Scared and I’m trying to not freak out in front of kids ☹️

[Giarose25]

I have been on here before with severe physical symptoms that had me convinced I have MS. I made myself have so many different very real scary symptoms that I was devastated from fear. I saw a neurologist who reassured me so many times I do not have MS. Now two years later(yes I have been stressed lately). What started with leg pain the other day has lead to spaced out disoriented feeling, lots of head pressure To the point it feels like I can not talk. Shaking facial numbness and I’m trying to tell myself I am overwhelmed. But here I am with my two kids trying not to cry and become panicked. I feel crazy. I was diagnosed with ocd when I was going through my “health scare” because I was so scared that I did not sleep for almost four days straight so I went to a crisis center for an evaluation. I went home the same day, and I was taught about the ocd and how I can have intrusive thoughts that make me obsess with worry and I learned to love with it. Not perfectly but begin to understand I think differently. I’ve had a lot going on down to betrayal from a very close friend today. So I understand I could be stressed but I feel head pressure, dizzy, numbness and nausea and my husband came home and i went to the bathroom to sit on the floor and just cry in my bathroom. I’m trying so hard not to be scared and think the worst or feel like ong maybe I do have something and its a “flare up”. Having scared myself so bad the last time I also feel nothing I feel gets taken too seriously so i don’t know when it’s an emergency or not. I feel very alone and sad and scared right now.

 

[kammie72]

I have these same fears. A neurologist has told you you do not have MS. I look at Christina Applegate - if you had it you’d know. She says there were early signs, and I know you’re thinking, “well, these could be these early signs. It’s hard to diagnose in the beginning.” I look at Christina, unable to walk, unable to wear shoes, and think, how unfair for those who MS and other debilitating diseases. Then I get on my treadmill and remember a trainer’s mantra about exercise when you don’t feel like it: “you don’t have to do this, you GET to do this.” I have had MS fears for about 25 years. During that time, my stepmother was diagnosed with MS, and subsequently died from the symptoms that came from her abuse of pain meds. She died 10 years ago last month and I was somewhat cured of my MS anxiety watching her journey. Somewhat! But I’ve been where you are - crying in the bathroom so my kids can’t see, overextended, worried. Anxiety symptoms mimic MS and when you become anxious everything snowballs and you get what feel like all the symptoms. I think when people say they had some early signs and ignored them, they felt them fiercely, not perhaps as we do because we’re over-analyzing every twinge. If you have seen a neurologist and these symptoms aren’t disruptive (because then I would go back for further testing), try - try- to tell yourself this is anxiety at work. I know it’s hard!

 

[Nano22]

I have also had the fear of MS. I went through so much testing for years.

My therapist told me I have Conversion Disorder. With CD your anxiety turns into neurological symptoms.

After learning that, my symptoms lessened. My fear of MS has greatly diminished.

 

[Giarose25]

I have these same fears. A neurologist has told you you do not have MS. I look at Christina Applegate - if you had it you’d know. She says there were early signs, and I know you’re thinking, “well, these could be these early signs. It’s hard to diagnose in the beginning.” I look at Christina, unable to walk, unable to wear shoes, and think, how unfair for those who MS and other debilitating diseases. Then I get on my treadmill and remember a trainer’s mantra about exercise when you don’t feel like it: “you don’t have to do this, you GET to do this.” I have had MS fears for about 25 years. During that time, my stepmother was diagnosed with MS, and subsequently died from the symptoms that came from her abuse of pain meds. She died 10 years ago last month and I was somewhat cured of my MS anxiety watching her journey. Somewhat! But I’ve been where you are - crying in the bathroom so my kids can’t see, overextended, worried. Anxiety symptoms mimic MS and when you become anxious everything snowballs and you get what feel like all the symptoms. I think when people say they had some early signs and ignored them, they felt them fiercely, not perhaps as we do because we’re over-analyzing every twinge. If you have seen a neurologist and these symptoms aren’t disruptive (because then I would go back for further testing), try - try- to tell yourself this is anxiety at work. I know it’s hard!

Thank you for this response I had no idea anyone had responded at all! I actually came back on because I started getting these weird body tremors which ofc are scaring me. But I once again have been very stressed lately, I am not as hysterical as I normally get(for me this is big) trying hard not to fight this and just understand I am having a rough few days and not sleeping well. It’s hard not to feel crazy sometimes but I do. I’ve done such a good job at coping since my original scare in 2019, then I have these random moments and I don’t know whether to be scared or frustrated because I feel truly crazy or like I can’t tell reality and what I’m actually feeling. Thank you so so much for that long msg, I may be late reading it but it brought me comfort in this moment and stopped me from posting another scared moment. This forum really is a nice safe space.

I have also had the fear of MS. I went through so much testing for years.

My therapist told me I have Conversion Disorder. With CD your anxiety turns into neurological symptoms.

After learning that, my symptoms lessened. My fear of MS has greatly diminished.

I have not heard of that! That brings some peace at mind, I looked it up and definitely makes sense. I can hyper focus so much that I’m surprised I can’t make myself levitate if I wanted to ‍. I calmed down after my last post and I had no idea that anyone responded and I came back today and this was really nice to read and out my mind at ease tonight. I’ve been the last two day with some body trembling more like a anxious jittery feeling throughout my whole body and I can’t help but focus on it. I am trying to keep busy!

 

[MATD]

Dr ClIre Weekes developed a method for anxiety recovery. I highly recommend it and can vouch for it being effective.