My personal experience regarding "unofficial" depression

[THORsday]

I was a normal student during my elementary and High school days. A consistent honor student. Suddenly, I started to get low grades during my 2nd year in college. The reason? Lack of focus. Those who I care left me. My family isn't supportive regarding my extra activities. I became distant with my family. I engaged in dangerous activities without the knowledge of my family. I even tried thinking of what they should do if I died. I also started to eat less. I can't eat a lot. My body won't let me. From 90 lbs., my weight is now 80-84 pounds. Not normal for my height. One moment I'm jolly, the next, I think I might kill someone. Or tears would fall down.


I know that some of these are signs of depression. But my problem is I couldn't afford to take an exam. A diagnostic test. My studies is at the edge of falling.


I told my friends regarding my situation. But they always tell me that there's nothing wrong with me. I doubt them. I know my body. My actions are not normal anymore. I don't know what to do. I know that some of you have experienced what I've experienced.


Let me know what you think.

 

[redpanda]

Your university will have a psychiatrist, go to the counseling center (or equivalent) and ask. Generally, it's included in tuition so you shouldn't have to pay anything. Even if you do, they're usually able to work with students. You can also google free or low cost clinics in your area. There's a mental health center where I live that offers income-based payment plans. If you can't afford it at all, they'll still see you and let you pay later. Either way, know that depression is treatable and get help asap.

 

[THORsday]

Your university will have a psychiatrist, go to the counseling center (or equivalent) and ask. Generally, it's included in tuition so you shouldn't have to pay anything. Even if you do, they're usually able to work with students. You can also google free or low cost clinics in your area. There's a mental health center where I live that offers income-based payment plans. If you can't afford it at all, they'll still see you and let you pay later. Either way, know that depression is treatable and get help asap.

I'm still finding time though. I can't afford any absences now. I've had too many absences for this sem. And it scares me a lot. I'm too shy to ask my professors if I can see a guidance counselor. Because their aura is not approachable.

 

[pwarbi]

Personally I don't think it matters what others say or think about the way you're acting and if you yourself don't think you are right, then it would be wise to at least see your doctor or get some sort of one off counseling session. I know you say you can't afford anymore time off, but wouldn't it b better to just take one day or at least a couple of hours off to get a professional opinion? If you don't and things get worse then it could lead to you having to have a lot more time off so it's best to get things sorted as soon as you can.


Another reason to see somebody and get an expert opinion, is that if you don't then your clearly worried about it and so worry can make you even worse. Worry and stress can lead to anxiety and in turn, even though you may not be clinically depressed now, the longer it goes on then the more chance that it could lead to depression in the future.

 

[Robilas]

I know that some of these are signs of depression. But my problem is I couldn't afford to take an exam. A diagnostic test. My studies is at the edge of falling.

I think that you should hear a professional opinion. Don't listen to your friends, even if they know you sometimes they simply don't want to face the truth or they don't want to tell you something bad. However nobody knows you like yourself. If you think that you are depressed, well, go and check it.


Even if think to don't have time for a diagnostic test or a visit, find it somehow. In the long run it will pay off since you will be able to improve your focus and your grades will raise. You can still improve and recover from your situation, as long as you recognize that you have a problem.

 

[cecejailer]

Your friends say there's nothing wrong with you because they're not in your head and don't know how bad you feel. Believe me, I know that. If you feel like there's something happening to you, it most likely is, otherwise you wouldn't even need to ask yourself that question. I think the best thing for you to do is save some money to get an official diagnosis. It's best to simply spend some money you don't want to spend right now than to regret years from now when you can't even leave your dorm without panicking. If you can, ask for money from your parents or even friends, promise you will pay them back as soon as you can. (Don't do this if you're not sure you might be able to pay them later.)

 

[kgord]

Most colleges and universities have mehtal health staff that can help you with your depression. They are free to see and might be able to give you the assistance you seek. I think that it is highly probable you can get free diagnosis and treatment. Why not get the assistance you seek? You are the best judge of how you feel and what is in character for you and what is not. I think it is important you seek treatment.

 

[nytegeek]

I was a normal student during my elementary and High school days. A consistent honor student. Suddenly, I started to get low grades during my 2nd year in college. The reason? Lack of focus. Those who I care left me. My family isn't supportive regarding my extra activities. I became distant with my family. I engaged in dangerous activities without the knowledge of my family. I even tried thinking of what they should do if I died. I also started to eat less. I can't eat a lot. My body won't let me. From 90 lbs., my weight is now 80-84 pounds. Not normal for my height. One moment I'm jolly, the next, I think I might kill someone. Or tears would fall down.
I know that some of these are signs of depression. But my problem is I couldn't afford to take an exam. A diagnostic test. My studies is at the edge of falling.


I told my friends regarding my situation. But they always tell me that there's nothing wrong with me. I doubt them. I know my body. My actions are not normal anymore. I don't know what to do. I know that some of you have experienced what I've experienced.


Let me know what you think.

Where are you attending school? I can't imagine that they wouldn't have the staff and resources to help with this type of situation. Any major college or University in the USA, Canada, or the UK would, but I don't know beyond that.

 

[tiffanylynette]

Talk to your adviser, see if the services offered through your school are offered during periods that you have a break in your schedule or if they have an offsite place that may be covered under your school. I received my first sessions through my school and me of my teachers who was worried about me allowed me to go during his class period and I still received my attendance for class. Please seek help sooner rather than later as your expressing thoughts of harming yourself and others. That is a dangerous thought cycle especially when you are depressed.

 

[nytegeek]

I already responded earlier but this thought has been nagging me, though not entirely important to the discussion. I think the word you are looking for is undiagnosed, not unofficial, as there is no such thing as official or unofficial depression. Your spell checker may not care for undiagnosed, but it is a real word and a better one for this situation.

 

[THORsday]

I was a normal student during my elementary and High school days. A consistent honor student. Suddenly, I started to get low grades during my 2nd year in college. The reason? Lack of focus. Those who I care left me. My family isn't supportive regarding my extra activities. I became distant with my family. I engaged in dangerous activities without the knowledge of my family. I even tried thinking of what they should do if I died. I also started to eat less. I can't eat a lot. My body won't let me. From 90 lbs., my weight is now 80-84 pounds. Not normal for my height. One moment I'm jolly, the next, I think I might kill someone. Or tears would fall down.
I know that some of these are signs of depression. But my problem is I couldn't afford to take an exam. A diagnostic test. My studies is at the edge of falling.


I told my friends regarding my situation. But they always tell me that there's nothing wrong with me. I doubt them. I know my body. My actions are not normal anymore. I don't know what to do. I know that some of you have experienced what I've experienced.


Let me know what you think.

Where are you attending school? I can't imagine that they wouldn't have the staff and resources to help with this type of situation. Any major college or University in the USA, Canada, or the UK would, but I don't know beyond that.

Actually, I'm from the Philippines. And for somebody to be able to access diagnostic tests, a recommendation from a guidance counselor is a requirement

 

[Pandora]

Can your family help you out in some form? Do you have a family doctor that will allow you to do payments and see you after your schooling day? As others have mentioned, can you see the college/university's mental health provider to get things going for you? Maybe by talking to a counselor he/she may be able to have some pointers on what is going on mentally. I know in the USA we have clinics that provide aid to those of us that are low-income. I don't know if you have low-income services but, it would be worth looking in to before things get worse for you. Plus, you always have this forum that others are going through similar issues, you can use this forum to talk to others, and gather information from. I hope you can find a counselor to talk to real soon.

 

[Alex]

There are many people who are 'unofficially' depressed because they don't wish to admit it, and they cope until they either find a way to deal with it or they get worse and are forced to seek help. There is a stigma still and friends can only tell you so much, and I am guessing if they are your peers they won't have had much experience of what depression actually is.


I think you should find a counselor first to talk things through and then they can refer you, or suggest a course of action. In many cases depression can hit people and if they get support and counseling they don't need any medication. As a student the pressure of studies and anxiety maybe the cause and when it is over the feelings maybe less intense. Maybe you can find a teacher that can help you?

 

[Houille]

Hello there,


you should most definitely go to your guidance counselor. I know it's scary, and I know that mental health is a big taboo topic in the Philippines (although luckily, lately, there has been more support regarding this), but what you are describing are classic symptoms of a depression. There is no such thing as "unofficial" depression, the term you're looking for is "undiagnosed" - but really, getting a diagnosis will only confirm your suspicions at this point, I believe.


Still, talk to your guidance counselor, it's good to have someone to listen to you. You don't need your professor's permission for that, just do it during your break - go to your guidance counselor's office and tell them about how you feel and ask them if you could maybe schedule a weekly meeting or something. And unless things have changed, I know that it's free to talk to your guidance counselor.


Anyway, I hope you find the courage to reach out, and wag ka mawalan ng pagasa.

 

[bangtanboys]

If you feel sad for a long period of time, then that's depression, diagnosis or not. You know yourself better than anybody. At my worst stages of my "unofficial" depression, I too was afraid of calling it that because it felt unfair for those who really did have it. I was afraid to seek help as well because of the taboo behind mental health, even though I was taking loads of mental health classes at the time that preached acceptance. If you don't feel comfortable speaking to counselors or professionals that should be provided by your school, I totally get it. Support systems exist outside of just the medical field, and I would urge you to speak to the ones you feel most close to like I did. You'd be surprised at just how many people have gone through the same thing you are struggling with. Alternatively, you can also find them online at communities such as forums or social medias.


I hope everything works out for you. College is a tough time, believe me. I hit my lowest point when I first entered university, when everything in my life was starting to change. I couldn't adapt to these changes as readily as my peers, so I shut everyone and everything I loved out. But just remember that it's the ones who have been and will always be there for you that makes life worth living.