Hello all. I have sever anxiety. I didn't know what was wrong with me for years. I chalked it up to just being hyper. I decided to post here because for the first time in over 20 years I feel normal and I wanted to share my happiness. I feel like I can actually accomplish something now.
I have always been told that I was hyper or fast paced. I think I was just letting my anxiety control me. Whatever was different about me, I accepted it as who I was. I have always been clumsy around the opposite sex or people of authority. When asking a woman out for a date, I would always trip and fall or stutter to the point that I gave up on asking girls out completely. I would resort to chatting online and meeting new people there, as my anxiety was always dormant when I was alone. I had some legal trouble quite a few years ago that required me to attend court once a month and this lasted for 2 years before it was all over. The thought of not knowing what was going to happen each time I went, for those two years really put my anxiety in overdrive. I gave up emotionally as anxiety continued to grow and grow inside me. Anxiety took a firm grip on my body and It was taking over.
I finally learned what triggered my anxiety. I tried my best to avoid certain situations. I was sure I was going to have a heart attack or stroke. Going out in public to the store or gas station was horrible. A stranger walking up to me to ask for directions would make my heart race. Getting a phone call would cause me to shake uncontrollably as I didn't know who or why someone would be calling me. I always thought the worst. I would tell myself that this was a phone call telling me something bad was going to happen or is going to happen. When I would go for job interviews I would freeze when asked questions. My anxiety was debilitating and severe. I used illegal drugs for a while, (marijuana). I'm not going to lie. It helped me. I was always zoned out and stoned. My anxiety was still there but just toned down a notch. I used pot to escape everything all together. I was alone in my own little world even if I was out in public. ANXIETY IS HORRIBLE.
I found out about my anxiety by accident. Searching my symptoms and talking to people with anxiety led me to conclude that I did in fact have it. A few weeks ago I went to my wife's general doctor and noticed a sign on the door. : We are not a pain clinic, we don't give out opoids. We give antibiotics, stitch up cuts, take blood pressure and treat anxiety, blood pressure, high cholesterol. If your looking for pain pills your at the wrong place. One word stood out for me. ... .
I went in and seen a doctor and told him of my story and he told me he would help me. He gave me a prescription of buspirone. The first time I took a dose it was instant relief. I could not believe how calm I was. How all my nervousness was gone. How now I actually wanted to go out in public because for the first time I could talk to someone without stuttering or getting flush. For me this drug is a godsend. Thank you. Its been 2 weeks now and I'm still doing fine. I really feel for people that can't get their anxiety under control. I lived with anxiety way too long. Now hopefully its over.
I could go on and on about how bad anxiety controlled me. I could write a million words of the situations that would trigger it. What I have written above is just a scratch compared to all the things that would trigger it. There is just not enough room. Its good to know that I'm not the only one fighting this stuff.
I have always been told that I was hyper or fast paced. I think I was just letting my anxiety control me. Whatever was different about me, I accepted it as who I was. I have always been clumsy around the opposite sex or people of authority. When asking a woman out for a date, I would always trip and fall or stutter to the point that I gave up on asking girls out completely. I would resort to chatting online and meeting new people there, as my anxiety was always dormant when I was alone. I had some legal trouble quite a few years ago that required me to attend court once a month and this lasted for 2 years before it was all over. The thought of not knowing what was going to happen each time I went, for those two years really put my anxiety in overdrive. I gave up emotionally as anxiety continued to grow and grow inside me. Anxiety took a firm grip on my body and It was taking over.
I finally learned what triggered my anxiety. I tried my best to avoid certain situations. I was sure I was going to have a heart attack or stroke. Going out in public to the store or gas station was horrible. A stranger walking up to me to ask for directions would make my heart race. Getting a phone call would cause me to shake uncontrollably as I didn't know who or why someone would be calling me. I always thought the worst. I would tell myself that this was a phone call telling me something bad was going to happen or is going to happen. When I would go for job interviews I would freeze when asked questions. My anxiety was debilitating and severe. I used illegal drugs for a while, (marijuana). I'm not going to lie. It helped me. I was always zoned out and stoned. My anxiety was still there but just toned down a notch. I used pot to escape everything all together. I was alone in my own little world even if I was out in public. ANXIETY IS HORRIBLE.
I found out about my anxiety by accident. Searching my symptoms and talking to people with anxiety led me to conclude that I did in fact have it. A few weeks ago I went to my wife's general doctor and noticed a sign on the door. : We are not a pain clinic, we don't give out opoids. We give antibiotics, stitch up cuts, take blood pressure and treat anxiety, blood pressure, high cholesterol. If your looking for pain pills your at the wrong place. One word stood out for me. ... .
I went in and seen a doctor and told him of my story and he told me he would help me. He gave me a prescription of buspirone. The first time I took a dose it was instant relief. I could not believe how calm I was. How all my nervousness was gone. How now I actually wanted to go out in public because for the first time I could talk to someone without stuttering or getting flush. For me this drug is a godsend. Thank you. Its been 2 weeks now and I'm still doing fine. I really feel for people that can't get their anxiety under control. I lived with anxiety way too long. Now hopefully its over.
I could go on and on about how bad anxiety controlled me. I could write a million words of the situations that would trigger it. What I have written above is just a scratch compared to all the things that would trigger it. There is just not enough room. Its good to know that I'm not the only one fighting this stuff.
