I need help...

[Greyblue24]

I am not sure where to begin, but seeing as how this is the introduction forum, I will keep it light.

I have been battling with anxiety, depression, and PTSD for a little over five years now. I went through several extreme traumas in a short amount of time, one being a near death experience, another the loss of all family and friends.

I was abandoned during one of the worst times of my life, stranded to brave this monstrous storm alone. I was taken in by a friend, but at the time he was no more than a stranger, to this day he is all I have for support in this world. I exhaust him, and even though he’s given me no reason to distrust him, I fear him abandoning me as well.

Everyday is a struggle, every damn day. I have plowed my way through many jobs, sticking it out as long as I could, and eventually having to quit due to becoming overwhelmed. I guess that is why I’m here, I’m facing the same crossroads, I am contemplating quitting my job today. This would be the fourth one just this year. I work a few months, become overwhelmed with anxiety, stress, and depression.

it’s been the same story for every job, I start a new job, everything is fine, then I crash, rinse and repeat. I can’t live a normal life, I feel totally alone and defeated. All I want to do is to hide deep with the confounds of my bed, never leaving the safety and comfort of my home.

I’m at the end of my frayed rope, clinging on to the transparent fibers that keep me from falling back into rock bottom. I keep going back and forth about quitting today, I know the relief that comes from quitting, but I’m also vigilantly aware of the loss of security.

I need help, guidance, and most of all, peace of mind. I don’t want to live like this anymore, I need to reach out, go back on my medicine, whatever it takes to finally heal. I’m not sure if I will ever get better, I feel like I’m doomed to feel tormented by this grief and anxiety for the rest of my life.

Thanks for the vent...

 

[URfine]

I am not sure where to begin, but seeing as how this is the introduction forum, I will keep it light.

I have been battling with anxiety, depression, and PTSD for a little over five years now. I went through several extreme traumas in a short amount of time, one being a near death experience, another the loss of all family and friends.

I was abandoned during one of the worst times of my life, stranded to brave this monstrous storm alone. I was taken in by a friend, but at the time he was no more than a stranger, to this day he is all I have for support in this world. I exhaust him, and even though he’s given me no reason to distrust him, I fear him abandoning me as well.

Everyday is a struggle, every damn day. I have plowed my way through many jobs, sticking it out as long as I could, and eventually having to quit due to becoming overwhelmed. I guess that is why I’m here, I’m facing the same crossroads, I am contemplating quitting my job today. This would be the fourth one just this year. I work a few months, become overwhelmed with anxiety, stress, and depression.

it’s been the same story for every job, I start a new job, everything is fine, then I crash, rinse and repeat. I can’t live a normal life, I feel totally alone and defeated. All I want to do is to hide deep with the confounds of my bed, never leaving the safety and comfort of my home.

I’m at the end of my frayed rope, clinging on to the transparent fibers that keep me from falling back into rock bottom. I keep going back and forth about quitting today, I know the relief that comes from quitting, but I’m also vigilantly aware of the loss of security.

I need help, guidance, and most of all, peace of mind. I don’t want to live like this anymore, I need to reach out, go back on my medicine, whatever it takes to finally heal. I’m not sure if I will ever get better, I feel like I’m doomed to feel tormented by this grief and anxiety for the rest of my life.

Thanks for the vent...

There is hope . Please reach out to a professional. Meds work for many people. Many of us on this forum have been battling mental illness for years . No one will do it for you though . My wife is awesome , but I wear her out. You need to take responsibility for your own health and start doing things to get better . For me exercising is a big positive influence. Read what works for others . Hang in there. A better life can start today.

 

[Adirv14]

Things will get better. Depending on your profession having stress regarding work is pretty common for most. I go through many ups and downs over the course of the year with my job. I assume you do aswell since you have been able to obtain employment 4 different times. I would bet you felt pretty decent when you applied and interviewed but when you quit you were in a low spot.

It may help to figure out a healthy schedule. Do you take any personal days, vacations or do things for yourself outside of work? If not, you definitely need to make that a priority regardless of how tired you feel when you get home from the office or shift. I know being at home sounds safe and comforting but for me I had to push myself to get out and about. It gets easier each time you do it.

If your profession has a good HR resource they may be able to help you with the rougher times you have. If in the united states there are things such as fmla/short term dissability leave. I would save that for the most extreme cases. Some professions have local groups and organizations targeted to helps those in your field with mental illness.

Find a good doctor and therapist to be on your team. They will be able to help guide you aswell.

I have felt doomed or like I would never be normal again. I have been battling anxiety for 7 years. You can still live your life and do everything you want to do with mental illness but it starts with you being dedicated to yourself that you will live your life. I work the same job although it is stressful it is manageable. If you find a better job definitely take it but dont quit because you feel your anxiety is controlling you.

I also agree that a good diet and excercise will help tremendously.

 

[Hurt&Hopeful]

Hey there, and welcome. I'm also an anxiety/PTSD sufferer, and my heart hurts for you reading your post. PTSD is so strange - it just stops you from functioning in the weirdest ways. But I promise that it can get better! Right now, you need to focus on getting yourself some help. Nothing else matters. You need a doctor, and you need a therapist, preferably someone who specializes in trauma recovery. I don't know where you live or what your options are, but there are lots of options out there. If you DON'T have access to therapy, then there are online resources that can help as well. But you need to get some help dealing with this so you can start healing. There Is hope, and there is healing - you can't undo what's happened, but it doesn't have to determine how the rest of your life goes. Hang in there - I'm glad you found this forum, and I hope you make some friends here!