I find that it comes in waves

[greeken]

Sometimes I will be so happy......Everything will be going my way and working out and I will love life.


Then come the dark times....I get just so...done with everything. I hate it.


Even worse, I hide it. From my husband and friends. I have been hurt trying to reach out to others......I just don't think they care enough or they don't know how to deal with it. They leave me.


Im trying to rewire my mind, but it is so hard. Right now especially is a dark time....I hope it passes quickly to a happy one. I live for those moments.

 

[Pandora]

My anxiety also comes in waves. Mine is normal triggered from stress. These stressors can be everyday life, being a single mother, looking for work, college exams or college in general. I too, am trying various ways to reprogram my brain but, I haven't had any luck yet. I have been suffering for anxiety for over 5 years and I thought once I got rid of some stressful situations things would be easier for me. However, my anxiety got worse. I hope your dark time pass quickly.

 

[pwarbi]

For many people, myself included I think they will be the same and the anxiety and/or depression will come and go and often for no apparent reason. I have my dark days when I have to even force myself to get out of bed and leave the house and other days when I love life and I'm the life and soul of the party. That in itself is a sign of anxiety and depression in itself though and while other people can maintain a balance, a neutral mood, people that have anxiety and depression can't and they will flip flop between mood swings. One day they'll be happy and the next, for no reason be down and upset and it's hard to find that balance.

 

[Bea]

My depression (more specifically, my manic-depressive disorder, or bipolar disorder, whatever you want to call it) is the same. I think it's important to be as productive as you can during the happy times, and to surround yourself as much as you can with things and people that help support you. When I'm happy, I don't take it for granted; I realize that eventually I won't be as happy, and try my best to write happy notes for the future me, the me who will be incredibly depressed, the me who won't be able to get out of bed, even if to just take a shower. It helps to see the notes. Whenever I'm sad, I can just read them and be reminded that I've had happy times too, and that I just need to get myself out of bed, to get myself clean and smelling nice, and maybe then I'll start being happy again.

 

[pwarbi]

My depression (more specifically' date=' my manic-depressive disorder, or bipolar disorder, whatever you want to call it) is the same. I think it's important to be as productive as you can during the happy times, and to surround yourself as much as you can with things and people that help support you. When I'm happy, I don't take it for granted; I realize that eventually I won't be as happy, and try my best to write happy notes for the future me, the me who will be incredibly depressed, the me who won't be able to get out of bed, even if to just take a shower. It helps to see the notes. Whenever I'm sad, I can just read them and be reminded that I've had happy times too, and that I just need to get myself out of bed, to get myself clean and smelling nice, and maybe then I'll start being happy again. [/quote']
That's great advice and it's important to when you're going through the bad times that you remember that it will pass and you won't be that way forever. In the bad times then just do what you can to get by in life and do the basic things, like you say get up, get showered, get dressed, eat...carry on with life the best way that you can until the fog clears again and you start to feel happier in yourself again. For me that's exactly how it feels and it's like a fog comes over my life and I start to feel distant from people and I lose my way. I have to drag myself back to reality again and while others can snap themselves out of a bad mood, mine lingers on and on and if I don't catch myself before I fall too deep it can last for days.

 

[Bea]

That's great advice and it's important to when you're going through the bad times that you remember that it will pass and you won't be that way forever. In the bad times then just do what you can to get by in life and do the basic things, like you say get up, get showered, get dressed, eat...carry on with life the best way that you can until the fog clears again and you start to feel happier in yourself again. For me that's exactly how it feels and it's like a fog comes over my life and I start to feel distant from people and I lose my way. I have to drag myself back to reality again and while others can snap themselves out of a bad mood, mine lingers on and on and if I don't catch myself before I fall too deep it can last for days.

I feel like going through the motions also helps when it comes to depression. I have a routine I've set up months ago, when I started to come out of a depressive state that lasted months. These days that routine helps keep me on track, especially on darker days. Even if you just go through the motions, some part of your brain will be pleased because you did something, you were productive that day, that sort of thing. That's why habit is so important for people with depression - on bad days your habits and your medication will be the things to get you out of bed so you can do something, and doing something is the first step on the road to clearing out that fog.

 

[Alex]

Sometimes I will be so happy......Everything will be going my way and working out and I will love life.
Then come the dark times....I get just so...done with everything. I hate it.


Even worse, I hide it. From my husband and friends. I have been hurt trying to reach out to others......I just don't think they care enough or they don't know how to deal with it. They leave me.


Im trying to rewire my mind, but it is so hard. Right now especially is a dark time....I hope it passes quickly to a happy one. I live for those moments.

I think many of us have good and bad day, but few of us will admit the bad days, because no one wishes to burden others.


As for friends, to be honest most people don't know how to deal with it, so rather than say something wrong they leave things because someone can make things worse.


I had a friend who was bad and we were having a meal with a neighbor when she broke down. Her neighbor tried to help but made things worse with what she said, so she decided to get up leave in the middle of the meal.


The dark times are hard, and each of us finds different ways to cope. I hope today is a lighter one for you.

 

[fuzyon]

I think you have what is called a "bipolar disorder" which means you sometimes feel really happy but sometimes you feel incredibly upset and irritated, I have it too and it's pretty weird. At night I'm always pumped to do stuff and in general happy but throughout the day I'm usually depressed and I keep to myself most of the time, it comes in waves indeed. I guess what we have to do is deal with it.

 

[mariaanca]

Even worse, I hide it. From my husband and friends. I have been hurt trying to reach out to others......I just don't think they care enough or they don't know how to deal with it. They leave me.


Im trying to rewire my mind, but it is so hard. Right now especially is a dark time....I hope it passes quickly to a happy one. I live for those moments.

Hello Greeken!


I think it's important to share your problems with at least one person close to you. I'm sure you will get the support that you need. When I get in dark times I try to watch to motivational videos and I feel a little better. Then I remind myself that everything is going to get better, and eventually it does.

 

[pwarbi]

I do agree that sharing your problems can help, and as the saying goes, no man is an island, but at the same time there are a lot of people that simply don't have that support around them and they genuinely don't have anybody that they can talk to and share their problems with. That's why I think it's just as important to be able to deal with issues yourself as well and while I'm not saying bottle things up, but just try and sit down on your own and come up with a plan of action that you know you'll be able to stick to when that dark cloud comes over us.


We can'r simply go crying to others every time we start to feel a little down and depressed because when you yourself are feeling that way it's all too easy ti get wrapped up in your own problems and sometimes the person we start to rely on will have their own things to deal with so won't be able to always be there for us. We all may need a person to rely on, but we also have to be strong enough to be able to rely on ourselves first and foremost.

 

[Bea]

I do agree that sharing your problems can help, and as the saying goes, no man is an island, but at the same time there are a lot of people that simply don't have that support around them and they genuinely don't have anybody that they can talk to and share their problems with. That's why I think it's just as important to be able to deal with issues yourself as well and while I'm not saying bottle things up, but just try and sit down on your own and come up with a plan of action that you know you'll be able to stick to when that dark cloud comes over us.
We can'r simply go crying to others every time we start to feel a little down and depressed because when you yourself are feeling that way it's all too easy ti get wrapped up in your own problems and sometimes the person we start to rely on will have their own things to deal with so won't be able to always be there for us. We all may need a person to rely on, but we also have to be strong enough to be able to rely on ourselves first and foremost.

Yes, this is really good food for thought!


I think this is why keeping a journal greatly helps too - it's pretty much the same as going to someone to rant to them about your problems and whatnot, but at the same time it isn't. If you feel like you're bothering people by approaching them, or if you feel like you don't want to interact with anyone, but you still need to rant, letting it all out on a journal helps. You don't even have to physically write it down. You can type it on your computer; you can set up a blog just for yourself and write your thoughts down.


When you write your thoughts and feelings down, sometimes you realize that your problems aren't as big as your mental illness is making them out to be. And this is really helpful for when you want to move forward and conquer your mental illness.

 

[pwarbi]

It's only natural to get overwhelmed sometimes by our problems, and when we are dealing with depression and anxiety that just gets magnified. The small problems that every person as and can deal with, we tend to make more out of than what is necessary and even the small things can cause us major worry, even hen really there isn't that much to worry about. Like you say, sometimes just clearing your thoughts out of your head and onto a computer screen or a piece of paper can then make you physically see that things really aren't as bad as what we are thinking, and puts our problems into perspective.

 

[ineedmystrength]

My depression acts in the same way. It comes in waves. Something always feels like it's weighing part of me down, but I can usually work through it and feel happy. It is just under certain instances when the feelings of depression and anxiety are magnified. Sometimes, my depression flares with weather changes, which is hard especially when I'm at university, because I still have to go to classes and do work when all I want to do is sleep because I just feel so run down and tired. I deal with it on a day to day basis with medication, talk therapy, writing in my journal, and riding my horse. Doing those things seems to keep the symptoms at bay--at the very least, they make the illness seem not so severe.

 

[pwarbi]

My depression acts in the same way. It comes in waves. Something always feels like it's weighing part of me down' date=' but I can usually work through it and feel happy. It is just under certain instances when the feelings of depression and anxiety are magnified. Sometimes, my depression flares with weather changes, which is hard especially when I'm at university, because I still have to go to classes and do work when all I want to do is sleep because I just feel so run down and tired. I deal with it on a day to day basis with medication, talk therapy, writing in my journal, and riding my horse. Doing those things seems to keep the symptoms at bay--at the very least, they make the illness seem not so severe. [/quote']
Well it sounds like you have managed to get yourself into a routine and that helps you to control your waves of depression ineedmystrength and I think that goes a long way to helping you get through the down days. People who suffer from anxiety and depression often need to find a routine that works for them, and what works for you for example won't work for me and I have to find my own way of helping myself. I can't ride a horse for one thing, haha!

 

[Pandora]

I am glad that you have found ways to deal with your depression Ineed. Many of us wish we could just figure out what has caused the depression for that day. I know I am one of those people that struggle to pin point what has caused my depression to flare up for a moment. I know do an self-analyze my aid me in unlocking what caused my depressive feelings, however, just trying to find the time to do an self-analyze is sometimes a burden also. I know being with nature aids the mind in cleaning and relaxation. I tend to walk a lot to clear my mind up.

 

[imosher]

I get the "waves" as well, I also get happy waves. especially in social situations. I call it my social clarity, moments where I am totally comfortable in groups, mingling making friends. In these moments not only am I comfortable with dancing around the room talking with people I have never even met, I am good at it, often becoming somewhat of a focal point in the various conversations. The problem, it is a wave I can be in the middle of my social clairvoyance and all of a sudden it leaves, and I am left with attention and expectations to be funny but without the skill. As annoying as it is to be left stranded by my brain, I still find that I appreciate these moments, sorta light at the end of the anxiety tunnel. The same happens with the dark times, and I often find comfort in that the time in finite and will soon be gone. It has been said but when a dark time in looming, I will often go for a run or at least get out of the house, I find that this (for me) shortens the episode. Watching TV for me is the worst thing I can do ever if I am feeling depressed, it defiantly prolongs the dark feelings.