Past Experiences That Lead To Your Current Anxious State

[Choochoo]

I know it is not healthy to self diagnose but mental therapy as an industry is non existent in my area so I have always just been left to trace the root causes of my behavior on my own, and  even though I know it may not be the most accurate method I just tend to take solace in at least having a general idea and also being able to talk it out or discuss it even just online, I think helps a bit in providing some comfort.


That said, when it comes to my anxiety I think mine stems a lot from growing up in a family that was always quick to judge, and also very easily rattled in the way that even small problems were emphasized so much that it felt way bigger than it was supposed to be. Now that I am an adult I feel like those behaviors have been passed onto me as I always feel like I'm being judged in the same way that my family always mocked or made fun of others so easily and also whenever I come across any problem I tend to blow it up too now as if it were huge. I try to correct it whenever I see myself indulging in this behavior but I feel as though my programming is a bit too ingrained in my being at this point for me to reverse it without a lot of time and effort. 


What about you guys, can you trace where your current behaviors stem from? Let's share and discuss our experiences here and hopefully it will be at the very least a bit therapeutic to get those thoughts out and also read about others stories and experiences. 

 

[sidney]

My family never made me feel anxious despite our numerous arguments and shouting matches, but from what I have noticed, I only feel that way when it comes to being the victim of some malicious and slanderous gossip, since you aren't really in a position to explain to each and every person the truth because it would be too awkward to just approach the person in question, like someone you only know by face and name to explain everything, right? But luckily, that certain feeling subsides quickly in me.

 

[Alex]

I can trace back to the roots of it all, but the only way to deal with it is often to change your perception as if it involves others, you can't always change them or get them to see what they did.


Family and your environment when you are growing up does matter, because a child may absorb it all and then it all comes out later on. Children do notice and remember things. My parents try to deny what happened, as they never thought I would remember, but I did.

 

[fuzyon]

Blushing definitely comes from middle school for me, I liked a girl and my best friend "spilled the beans" and everyone in my class found out. Everytime she would enter the classroom my classmates were giving me snarky stares and my face always went full-on red. I wish that didn't happen, it would make talking with people so much easier nowadays but I've come to terms with it.

 

[111kg]

But of course our past experiences, good or bad, defines the way we react to certain emotions. My father used to bully me a lot and now, although I learned to defend myself, my hands are always shaking when I am in a confrontational situation. I will always hate him and will never forgive him for what he has done to me.

 

[DDNatureLover]

I can definitely trace my anxiety and depression to incidents that occurred during childhood. As an adult, especially one living in very challenging circumstances, I can see what caused some of the behaviors I experienced from others, particularly my mother, and I can excuse some, but not all of them. Of course everything I've been through since I've been independent has also had an impact, so I'm not that same person, but I do think for the most part, we carry bits and pieces of how we grew up with us. 

 

[DylanRowan]

Probably both kindgarten and elementary school. I was bullied during my 3rd year in kindergarten. I mean c'mon. Badly raised kids were being annoying with me every day. I only lasted 1 month at that school. I went to another one, and it was a radical change from what I lived. Elementary school was something really weird now that I look back. I started my first 2 years being super happy. Something changed in 3rd year when I gained access to a page called Newgrounds (It still lives to this day). That page really changed a lot of my perspectives, and I became really annoying and seemed like I was a different person. 4th year was absolutely awful. I had changed from how I behave in 3rd year, but it seemed like I needed my behavior from 3rd year to be happy in 4th grade. Other kids came in and changed the status quo of the school. 5th and 6th year were the same, but deep inside, I felt left out of everything the class was doing. I never accepted it in the exterior, but I felt that deep inside. By the way, the classrooms consisted of around 10-5 students.

 

[clair02]

I know that a lot of people believe that the best way to deal with anxiety over something that happened in the past is to revisit the incident, dig really deep and reveal whatever emotions are locked up in there, but I beg to differ. I think that by doing so, we are keeping the source of our anxiety alive and prolonging the disorder. I think it's usually best to let the dead bury the dead and move on and try our best to focus on better things in our lives. Easier said than done... I know. 

 

[Laneorexorcist]

I think that the only behaviour that it has sort of a past on my life is the fact that I am extremely anxious about getting on the subway because I was assaulted there about a year ago, so it hasn't been even a long time. And also... when I was in 5th grade I was scared by a teacher with a bug... and since that day I can't watch a bug without feeling physically bad and starting to hear white noises. 

 

[John Snort]

It's the way I was raised that ended with me suffering from anxiety. My parents never let me play with other children in our neighborhood and I had to go to school with arrogant little snobs I couldn't relate to and I was also discriminated against. Here was a kid from a middle class family in a private school for the wealthy folks kids.It was the teachers who didn't like it. I reminded them too much of the life they were trying to claw their way out of. All I endured is something I've never fully recovered from.

 

[amy88]

A couple of things for me - my mom was depressed or bipolar (definitely had some issues there) and she really wasn't a very nice mom...always lashing out and things like that, so I always felt like I needed to shut up and get out of her way to avoid being yelled at...and I was also bullied at school. Both of those led to me feeling like I wasn't valuable as a person, that my opinions didn't matter, and things like that...so I think those are the major contributing factors.