I'm Afraid of Inadvertently Offending my Friends via Texts

[Camden]

Whenever I text my two best buddies, I always choose my words carefully and use smiley emojis to prevent my messages from having a rude or angry tone. When I don't hear back quickly, I'll think I did or said something insulting and they don't want to talk to me anymore. Yes, I know this is irrational, but it bothers me so much because my friendships are extremely valuable to me.

I'm afraid of having hidden offensive undertones in my texts and I sometimes have unwanted thoughts of sending texts with foul language and obscene pictures. That's totally out of character for me, but it's how my OCD and social anxiety affect my thoughts. I'll go back and proofread my texts and even take screenshots to reassure myself later in the day that I didn't do or say anything inappropriate to my friends.

I even go through our previous in-person interactions with a fine toothed comb and think about anything I did or said that came across as offensive or annoying. My first thought when my friend(s) don't text me back quickly is that they're mad at me or repulsed by me for some reason. I wish I could be more comfortable about this and send imperfect, sloppy texts without a second thought. I know it doesn't bother me when I get texts with mistakes from my friends.

 

[Cuchculan]

I am sure you will never really offend them. This is the exact same as the person who playsback the events of their whole day wondering they said and done everything the right way. Your worry is about text messages and what you put in them. Others worry about what they said to people. How they acted around people. Is all how the OCD mind plays things out. I would say, by way of trying to help yourself, just try text in a normal way. Without thinking what you are writing. Might be hard to do for the first while. Is this whole thing of thinking too much that is making things as bad as they are for you. What would happen if you didn't stop to think? Just done random things. Fact that you are still friends with these people shows you never done anything to offend them. I know it is not easy. But the trick here is stop yourself when you find yourself thinking too much. Right at that moment have something else to do. By way of distracting the mind. Will take time to be able to do this. Because you are used to doing things the OCD way. But with a small bit of training it can be done.