I got abused by support workers!

[Peter A]

Hello, people.

I live in Scotland, and I used to get support because of having autism. These care providers I had abused me badly, and it has really lowered my confidence, and made me an angry and depressed person.

This story may come across as an obscure tangent to some people, so I will try to keep it kind of short, as my brain tends to go a hundred miles an hour, and it would be hard to follow as an outsider reading all of this.

Anyway, I started getting support years ago after receiving my diagnosis of PDD-NOS in my early 20's, and I went into supported housing back in 2011. I had issues a long time ago when some older guy who supported me, sent me tons of emails with a fake name, talking about various things and insulting me for reasons that were never revealed, but I think other staff members had been filling in the gaps about issues I kept bringing up about an ex-girlfriend I missed, and whatnot. He admitted to doing that, however, and he either left the company or got sacked in 2010.

At different points, I had these women removed amid concerns I was getting infatuated with them, but I never harmed them at all. Before they were removed, I noticed that after they knew I liked them, they were not treating me that nice during my support hours, but I did not want to tell anybody. One of them was actually assigned as my "key worker" and she is Hispanic. She used to be in a relationship with a guy that has a fitness business, and I met him once at a club. It was just that one time though, and he has used that against me in police reports ever since, even though I never said anything out of line to the guy back then. He just asked me what happened between Sara and I, when we were all at some charity gig, and that was it. We spoke briefly outside while she was still inside, and I went home. However, after that, he joined in with his former partner in screwing up my life, repeatedly.

Anyway, the people in charge of my rota had removed these two ladies at separate times, and rather than telling me the truth, they removed them and constantly said they were still my workers, sometimes with a stupid look on their faces. When I eventually snapped because I knew I was getting messed around, they tried to say that's why they were removed, but that's all hogwash. Eventually, it got to the point where they were calling the police to have me arrested, and then they lied and made out they did not know about this happening to me, but once, the police got the spare keys from 'the staff flat' next door to where I resided, to stop me going to a coffee shop. The women also stopped doing sleepovers at the accommodation, and I seldom seen them around after that. But their betrayal made me more and more agitated.

In the summer of 2014, I was remanded in jail after getting arrested for different reasons. After I was released, I tried to offer an apology to the women for whatever it was I supposedly did, which was not really anything. But I was not meant to contact them, so I was arrested a few times again and placed back into jail for a few more weeks, and some guy assaulted me in the cell I was in. Many months later, I had to give up my tenancy too as the court decided I could not live there, although the manager for this company had me signing a blank piece of paper in her office. She asked me to write my name on it. That should not have counted. There was nothing on it at all.

Then in 2015, I sent these people messages again, and I ended up in another prison many miles from home, after being 'fully committed' to jail, and I was even accused of something serious that was untrue. Later that year, I was in jail again, but only for several days, due to another breach of bail. This guy attacked me in a holding cell, just for me saying I was put on protection. The other men in the cell witnessed it, but did not care.

Over the years, I have gotten arrested even more times, all over these women or one of their ex-boyfriends constantly calling the police, when I only wanted to make amends with this Spanish lady. In the summer of last year, I had to go to court in another town following a breach of a non harassment order, as she apparently resides there now. Last year, I was in jail (this time, sentenced to 70 days in custody) and I didn't get out until December, as I got a similar concurrent sentence for not doing community service for an unrelated conviction to do with me pestering a singer from a band in the eighties who acted nasty towards me, when they were told I couldn't do this work due to having anxiety problems. Not only that, they extended the no contact orders for this woman and her ex to 10 years, and it affects me for getting jobs now. I'm interested in being in films, but I have only been an extra in some movies that nobody really cares about. Apart from that, social services have been giving me the cold shoulder for years now, and I'm still paying rent arrears from a year ago, due to my time in jail exceeding 13 weeks.

I've also contacted other people that know my former key worker from Spain, through Facebook, and they just get passive-aggressive each time when all I've done is explain what occurred. The other day, some knob threatened to report me to the police. Unfortunately, when I go to advice shops and call legal aid lawyers to discuss the pursuit of legal action, I just get a dizzy spell. So, what else can I do here? Life feels pointless now.

 

[Cuchculan]

What exactly where you charged with? I am trying to figure out the crime here. I know under Scottish law, even if a person refuses to press charges, if the police think a crime has been committed they can still prosecute a person. From your words I can only assume it is like some kind of stalking charge or something similar. These don't normally carry any sort of prison time to begin with. You might get a warning. The main warning will be to stay away from the person / people they are saying you stalked. Or harassed. It is only if you make contact with them you can be arrested again. Even on the second arrest you would most probably be released with stricter conditions about your release. Contact them again and this time a short prison term would be handed down. But if there is something wrong with you. This PDD-NOS. A judge should have had you evaulated. Based around this condition. To see where you in a stable frame of mind to know what you were doing or not doing. At times cases are their word against yours. You should have broken all contact with anybody involved in the angency that handles these care workers. I have no idea why they would want to keep you on as a patient. If you had been charged with doing anything against one of their workers. That is another mystery. But you made even more contact on FB with people who know this care worker. That again was a wrong move. From the off you should have just let it be. Had a look around and see where there any more care groups out there. Is a no win situation. I know you want to take civil action against them. Clear your name. But by now you have been in prison a few times for breaking the terms of your bail. This and a lot of other things will be used against you. Can you find a solid way to prove you done nothing wrong? They will just say the exact same things they have been saying all along. Is one to think about before you actually do it. As in will it lead to even more trouble? Or do you have something new, that you didn't have before, that you can use to clear your name?

 

[Peter A]

Basically, I obsessed over a girl that I never saw for years. She contacted me on Facebook and I asked her to meet me. We then met up, and she used me for my money. At one point, I bought her an iPod (on credit) and she damaged it, and it's a long story, but she had been seeing this other guy and pulling the "I just want to be friends" card. About a year later, I got us a games console when I thought she was acting better. She did not pay her share. You can imagine that she was just out to scam me.

I've used escorts, but they are nasty people. I'm sure somebody stole money out of my pocket the other week when I was in a sauna, too.

Getting back to the main topic now: I then asked a support worker on a date, which is not allowed. The woman did not have shifts with me for months. They gave me one shift with her, just because it was at a place for service users, and when I wanted to go out to get juice, she acted weird. After that, she must have said she did not want to work with me any longer for whatever reason, and the people in charge at my supported accommodation then lied, and said she was busy, and they essentially kept on lying for months, by saying she was still my support worker. When I eventually got angry, they used that against me to say that was why she got removed. It is a lie.

The same thing happened with my key worker as well, just several months later. I had this pretty looking Spanish lady as a key worker. She was told by somebody who worked with me, that I fancied her. Plus, a service user on Facebook argued with me and also deliberately said something to her to try to pass me off as being a weirdo, and I also kept telling Sara things about my sex life, and she went with me once to a sexual health clinic. Well, Sara changed one day. My sister also told me this guy messaged her on Facebook, and admitted he said something to Sara.

One day, we were on a bus, and she blew up at me because I called her "petal" in a text message. She upset me. I put my arm around her, but that was it. She washed my dishes. I lay on my bed feeling sad. She found me, and stood at the door, then left when the shift was over. When we had shifts after that day, she started bullying me. After a while, I thought things were getting a bit better. She seemed a bit nicer than she had been before. After that day though, I don't know what happened. They removed her too, and she and her bosses collaborated on lying to me. They never even sat me down to talk about the boundaries, so I could relay that in court.

Months later, I got arrested for throwing temper tantrums when they would not reinstate these women, and I sent emails saying I was going to hire a model and do porn with her. I was also found near one of their flats, but I was sitting on a bench in a park, and they probably traced my mobile number using their technology. But how was I to know that was going to happen? Plus, as I said, they called the cops and then lied about that as well.

When I went to jail on remand, my mother was furious, and the staff tried to cover it up, and they said they did not handle things right. The following year, they had me signing away my tenancy, allegedly due to rent arrears, but it's really because the court would not allow me to live there. I'm convinced that story about the rent issues was a lie too, because I called the council. Something smelled funny. And not only that, my rent was supposed to be paid for me anyway.

Now I don't have any support at all. This social worker found me a few helpers before, but I got the impression they were just being used like stool pigeons, to monitor me. They also did not offer flexible support and it was a waste of time to keep them around. I kept calling this social worker, and he did not return any of my calls. I also had to see a supervisor because of the court orders, and he was obnoxious. He thought I had a crush on my dentist too, because I said to him that I told her about the workers stabbing me in the back, when she asked where my support workers were, since she knew I usually went to the dentist with one of these people at check-ups. My mother thought it was ridiculous too. So, to put it like this: I got made out to be some sort of sex pest.

Plus, trolls online have abused me for years, and I have no partner, nor a job, or social life, which is why I have posted on forums for this long in the first place. It all got worse a year ago, when I defended this Nemesis guy that these trolls on YouTube are now friendly towards, despite their initial feud. But it's like I've been saying for long enough: People online are toxic, and I cannot be bothered with the hassle now. This is all over Resident Evil related opinions. In this live stream we did on Discord, they were talking about my personal life, and calling me a woman beater, among other things. Nemesis also tried to make out that when the other guys did response videos, it was all for "fun" and all.

They mocked me for nearly 2 hours, on Discord. Nemesis constantly blocks me on his live streams. He also gets his users to act as moderators.

 

[Cuchculan]

Can you not see that you crossed a line you were not meant to cross with a care worker? You might see all this one way. But it can all be viewed another way too.

Asking a care worker on a date

Texting a care worker. Calling her petal. Which over this side of the world is more a romantic word at times.

Putting your arm around a care worker on a bus

Sitting outside the home of a care worker

Send sexually suggestive emails

Trying to contact somebody on FB about the care worker

This just all adds up in their eyes. I am really surprised they continued to send their staff to your house. Ties should have been broken both ways. It was me I would leave it be. You go to a civil court I can't see them taking your side on this one. As well as the things mentioned above, you also broke the conditions of your bail a number of times. They will simply claim they did not feel safe letting their workers visit you. They will say other things too. It might only get worse for you. Not better. So really think it through before you make your mind up.

 

[Peter A]

Yeah. I know that, but what they should have done was caution me first about the code of ethics that are expected between the care personnel and their clients, per the agency's policy on boundaries, and this would have been the fairer thing to do. Had another breach of ethics occurred again, this would have been grounds for their dismissal. Besides, asking someone out, while not appropriate from their point of view, is not overly immoral in my opinion. They did not have to make a mountain out of a molehill over something I perceived as being so minor. I'd just been feeling lonely and depressed because of not being able to acquire much of a social life. They later worsened my anxiety.

After the first incident with the other woman, I was not planning on casting it up again. She just felt jumpy over the matter, requested her removal, and then proceeded to get the higher-ups to tell me lies. Even after they called the police to have me lifted at my home, they lied about that too. And like I said, being asked to end my tenancy by signing my name on a blank piece of paper should not have been legal either, but I cannot prove that this ever happened. There's no witnesses, because I went to see the boss by myself in her office.

Essentially, what they did was take them off my rota and act dishonest about it, then stitch me up. Can you see why that's not appropriate either? I've also stated that a male support worker sent me abusive emails. What if he had been caught out? Do you know he could have gotten banned from finding employment as a support worker?

I posted a thread about him on Wrong Planet, over 6 years. Although I don't think the people who responded had a clue what I was talking about.

I have PDD-NOS and this support worker harassed me. | Asperger's & Autism Community - Wrong Planet

wrongplanet.net

 

[Cuchculan]

Did you keep these emails that were sent to you? That might be one thing that helps you out. Some form of proof that they done something wrong. That is what you need if you are going to try and take civil action against them. I assume you want your name cleared and your record wiped clean. I am not sure if that can happen in a smaller court. Not if there was a conviction. Might mean a higher court. But nothing will be heard unless there is never evidence that was not presented at the original trial / hearing. Some have you got anything different at all? Something that will change the outcome of a new hearing?

 

[Peter A]

I deleted those emails years ago. The guy left the company way back in 2010.

The main issue is to do with these women, and I'll probably have to call around for legal advice.

Like you said, I need evidence. They did not put anything in writing. Nobody who witnessed any of this will even vouch for me.

 

[Cuchculan]

I can only wish you all the best with this. Let us know how you get on. But from what I know of the law, no new evidence will mean what went before will stay the same. Only way to change anything would be to get new evidence that would prove that was said in court before was not true. You can't just say ' they were lying '. They will refute that. You need something solid to go on.

 

[Peter A]

Cool.

All the best to you for 2020!

 

[Joe diesel 09]

Why is all this on an anxiety forum? I don't get it.

 

[Cuchculan]

this was when he first posted and I tried to make sense of his actions. Only to see how wrong they all were. He did post other stuff. Some of which he had deleted because he dropped names of people in there in a way that could be used against him as slander under Scottish law. Harassment of a young female Scottish actress. Emailing her and telling her he knew where she lived. Threats and all that kind of stuff. No wonder he was convicted for his actions. But he still hasn't learned a thing. The stuff with the young actress is more modern and happened a while after he got out of prison. She was thinking of taking him to court for his harressment.

 

[Peter A]

Why is all this on an anxiety forum? I don't get it.

You tell me.

More importantly, what has compelled you to bump an inactive thread after like, 3 months?

 

[Cuchculan]

No escaping your past.

 

[Peter A]

That's not what I was asking him for.

 

[Joe diesel 09]

You tell me.

More importantly, what has compelled you to bump an inactive thread after like, 3 months?

Dude ain't none of that, not a single word of it got anything remotely to do with anxiety! Nothing. I wasn't "bumping" a old post. I simply wanted to know why all of it was here. And guess what? It intrigued me. Ive read everything you have posted here. All of it. There ain't anything your gonna find in an anxiety site that's gonna help you. Nothing. It reminded me of an incident happened around here bout 8 yrs ago, it didn't end well. Keep in mind we live in a rural area dotted with small communities. Everybody here knows everybody. Its different here than Scotland or anywhere else your from im sure. People notice things. They notice how people act, the things they do, the way they look at people. When a man is labeled strange, he is usually observed and watched by everyone. Typically we don't call the law around here. Where we live, we are the law. We protect our own, then we call the law. A guy starts actin weird, touchin people, sendin messages or emails things of that nature, it usually will not end well. Word to the wise brother petey, respect peoples privacy! There personal space, their homes, their jobs, keep your nose to yourself and see how much simpler life becomes for you. Haven't you learned that by now? You have been in jail how many times? Dude there just has to b more to this story than what we are getting. But I honestly wish you the best. I will pray for you that you get the help you need so that you can live a peaceful happiness filled life because you do deserve it. Everyone does. And life can truly b so good!! There are so many people here on this site who just wants to b happy and healthy and you are out there tied up in other peoples business and making an ass out of yourself. Don't put your business on here if you don't want people talkin about it. And you better be thankin the good Lord that you don't live here in the southern USA brother. Peace and love and all that stuff. Prayin for you.
reading all this mess did get me out of my own head for a bit tho! I feel much better. Distraction really is the key.

 

[Peter A]

O...K.

 

[Cuchculan]

@Joe diesel 09 we are now been called Trolls by Peter A. if you check out the profile page of @Izthewiz he made a comment about liking posts in his threads made by trolls. ( Us ) This has been his answer to everything that has been said to him by anybody on the net about how wrong his actions are. Instead of admitting his guilt and saying he botched up he tends to refer to us as trolls. You tried to be nice to him in your post. https://www.anxietycommunity.com/index.php?members/izthewiz.5155/#profile-post-comment-69

 

[Peter A]

Who told you about that comment anyway?

 

[Cuchculan]

No doubt you can delete it now and pretend you never posted it. But I read it earlier. None of us are Trolls. We are on an anxiety forum trying to help people with anxiety issues. Of which your post is not one of. That does not make us Trolls. We comment on what we read. Who wouldn't?

 

[Peter A]

I do have anxiety, and you shouldn't be going around saying people don't have something like anxiety, when I clearly do have anxious thoughts a lot.