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Pain and anxiety...

Hurt&Hopeful

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#1
Spoiler alert - This is just a gripe post. I'm having a hard time since having knee surgery a little over a week ago. I was healing well, and then a couple of days ago the swelling came back, and I've been pretty miserable ever since. I can't sleep right, and I can't move around the way I'm supposed to because my knee and shin swell so much. So tonight the anxiety is bad. How can I deal with the anxiety if I'm in constant pain, stuck laying or sitting with my leg up 24/7, and not sleeping? I just feel like I'm heading for a crash if I don't get some relief.
 

triceps

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#2
Spoiler alert. You're going to get some relief soon. I think the biggest threat for your anxiety is the loss of sleep. That really takes away the energy to battle your entire situation. Try to do whatever you can to get comfortable enough to sleep and any sleep you get will help in two ways. One, you'll be in better shape to deal with the pain and anxiety and two, it will burn up time towards the further healing. Really, you're past the worst and time is the only thing you've got to speed up somehow ( by sleeping, not just setting your watch forward) to allow the healing and hence, pain reduction. Hang in there my friend,
 

Rosy

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#3
wish I could help but I am not up to it either. For the past week I have had anxiety attacks. Only have about 4 hrs in between attacks. Even at night. I have white coat syndrome and have an appmt on Monday with my psychiatrist and don't know if that is it or not. Racking my brain thinking what could have brought it on. I sure hope your pain and swelling goes away. I'll keep checking in.
 

triceps

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#4
wish I could help but I am not up to it either. For the past week I have had anxiety attacks. Only have about 4 hrs in between attacks. Even at night. I have white coat syndrome and have an appmt on Monday with my psychiatrist and don't know if that is it or not. Racking my brain thinking what could have brought it on. I sure hope your pain and swelling goes away. I'll keep checking in.
Hi Rosy. I probably average 2 full-blown panic attacks a week and have never figured out what triggers them for me. I can be having a very high anxiety day (like yesterday) and not have an attack. Or, I can be having one of my best days and have it ruined by an attack right out of the blue. They come for me at anytime, morning, mid-day, when I go to bed or will wake me in the middle of the night. Monday is a long way off so give it your best to try not to think about it. My psychiatrist, I truly believe, gets a kick out of how worked up I get just over our 15 min. sessions every six months. So it's easy for me to say think about something else but I worry for a week before my appointment. At least today you've got water.
 

Rosy

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#5
Hi Rosy. I probably average 2 full-blown panic attacks a week and have never figured out what triggers them for me. I can be having a very high anxiety day (like yesterday) and not have an attack. Or, I can be having one of my best days and have it ruined by an attack right out of the blue. They come for me at anytime, morning, mid-day, when I go to bed or will wake me in the middle of the night. Monday is a long way off so give it your best to try not to think about it. My psychiatrist, I truly believe, gets a kick out of how worked up I get just over our 15 min. sessions every six months. So it's easy for me to say think about something else but I worry for a week before my appointment. At least today you've got water.
thank you for answering. I thought i was the only one to have an attack for no particular reason at the time. I have free floating anxiety. I guess that is what that means. And maybe it is my appmt. that is causing it. I thought since it is on Monday it would be too early for me to have this. lol And yes at least I have water to take my pills that don't seem to work right now. I'm even blaming this on pills. I take lorazepam 2 1/2 mg. a day and thought maybe I should be on more but too afraid more would be too much. Thank you Tricepts. I hope one day soon both of us get relief from these attacks. My dr. wants me to try talk sessions with one of his associates. I don't know.
 

Hurt&Hopeful

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#6
thank you for answering. I thought i was the only one to have an attack for no particular reason at the time. I have free floating anxiety. I guess that is what that means. And maybe it is my appmt. that is causing it. I thought since it is on Monday it would be too early for me to have this. lol And yes at least I have water to take my pills that don't seem to work right now. I'm even blaming this on pills. I take lorazepam 2 1/2 mg. a day and thought maybe I should be on more but too afraid more would be too much. Thank you Tricepts. I hope one day soon both of us get relief from these attacks. My dr. wants me to try talk sessions with one of his associates. I don't know.
Oh SO sorry you're going through this. That sounds completely exhausting. I knqow I'm not a doctor, but I really wonder if am SSRI might help even it out a bit. It really did for me. Will you keep us posted?
 

Hurt&Hopeful

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#7
Spoiler alert. You're going to get some relief soon. I think the biggest threat for your anxiety is the loss of sleep. That really takes away the energy to battle your entire situation. Try to do whatever you can to get comfortable enough to sleep and any sleep you get will help in two ways. One, you'll be in better shape to deal with the pain and anxiety and two, it will burn up time towards the further healing. Really, you're past the worst and time is the only thing you've got to speed up somehow ( by sleeping, not just setting your watch forward) to allow the healing and hence, pain reduction. Hang in there my friend,
Yep, hit the nail on the head. It's the sleep deprivation that is getting me. I hate sleeping on my back,and I can ONLY lay on my back with my leg wrapped and straightened. At night I just struggle until I crash - been after 1am for the past several nights. Then I have a small child waking me up early, and a full time job during the day (I'm working from home). I need to schedule some naps. Lol Because when work is over, husband and child are also home, and I'm doing the best I can. Husband is also in graduate school...whew. We're work out. Last night had a couple of mild(ish) panic attacks.

Goal tonight is to try to crash a little earlier and knock myself out somehow. I'm about to head to a post-op checkup, so hopefully he can do something to help with swelling. It will get better. I know it will. Just don't want a big relapse here...I've been doing so well for the past couple of months.
 

triceps

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#8
Hi Rosy. Free floating anxiety is the same as Generalized Anxiety Disorder. We happen to have panic disorder along with it. My psychiatrist (now retired but will still take a call from me if needed, or so he says, but I've never called him) was an anxiety specialist. The Upjohn Company hired him to head up the initial field trials of Xanax a long, long time ago. His attitude for me was basically "You've got generalized anxiety, a brain imbalance that you probably inherited from your mother. There is no therapy that can eliminate it, no current medication that can cure it. You can lessen the symptoms with CBT and other relaxation therapies and with medication. You're the only one that can determine how debilitating it will be for you, how much you want to push yourself past the symptoms." I went to him for over 20 years and never had an appointment last more than 15 minutes except for the very first one. Most sessions were more of the "How's the family" type stuff and a short discussion about how my medications were working.
So don't feel bad about worrying about Monday's appointment. It didn't matter for me that I knew exactly how those appointments would go, I was a basket case before each one of them and just fine once I got there.
 

Rosy

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#9
Thank you Triceps and Hurt&Hopeful. I kinda thought that was generalized anxiety. Oh well can't do more than I am now. About 2 yrs ago my Dr tried to take me off nortriptyline and put me on SSRI's I tried 4 different drugs and could not take them. For one thing I could not pee. lol Excuse the language. lol Had trouble with withdrawal.
So I stayed on the nortriptyline at a lower dose. I am on lorazepam and I take a beta blocker. I'll let you know how my appmt. goes on Monday if I survive it. lol I only see him for about 15 min. too Triceps. Do you see another Dr now?
 

triceps

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#10
Thank you Triceps and Hurt&Hopeful. I kinda thought that was generalized anxiety. Oh well can't do more than I am now. About 2 yrs ago my Dr tried to take me off nortriptyline and put me on SSRI's I tried 4 different drugs and could not take them. For one thing I could not pee. lol Excuse the language. lol Had trouble with withdrawal.
So I stayed on the nortriptyline at a lower dose. I am on lorazepam and I take a beta blocker. I'll let you know how my appmt. goes on Monday if I survive it. lol I only see him for about 15 min. too Triceps. Do you see another Dr now?
Hi Rosy. I just go to my family doctor who is nice enough to renew my Lexapro (ever try Lexapro?) and Klonopin which is like your lorazepam, without my having to see him every six months. I've been able to pee just fine on the Lexapro but the last couple years the prostate seems to control the frequency and has made me into a dribbler. Ah, getting old is fun isn't it?
 

Rosy

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#11
Hi Rosy. I just go to my family doctor who is nice enough to renew my Lexapro (ever try Lexapro?) and Klonopin which is like your lorazepam, without my having to see him every six months. I've been able to pee just fine on the Lexapro but the last couple years the prostate seems to control the frequency and has made me into a dribbler. Ah, getting old is fun isn't it?
My husband has that trouble too. He has to cath himself every day. Yes growing old is so much fun. lol lol Lexapro was also a no go for me. My Dr. says I am just one of those people who have trouble with SSRI's That's good your dr. will do that. My son took one of those and was okay on it. My daughter-in-law I think takes lexapro or did. She has a little trouble peeing but I don't think it was that bad. Mr husband said to tell you he takes 3 Terazosin HCL 2 mgs each every night. If he doesn't take it he dribbles. It is supposed to be good for your heart also.
 

Hurt&Hopeful

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#12
Hi Rosy. I just go to my family doctor who is nice enough to renew my Lexapro (ever try Lexapro?) and Klonopin which is like your lorazepam, without my having to see him every six months. I've been able to pee just fine on the Lexapro but the last couple years the prostate seems to control the frequency and has made me into a dribbler. Ah, getting old is fun isn't it?
Try childbirth. ;) Never. the. same.
 

Hurt&Hopeful

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#13
I just got home from my follow-up appointment. Doctor says the knee looks good, and that the swelling is from some of the work they did on my meniscus, which I won't go into here because it was extremely gross. :D So I will just have to ride that out - it will get better over time. I still can't use my thigh muscles, but I managed to sort of "activate them" and get them jumping a bit for him. Bizarre stuff. I have the green light to start physical therapy, so I will call about that in the morning. @triceps I took your advice and came straight home and went to bed, which is where I am now, hiding out from my husband and child. I will have to get up in a bit because I have a grad school paper to proofread (my husband is not a native English speaker, so he needs a second pair of eyes on everything), and a derby car to make out of a cardboard box with my son. But I will try to at least lay here and relax and let some pain meds kick in for an hour or so first.

When I get my anxiety triggered, I sometimes don't have panic attacks, but I have this full body trembling. Everything just SHAKES, from head to toe. It looks and feels really weird. That's happening now because I've just reached my limit of exhaustion, but I'm in too much pain to sleep.
 

Rosy

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#14
I get the shakes too sometimes. Usually it is inward and you can't see it but I sure feel it. lol Glad to hear you can do PT now. Be prepared to hurt and keep that ice handy. lol I had to have PT after a fractured leg on my knee. So glad you are healing nice.
 

triceps

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#15
I get the shakes too sometimes. Usually it is inward and you can't see it but I sure feel it. lol Glad to hear you can do PT now. Be prepared to hurt and keep that ice handy. lol I had to have PT after a fractured leg on my knee. So glad you are healing nice.
Hi Rosy. I have those same kind of internal shakes every morning. Makes me very unsure of myself during them. Please thank your husband for his medical advice. Hopefully it might delay the catheter route for a few years, not looking forward to that. Do they have them in galvanized pipe size? There's alot of commercials on tv for them, trying to take advantage of us seniors with medicare.
 

Rosy

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#16
Hi Rosy. I have those same kind of internal shakes every morning. Makes me very unsure of myself during them. Please thank your husband for his medical advice. Hopefully it might delay the catheter route for a few years, not looking forward to that. Do they have them in galvanized pipe size? There's alot of commercials on tv for them, trying to take advantage of us seniors with medicare.
I thanked my husband for you. lol He said it isn't that hard to get used to and hopes you don't have to go that route. Those shakes are awful. I get them often and really don't know how to describe it. But you are aware of your whole body and sometimes it feels something is moving under your skin. ugh. We just got back from the eye Dr. My husband had to have macular degenerative disorder checked for his eyes. I feel like I have put in a whole day. I hope both of us have a good day.
 

Hurt&Hopeful

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#17
@Rosy @triceps Yes, those shakes are kind of constant. It's only when it gets really bad that it's visible and crazy. But there is always that little nervous shakiness inside...Triceps, I also hope you don't have to go that route, but I've known others that have, and they get through it. Just a hassle...

Just an update - today, for the first time, I was not in too much pain, and I was able to walk a little with my brace on and crutches. I was able to go to my son's school for a parent/teacher conference (with help), and be in other parts of the house a little more (not the bedroom). So it was a was little bit of a foray back into normal life. I am more exhausted than I have ever been. lol I'm feeling grateful, and also anxious and overwhelmed by how much stuff there is to be done, and how much of it I still can't do. But getting there slowly.
 
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#18
Way to go H&H...and don't worry too much about stuff to be done, it has a way of piling up even if we stay at it!

Glad you're feeling better, they say time will heal all, but sometimes it seems like forever!
 

Hurt&Hopeful

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#19
Way to go H&H...and don't worry too much about stuff to be done, it has a way of piling up even if we stay at it!

Glad you're feeling better, they say time will heal all, but sometimes it seems like forever!
Aw, thanks, @guitarman65 . Appreciate the good thoughts. I've been basically in bed for three weeks, unable to move much, so the anxiety builds... You know, it's weird, but having a limb out of commission really makes me anxious. I had a checkup yesterday, and the doctor had me laying on my back, and had my try to just lift my leg off the table a bit. I couldn't do it. My brain couldn't find the muscles. I KNOW it's because of the trauma in the surgery, and that the swelling makes the nerves sort of shut down. And I KNOW that the muscles are still there, and with rehab will work again once the swelling goes down. But it FREAKED. ME. OUT. I had to talk myself down on the way home, and remember that over the next few weeks/months it will get back to normal. It made me think of people that actually go through severe physical trauma, though - what must it be like to actually lose a limb, or have a stroke and lose functioning...I'm blessed that this is only temporary. I'll get through it. I AM getting through it.
 
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#20
I passed on my knee surgery years back, and i wish now i had elected to have it, so u got one on me! Im glad u seem to be able to understand your anxiety and how it affects your knee rehab. I can only imagine how giving a brain command to a leg, and it not responding must have felt like. I can see how it must have freaked u out! You seem to have handled it as good or better than most :)

Continue the good fight, cause we both know it will be worth it! GREAT job :)
 
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