Summertime Woes

[AnnieMarie]

Does anyone else seem to feel overwhelmed in the summer instead of relaxed?

I know so many people who just relax and enjoy the summer with their friends and family. It's not that I don't enjoy it, but I just feel overwhelmed. I'm sure it is partly to do with taking summer classes this year and not having that "break" is so anticipated throughout the rest of the year. But my daughter has so many things she wants to do, birthday parties, swimming, amusement parks, fairs. You name it, she probably wants to do it. I just find it so hard to do some of these things. I have such a hard time with new experiences, even just going to a store or restaurant I haven't been to before, or barely go to, is a struggle sometimes. Taking my daughter to birthday parties with parents I don't know makes me, for lack of a better word, ANXIOUS. And we have 2 this weekend alone.

I guess lately it has been unusually hard. For the most part I just avoid situations that make me uncomfortable, or I make my husband go with me to make it slightly less uncomfortable. But lately I find myself having to do these things on my own.

My husband is as supportive as he can be. Bless his heart does he try. But he's never experienced any sort of anxiety so he can only do so much. I'm just curious if anyone else experiences this as well and what are some things that help you?

 

[janemariesayed]

You are so brave @AnnieMarie. And so strong to cope with your difficulties to care for your daughter. You should be really proud of yourself for coping in public with your anxieties when you feel the way you do. I say well done and a pat on the back for not allowing your condition to affect your daughters life. You are a kind and caring person.

Try to go with the flow of things. the summer will soon pass and it will be different again. Try to go with your husband as it will make it easier for you. Surely you wont be doing your classes every single day? So how about when you have a day off, to do something special on those days together as a family. That way, you will still feel like you have had a special treat even if you havent had the time for the usual break.

When I lived in Egypt we had a business and couldn't take time off. But every so often we would get a bus down to El Gouna and spend the day there then get the bus back in the evening. It felt like we had been on holiday. Once we reached El Gouna we would walk around the shops and go to the beach, then we would get a boat to Zeytouna island and sit by the beach all day. We would drink beer and eat a huge burger and chips or go to a fish restaurant that was there. Having a day out like that made us feel like we had had a complete break. My hubs even said it felt like he had been on holiday rather than just a day trip out. Doing this helped me immensly. It relieved us of the stress and anxieties of running a business. It also gave us a time out together which helped our relationship. You should still go out on dates, even after getting married or living together. If you did that you would find that you would do even more things as a couple too.

 

[Rinka]

I guess part of the difficulties with summer is, that there are so many expectation. People wait all autum, winter and spring for just a few weeks of summer. The summer must be perfect with lots of activities and fun fun fun.
But life does not work that way.
It might be helpful to write a schedule for activities? And also maybe manage the expectations. You do not have to be active the whole summer time. Relaxing in the garden or in cafes can be enough.

 

[Emma_s]

A schedule is a wonderful idea, I know I feel better when I'm organized. Set days for yourself as well, do things that will relax you. Summer doesn't have to be overwhelming. I know I certainly have to take time for myself, be alone for a few hours. I too admire you for doing that for your daughter, I know it's not easy. I find it's not a bad thing to try to do things you normally wouldn't. Hope you find a balance and enjoy your summer, you deserve it.

 

[Concernedgal]

Summertime sucks. I hate the heat, the humidity and the longer days even bother me. The heat is overwhelming to me. I am easily bothered by the heat, I will literally start to feel overwhelmed and anxious. And if out in it for longer than ten minutes. .. a panic attack is coming. I seriously hate summertime.

 

[janemariesayed]

All we have had is rain for the last few days. Loopy doesn't want to go out. She hates the rain and it's a problem to get her to go outside at all in this weather. Carly, on the other hand, is in and out every five minutes. It's raining and windy and a bit chilly. It's supposed to be summer! I love all the seasons and I'm having to check myself to not get S.A.D. Isn't that the lack of sun depression? Correct me if I am wrong. But I am really missing the sun these last few days.

I want to get outside in the garden. I want to trim the green out the front and the back. I've got two foot high weeds now. It is quite sweet though, I have one weed bang smack in the centre of my front garden that has a huge purple flower. Still, it will have to go as soon as it is dry. I try to appreciate every weather so it doesn't make me depressed. when it is wet and windy the birds don't sing as much either and I miss that too. These things help me with my anxieties so maybe bad weather does make me anxious after all!

 

[harijobs]

@AnnieMarie. It is good that you have shared how you feel here. We are all here to help you. There are times that I feel the same as you do but I have some tricks which help me to ease out my nerves and makes me feel relaxed. The first thing I say to myself that everything is going to be fine and I will motivate myself by saying that "You can do it, You are going to nail the situation. There is nothing you need to worry about." These phrases will give me the confidence to handle the situation in a calm way. Next, I will dress comfortably in my favorite clothes which make me feel confident. And sometimes I practice in the mirror when meeting new people. At first, I will be a bit shy to go and talk to new people and them I will slowly start with one. Then I will slowly expand into the group. So, @AnnieMarie don't lose your hope and worry yourself. I have the confidence that you are going to rock this summer. Good luck, my friend.

 

[AnnieMarie]

Thanks for all of the kind words and support everyone! My computer has been on the fritz the past few days and has refused to connect to the internet. But I think I have it figured out now. @Rinka and @Emma_s I have also gotten myself a HUGE desk calendar to hang on my wall to hopefully help organize this summer, so thanks for that guys! We do have a vacation planned for the end of July so I am just hoping that evens some things out. @harijobs I have been trying to motivate myself a lot more lately, I'm hoping that the more I say these things the easier it will be to believe them. Because right now, I'm just so overwhelmed I don't believe myself when I say I can do it, or it won't be so bad. Everything usually turns out OK, but it's getting there that's the struggle. Do you do this everyday or just when you're feeling anxious or nervous about something? I hope you all are enjoying your summer and I hope it brightens up for ya @janemariesayed and @Concernedgal i hope you get to cool down and relax! Do you have a pool or access to a pool? Swimming or even just sitting with my feet in the water and a book seems to help me on the hotter days, it's finding the time that's usually the problem.

 

[harijobs]

@AnnieMarie. Thank you. I hope you have a great summer. I say these words when I am feeling anxious the most. But sometimes I say these words just to motivate myself while doing something, during my work, before meeting a client, before starting a new project. I have my journal with me all day so I would record all the important moments in it. At the end of the day, I re-read them to see the areas where I need improvement. This method has helped me a lot. Hope you are doing good, my friend. Stay strong Good luck.

 

[janemariesayed]

There has hardly been any sun this last month. I can't believe we are in August already. I'm feeling pretty disappointed and low mood without being able to sit outside. I think the sun makes me feel better, I wish it would shine for me.