Not sure how much more i can take

[Hatemyself]

I'm new to this forum. I normally don't like talking on forums but I in need of help. All through out school i been bullied and I had no friends nor a girlfriend and I been abused at home. I am 25 now and I just have nothing to live for everyone hates me and I am starting to hate myself.

 

[triceps]

What is your current living and employment situation?

 

[AMcSwain]

Don't say that... I know it can feel like everything is just falling apart and no one is there for you but it will get better.. Don't hate yourself. Love yourself. I may not know you personally but everyone is different and just because some jerks from school or even at home cant see how awesome you are doesn't mean you just need to give up. Do you work or anything?

 

[LostMyWay]

I can relate all too well. I'm 35 now, my only friends are online and I too have never had a girlfriend. I've never been physically abused, though my parents would give me some verbal abuse which really got in my head. I was bullied in school, though I got to a point where I would fight back and I mean physically fight. These last couple of years I've felt that I had no reason to live, and I absolutely hate myself. I try and reach out to people online just to make another friend or two, but most of the time no one replies or when they do they just stop replying anyway. When you have no real friends and no one around you seems to care then it makes things so much worse.

I wish I could give you some advice that would help, but I'm to a point where I don't think I could help anyone even though I wish I could. I can be someone you can talk to if you would like, you can message me if you want. I think I will send you one anyway.

 

[triceps]

I can relate all too well. I'm 35 now, my only friends are online and I too have never had a girlfriend. I've never been physically abused, though my parents would give me some verbal abuse which really got in my head. I was bullied in school, though I got to a point where I would fight back and I mean physically fight. These last couple of years I've felt that I had no reason to live, and I absolutely hate myself. I try and reach out to people online just to make another friend or two, but most of the time no one replies or when they do they just stop replying anyway. When you have no real friends and no one around you seems to care then it makes things so much worse.

I wish I could give you some advice that would help, but I'm to a point where I don't think I could help anyone even though I wish I could. I can be someone you can talk to if you would like, you can message me if you want. I think I will send you one anyway.

Your post above is very helpful. Don't sell yourself short. You never know what advice or shared experience will be a turning point for someone.

 

[LostMyWay]

Your post above is very helpful. Don't sell yourself short. You never know what advice or shared experience will be a turning point for someone.

Don't worry, I sell myself at around 6 foot 5 so I'm not appearing to be short...

Seriously though, I do like to share my problems and experience with others in case it will help them in any way. I hate knowing that others have to struggle with the same sort of things that I have, or just struggle for any reason at all. The reason I say that I feel I can't help is because I know so many people are looking for something specific to help them in their problems, and I know I can't provide that kind of help. I want to help people, I wish I could just take away everyone's pain so they can be free from it and be happy, though I know that isn't possible. If I can make a difference for even one person, no matter how big or small of a difference it may be I still want to try.

 

[Hatemyself]

What is your current living and employment situation?

Alone I work but I don't talk to anyone there

 

[Hatemyself]

Don't say that... I know it can feel like everything is just falling apart and no one is there for you but it will get better.. Don't hate yourself. Love yourself. I may not know you personally but everyone is different and just because some jerks from school or even at home cant see how awesome you are doesn't mean you just need to give up. Do you work or anything?

Yes I work as a dishwasher but no cares about me there so I just do my job and get out.

 

[triceps]

I had a few dish washing jobs and I liked each of them. Once you get the system down, you're able to think about other things while getting the job done. It's great but also can be a curse on bad days. Do you get many visitors or would you be able to handle having a good roomate?

 

[AMcSwain]

Yes I work as a dishwasher but no cares about me there so I just do my job and get out.

I am really sorry to hear that you are going through this.. I wish there was something I could say to make you feel better but I am on this site pretty much all day so if you ever need someone to talk to just send me a message.

 

[Hatemyself]

I had a few dish washing jobs and I liked each of them. Once you get the system down, you're able to think about other things while getting the job done. It's great but also can be a curse on bad days. Do you get many visitors or would you be able to handle having a good roomate?

Right now I live with a few family but I have not told them about my problems

 

[Ann1984]

I have felt like you many, many times in my life, although I was actually never alone (I had at least one friend and a sister). Feeling like you have no one and being bullied is really painful.
The only thing I can advise which can help you (at the same time the scariest thing) is to find group psychotherapy (particularly one with people with similar problem). I am certain that if you go at least for few months (and if you can keep on going for a year) you will find help and at least one friend.

 

[Hatemyself]

I have felt like you many, many times in my life, although I was actually never alone (I had at least one friend and a sister). Feeling like you have no one and being bullied is really painful.
The only thing I can advise which can help you (at the same time the scariest thing) is to find group psychotherapy (particularly one with people with similar problem). I am certain that if you go at least for few months (and if you can keep on going for a year) you will find help and at least one friend.

I don't think I can get myself to go I can't even get myself out the house for anything but going to work paying Bill's and getting food

 

[triceps]

Have you confided about your anxiety to anyone at work? It's great you're able to work. I had to retire due to my anxiety.

 

[Hurt&Hopeful]

I'm new to this forum. I normally don't like talking on forums but I in need of help. All through out school i been bullied and I had no friends nor a girlfriend and I been abused at home. I am 25 now and I just have nothing to live for everyone hates me and I am starting to hate myself.

Hi there - it sounds like you have had a really rough time, and that maybe you've been TAUGHT to hate yourself. I have been there. And it can get better - you are worthy of love, no matter where you are, where you've been, or what you think you've done or not done. Hang in there - you are strong, and with time and help, you will get through this!

 

[Hatemyself]

Hi there - it sounds like you have had a really rough time, and that maybe you've been TAUGHT to hate yourself. I have been there. And it can get better - you are worthy of love, no matter where you are, where you've been, or what you think you've done or not done. Hang in there - you are strong, and with time and help, you will get through this!

Have you confided about your anxiety to anyone at work? It's great you're able to work. I had to retire due to my anxiety.

I never decided to tell them at work about my anxiety

 

[Ann1984]

I don't think I can get myself to go I can't even get myself out the house for anything but going to work paying Bill's and getting food

I'm sorry to hear that your anxiety is so severe that you can't even go out. For me it was so hard to start group therapy, but I believed that was only helpful solution, so I risked feeling even worse the first few meeting because I couldn't find relief in something else. What do you believe that can help you? Maybe for beginning buy kindle edition from amazon for most reviewed books on social anxiety/avoidance behavior.

 

[Gingerninja1991]

I would suggest speaking to a trained councillor/therapist you can do phone sessions or at home sessions to help unlock why you feel how you do. These people are there to help they have post doctoral degrees in how to give you the right tools to get better, which you won’t get on a forum. It’s never easy trying to put yourself back together and after what you’ve been through you should be proud that you have pushed through, kept going and can reach out for help on forums. The next step is getting advice from a GP or therapist so you can make long term positive changes through medically recognised techniques. You can also call Samaritans or other hotlines to speak to people about what’s troubling you over the phone.


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[Hatemyself]

Update: I'm not sure what to do anymore everyone I try to meet stops talking to and likes to talk about me behind my back it makes me not want to leave my room and I can't get sleep cause the thoughts running through my mind why does everyone hate me I dont know what to do anymore.

 

[triceps]

I'd start by talking with the closest family member you're living with. It's great that you've been trying to talk with others, so sorry that hasn't worked out too well thusfar. Thanks for the update.