard for me to get excited about good things happening. I’d go as far as to say my ability to feel pleasure is decreasing.

Would a list like this be beneficial in my upcoming appointment? Are there other types of questions I can expect if we are discussing the possibility of depression?

Sorry there guy! I know all these feelings. I've felt them on and off for 20 plus years. You pretty much covered everything. It's good you have the clarity of thought and obviously are staying on top of it, thats the main thing! You'll get meds adjusted if you're taking them and alot of times it will help. I don't know If it's winter where you live but it doesn't help at all. Less sunlight = less seratonin. You may talk to him about an artificial sunlight lamp. I don't have one they're a little pricey but they can help as well. But what you are experiencing are the abnormal "normals" of depression and anxiety. God bless!