Learning how to drive.

[Rinka]

Hi guys,
I know I have not been very active for a while. Seems to depend on my anxiety levels. The higher the more I write.
Which kind of brings me to my topic, high anxiety levels.
I am learning how to drive at the moment. I have been to arrogant and booked at 30 hour intensive cours. Never have driven in my life and thought that this would bring me to a licence.
But oh I have not calculated with my anxiety and my resulting brain fog and brain dead.
I know what I have to do, but I just can't bring myself to properly apply what I have learned. I get panicky with other road users and concentrate on what they are doing, rather the what I am doing with the car.
I have now cancelled my test and continue the 30 hours but without being test ready as a goal.
I really hope it will work that removing the pressure of an imminent test, will help me relax.

Have you ever handled such a situation? And if yes what strategies did you use? My partner gave me L-Theanine, a supplement that relaxes, relieves anxiety and clears the brain.
I hope it will help me. I really want to drive. I have the feeling that my whole future is reliant on it. That might be were the pressure is coming from.

 

[Concernedgal]

Putting pressure on yourself is a definite trigger for anxiety. I'm afraid I can't be of much help because I am 32 and still haven't obtained a driver license myself. So , I know what your going through though and it's a bitch. I'm sorry. I've driven and I can t"technically " drive but, I just don't. Will you let me know how that L- Theanine works? I'm sorry I couldn't be more help to you. But, you are definitely not alone.

 

[Rinka]

@Concernedgal don't worry
I will take the L-Theanine this evening and will report back to you

 

[Concernedgal]

You do that.

 

[janemariesayed]

Hi guys,
I know I have not been very active for a while. Seems to depend on my anxiety levels. The higher the more I write.
Which kind of brings me to my topic, high anxiety levels.
I am learning how to drive at the moment. I have been to arrogant and booked at 30 hour intensive cours. Never have driven in my life and thought that this would bring me to a licence.
But oh I have not calculated with my anxiety and my resulting brain fog and brain dead.
I know what I have to do, but I just can't bring myself to properly apply what I have learned. I get panicky with other road users and concentrate on what they are doing, rather the what I am doing with the car.
I have now cancelled my test and continue the 30 hours but without being test ready as a goal.
I really hope it will work that removing the pressure of an imminent test, will help me relax.

Have you ever handled such a situation? And if yes what strategies did you use? My partner gave me L-Theanine, a supplement that relaxes, relieves anxiety and clears the brain.
I hope it will help me. I really want to drive. I have the feeling that my whole future is reliant on it. That might be were the pressure is coming from.

Considering your level of anxieties, maybe it would be better to change your lessons to once per week. Trying to cram it all in is not going to help you learn. Not if you suffer from brain fog anyway. I get brain fog and have had it all my life. I find it easier to learn at a slower pace. I can learn, but it has to be at my speed. The speed that my brain takes to comprehend it all. My mind gets blank and I can't remember. once I have learned though, I am a fast and steady worker and learn my trade well, what ever it is.

So I suggest that you stop trying to learn to drive quicker than your brain wants to and relax with it. If you had one lesson per week, you would find it less stressful and more enjoyable. There is no rush, relax and enjoy your lessons once a week and you will find it is enough. You will still get through your test but without all the amount of stress and anxieties.

 

[misszerable]

I think you're putting too much pressure on yourself by trying to learn to drive in 30 hours to pass the test and get your license. It took me a year to get the courage to apply for a license. I am usually a fast learner but driving is just too much for me. It was easy to drive when I have the road all to myself, but not in normal traffic. It took awhile for me to gain the confidence to drive during daytime and till now, I would still prefer to drive at dawn or during late nights when there are fewer cars to contend with. I would suggest you take it easy and pick the best time to take your lessons. I am a night person and my brain is usually at its best during nighttime. I find it easier to absorb lessons at night. My brother was my driving instructor and he used to pick me up very early in the morning to give me driving lessons. I was like a zombie then and didn't learn much from those sessions. I only started to pick up my pace when he agreed to teach me between 10 pm to midnight.

 

[Rinka]

Thank you so much for your reply @janemariesayed, @Concernedgal and @misszerable. I have taken L-Theanine for the lessons it did not hep me. But it helped me to sleep. Quite quickly after 30 minutes of taking it.
I have now cancelled my intensive lessons and will get new lessons, about 2 to 3 times a week. The instructor I had was really stressing. I felt very uncomfortable with her and she build too much pressure for me. I don't want to give up. I want to learn how to drive. I will just take more time with it and maybe with a male driver.
Female on female seems not to be my thing.

 

[janemariesayed]

A male driver may be better for you. It certainly would be if you think it so anyway. I am wondering if 2 to 3 times a week may still be a little too much for you. At least, it isn't every single day. Yes, it will take longer to learn, but you will be less stressed for it. If you find that it is still too stressful, then you can bring it down to maybe once or twice per week depending on how you feel.

Remember that you are the best driver in the world. It's all the other crazy people out there that aren't driving properly. So keep your look out, listen to your instructor and stay safe. I'm sure you are going to do fine!

 

[Rinka]

Yea I'm playing with the thought of having lessons once or twic a week.
On Monday I will start again for two hours after work, but with another driving school.
I just wish I had someone how could practice with my privately, to the a feeling for the road.

 

[janemariesayed]

Yea I'm playing with the thought of having lessons once or twic a week.
On Monday I will start again for two hours after work, but with another driving school.
I just wish I had someone how could practice with my privately, to the a feeling for the road.

I taught my husband to drive in a car park. Then when he was used to the car a bit, I would take him up on a very quiet road. It was a hill as well so he could practice his hill starts.

I just think that if you are anxious anyway, that doing too much will be too much! Taking it at a slower pace will be less stressful. I know what you mean about practice though. You do need to practice throughout the week. Does your hubby have a car? Or maybe a good friend who has passed their test?

I am not sure what country you are in, but here in the UK, we have some rules for learners. Anyone who has passed their test for longer than 6 months can teach another driver. So if you have any friends or family who doesn't mind taking you out every so often that would be good for you. If you can find anyone to help you with practice, then I would suggest having a lesson twice a week. Driving twice a week won't stress you out and it will also be close enough together to not forget what you learn as well.

 

[Rinka]

I live in the uk too, near London.
But unfortunately my partner, our house mate and his girlfriend all do not have a driving licence. I would be the first to do it and then it would be me teaching them.
Might be that this is part of my stress as well. I pressure myself into this, with life goals I want to reach and get myself frustrated if I need more time, then I wanted to give me.

 

[janemariesayed]

Oh no, none of them has a license at all! Of course, that would put you under pressure to pass and quickly too. No, don't allow that to happen. You take control of your own life and learn to drive in your own time, as you feel you want to. Some people can take years to get through their test so you can relax as it doesn't sound like it will take you years.

What about family and other friends? Or maybe someone at work? Failing finding a host, then it may be best to have two lessons a week. Spread apart by 3 or 4 days in between them.

You may find these links interesting. On the first link look under the 'Quick Tips' tab.

http://driveractive.com/

This link seemed to have videos on learning to drive.
http://www.drivinghelp.com/Pages/Lessons_Online-Lesson-Links

You will find it useful if you read the highway code book for 10 minutes every day. It will sink in slowly and by the time you have your test it will all be known to you. You could also play a game with yourself. Whenever you are in a car or a bus, and you see a road sign, try to guess what it is and then check it in your book to see if you were right. In your mind too, pretend it is you who is driving, not the driver. Watch the road ahead and imagine yourself changing gear etc. All these things you can do that will help you with your practice. Not all practice has to be practical. If you read about driving techniques you will be surprised how well they do actually sink in and you realise that when you are behind the wheel.

Relax with it and enjoy it. Go at your own pace and don't worry about making mistakes. Just relax and have fun doing it. Maybe your household will see you enjoying it so much that they will start to want to learn to drive too!

 

[Rinka]

Thank you so much for you help.
It means a lot to me.

 

[Emma_s]

Hello! I was anxious when learning to drive too. But I managed to get through it and got my licence. You just have to take your time. I agree with everyone, you were putting too much pressure on yourself. I want to add don't be pressured by others, I know people can make you feel like you're making a big deal out of what they consider an easy task. You'll learn at your own pace and move on when you're ready. You can also play some of your favorite music on a low volume to help you relax, it helped me. Best of luck and keep us updated!

 

[janemariesayed]

That is a really good idea! To play some music while you are learning. Just softly in the background will certainly help you to relax.

I am sure you will do really well and pass your test without any problems. Good luck with it and enjoy! It will give you so much liberty once you have passed. So take your time learning and you will pass the first time.

And do this for yourself, not for others. Don't learn to drive and get through your test so you can be other people's taxi service. Once you have passed embrace your liberty, you will have a lot of fun times out.