Struggling

[Brad66]

Triceps, About 10 years ago I was managing a large retail store. I spent 5 days a week working thru the aisles, etc. Prior to this, I had worked in a grocery store.. Now I (also) struggle (to varying degrees) in large retail buildings. I get dizzy and edgy.
I'm puzzled about what has changed in my mind and perceptions of large stores. Do u have any insight (?) It's an issue I'd like to conquer, in case I wanna return to retail management.. I can hardly grocery shop these days.

When I was at my worst I had issues with going to stores. I am over it now though, I still don't like going to them but I don't dred it.

It's just fear though, plain and simple. Fear can make the most menial tasks feel like climbing a mountain. Fear dictates your reaction and makes you believe there is something special going on when there isn't.

For me I just kept going and getting through it. My wife would make me go in with her even if I protested (God bless her for that) and eventually I stopped fearing it.

I would suggest maybe going on a Sunday morning or late a night when there isn't many people there. Also don't rush around in an attempt to get out of there. Pace yourself even if it's uncomfortable. Rushing is sending a message to the brain that it's correct about the situation. Slowing down will eventually lead to the anxiety passing. Another thing you could try is to set a 30-45 minute timer and don't allow yourself to check out until the time is up. That way you know you are already going to be there anyways and you can relax and pace yourself.

 

[triceps]

Hi He Man. I've given it some thought and come up with two of the difficulties for me in the retail environment. 1) too much stimulus from the lighting, number of people and interaction potential with them and 2) the decision making involved with shopping. Seemingly so many decisions whose importance I've inflated instead of just buying what I need and not agonizing over the price/oz. or whether we need that product.
Don't know how that might help but I'm pretty sure those are a couple reasons why shopping is so difficult for me. Trick is figuring out how to tackle, place less importance on those things so you can shop like other folk without anxiety.

 

[He Man]

I've given it some thought and come up with two of the difficulties for me in the retail environment. 1) too much stimulus from the lighting, number of people and interaction potential with them and 2) the decision making involved with shopping. Seemingly so many decisions whose importance I've inflated..
Don't know how that might help..

Trust.. your insights help a lot. I've spent a lot of time contemplating & experimenting w/my large store dizziness. I spent several years happily managing a large retail store, and it would be nice to know that if I ever wanna switch professions.. I could go back to retail employment. Right now I struggle with 20 minutes in the aisles, it would be hard (currently) to spend 40 hours there..
The bizarre part, my store dizziness happened seemingly overnight. About 3 years ago I went grocery shopping & felt like I was gonna tip over from dizziness.. got to the check out & felt my forehead tightening up and eyes closing.
Like Brad66 suggested, I force myself to go shopping, and get what I need done; but it sucks every time.. I'm not progressing toward/returning to normalcy. I appreciate other people's advice & insights bcuz with experimentation & advisement I'm optimistic it can/will be repaired..

 

[triceps]

Hi again He Man. Desensitization has never helped me with the many things I hesitate to do. Once a week I've been attending an AA meeting for the past 9 years. It's Tuesday, AA night and it doesn't matter how many times I've gone, I'm nervous right now about going.

 

[Avalanche1962]

Good morning everyone. Well I feel like I’m relapsing here. My mom has been in the hospital all week and it’s set me back. This is my worst morning yet. Headache. I’m assuming stress headache. I’m just out of it today. I don’t want to do anything. I don’t want to go back to the hospital. My wife had to go outta town today. It’s like the ball just keeps rolling and nothing is giving In. I’ve been on my lexapro 3-1/2 weeks. And my buspar 1-1/2. I thought it was starting to work. But I’m not sure what happened. Maybe it’s all the stress. Please say a prayer for me. This is miserable.

 

[Avalanche1962]

Good morning. Just wanting to chat today. Need some much needed comfort. I am a train wreck. I dont know what has happened. I though I was on the mend a little. My mom got home from the hospital yesterday and she just isn't doing that great. She have congestive heart failure and a-Fib. With fluid build up on her lungs looks like we will be in and out of the hospital ever two to three months based on her fluid increase. I am a jittery anxious mess. I hate to see the sun come up because as I said in earlier post, mornings are really bad for me. Im crying every morning and having to force myself to get up and go to work. I hate this. Its a terrible way to live. Ive been on my Lexapro now for almost 4 weeks and buspar twice a day for 2-1/2. Maybe it just hasn't had time. But I wish it would hurry up. I try and push through it. but its a struggle. Will this medicine ever kick in? I just feel like Ive relapsed here. I think its turned into anxiety plus depression and stress all rolled into one. I never thought Id ever be this way. Its scary. All my blood work is good. Nothing underlaying there. Thank goodness. I just need someone who is or has gone through this same thing to talk to.

 

[Brad66]

Other than waiting on the medicine to start working are you doing anything else to help with the stress? Exercising, meditation, etc?

 

[Avalanche1962]

not really other than just trying to relax.

 

[Brad66]

You really should start trying to exercise daily to help with the stress. You are in a situation where being stressed is understandable but you also need to find ways to handle it in a healthier way.

Anything you are doing to try and think the stress away will only make it worse. Distractions can help but they need to be healthy ones and can't come at the expense of your responsibilities.

Exercise is the best of both worlds. Even a brisk walk around your neighborhood will help. And if you stick with it daily it will help you feel more in control and confident too.

 

[Avalanche1962]

thank you I will give that a try.