How do you motivate yourself to do housework?

Aree Wongwanlee · Aug 28, 2016

Oh my gosh. I HEAR YOU. Seriously, there have been times I've called a friend and said, "Are you free? Can you come over in an hour, just so I'm motivated to clean?" They say, "Oh you don't need to clean up for me." I say, "I know. You're a good friend. But having company motivates me and motivation is what I need right now."

After hardcore cleaning, they come and we get to visit and have tea and it's such a nice reward! (I'm an extrovert, so socializing is a good reward for me!)

This is an interesting way to get motivated. Maybe I should consider inviting a friend over once a week. That way, I would feel more excited about keeping my place clean and tidy. Hmmm, maybe I should consider getting a lady friend again. It has been years since I had any lady friends. If I get a lady friend, I might even decide to put on proper clothes. Oh yes, men also dress up when they meet their lady friends.

fcuco · Aug 28, 2016

I listened to a podcast where they were doing an interview to this woman that does research on what motivates and how to motivate people. Serious stuff, she usually does seminars at Google and stuff like that. During her research they came up with an interesting concept: "temptation bundling". This is how it works, you take something that you really really love to do and don't need any motivation to do it and force yourself to only do it at the same time or as a reward for doing the things that you need to do but can't find the motivation to do. For example, I listen to a lot of podcasts but I force myself to do it only while working out, so I bundle the reward with the action that requires motivation and end up enjoying my workouts even more since I associate them with caching up with my favorite shows.

You could do something similar, only watch your favorite show when you are doing laundry, stuff like that, you are the only person that knows what will work for you and the type of activities that you could combine.

kelden · Aug 28, 2016

I leave the music player on blasting while I do my housework, but only when I'm doing some intensive cleanup. I got a mild obsessive compulsive tendency in regards of keeping household nice, organized and clean. When I spot some filth or a thing out of place, I would go ahead and attempt to clean it immediately. For me, to see everything in place, nice and clean is enough reward to keep up with the habit of cleaning. Although I don't clean that often, fortunately , I also don't spend much time on it since I live on a small flat.

KellyLake · Aug 29, 2016

I have always been pretty terrible at keeping up with housework as well. The method that works for me is keeping a day planner - I swear I would be useless without that thing. Something about physically having a daily list and crossing it off (as opposed to keeping one digitally), and having something to reference during the day really appeals to my brain and my need to categorize things. I keep all appointments, important dates, tasks I want to complete that day, even things like washing my hair - it all goes in the planner. Whatever I don't finish that day I roll over to the next day. I never try to put too much on my to-do list on any one day, though.

When I am in a severe depression spell I will look at it this way - if the bird's cage needs to be cleaned, thats my goal for the day. I don't care if I get dressed that day, do anything else, as long as I complete that one task. Sounds like it's setting the bar pretty low, but if you're having a paralyzing bout of depression then just making one task a priority and actually finishing it feels like a real triumph.

LovelyLiz · Aug 29, 2016

Oh my gosh. I HEAR YOU. Seriously, there have been times I've called a friend and said, "Are you free? Can you come over in an hour, just so I'm motivated to clean?" They say, "Oh you don't need to clean up for me." I say, "I know. You're a good friend. But having company motivates me and motivation is what I need right now."

After hardcore cleaning, they come and we get to visit and have tea and it's such a nice reward! (I'm an extrovert, so socializing is a good reward for me!)

In my case it just tends to be that I let things slip slightly, and keep slipping, until I need to do a big tidy up for a friend.

I don't ever do it deliberately, but maybe I need to start doing that!

janemariesayed · Aug 31, 2016

Not having the will power to do housework is a symptom of depression. For a sufferer, housework can be a real effort even though we may want to live in a clean and tidy place. A couple of years ago I developed a way to deal with the housework when I am feeling depressed. Firstly, I don't worry about it. If I see the sink is full of dishes that need washing and I am feeling at a low ebb, I just tell myself that it's okay. I may not be sick physically and prevented from doing the chore, but I am sick mentally and that does prevent me from doing the chore. So I decide to leave it until I am ready and wait for the time or day that my mind lets me. I tell myself one step at a time, so it may just be one dish or one piece of furniture dusted. Often, if I am watching television I create a bit of fun with myself, wait for the adverts to come on and rush to the kitchen and do as much as I can in that short space of time.

17emilyhalko · Aug 31, 2016

I find it very hard to find the motivation to do work sometimes. I'm a wreck, really, and my clutter around me shows it! Very occasionally, I do have the whim to clean, but this is only when I'm upset. Focusing on my work helps me keep my mind off of everything else that is bothering me. Sometimes, sorting through my stuff just feels good, because as I'm getting rid of some of my old stuff, I'm progressing in a way, getting rid of some of my bad memories, or just growing up, however you'd like to look at it. Sometimes to be motivated, you just have to have a certain goal in mind. Maybe say to yourself, "If I wash the dishes, I can have a piece of cake" or something like that. Reward yourself for the work you do with relaxation and other things.

whysewserious · Aug 31, 2016

When I hit my slumps, I do things in shifts - start with something fun, then do a bit of work, and alternate. Sometimes I find myself getting in to a rhythm with the chores and I really like the way it feels to have something complete. Once I make it to that first feel-good "task accomplished", it begins to make it easier to keep going. I will even set an alarm on my phone to go off every half hour as a reminder.

nimue · Aug 31, 2016

My sister found a trick on a website and told me about it (she never sent me the link, so I can't cite it - sorry!). They recommended doing something they call 20-10s, where you clean for 20 minutes and rest for 10. You're supposed to set a goal, like today I'm going to do one 20-10 in the bathroom and two 20-10s in the kitchen. You clean as much as you can during those 20 minutes, and don't worry about what didn't get done until your next cleaning day. When I'm in a really bad slump, I set my goal to 5-10s. I tell myself that 5 minutes really isn't that long. 5 minutes is less time than it takes to watch a YouTube video. I can clean for 5 minutes, rest for 10. After that, I tell myself that the last 5 minutes really wasn't that bad, then clean 5 more minutes. If that's all that gets done, that's okay because at least it's a little cleaner than it was when I started.

When I get really overwhelmed with the amount of work that needs to be done in the house, I try to remember that the house didn't get messy in a day so it doesn't need to be cleaned in one either.

HappyKoi · Aug 31, 2016

I have that problem, too. I try and remind myself that I feel better when my space is de-cluttered and clean, but even then motivation is hard. I try to divide a room or a space into sections. I tell myself that I'll clean that one section or area, such as the space by the closet or just cleaning the sink, and then see how I feel. Usually, once I get going, I find myself wanting to do the next, and the next... but sometimes one section is enough, and I take a rest until the next day. If you look at it as a big project, it's really easy to get overwhelmed and give up.

d.moore11100 · Sep 2, 2016

It's always easier for me to continue cleaning than to start cleaning. This is because I find myself putting aside my own problems and focusing entirely upon the housework at hand. Although it is very difficult for me to start up cleaning when I am depressed because I just want to lay in my bed and pout about my situation, it is impossible for me to stop half way so when I start, I finish too.

Zeesi · Sep 2, 2016

I really enjoy the art of homemaking, and with that comes the "work", but sometimes the work isn't so easy to do, like you said.

It is interesting to read that so many people here have problems with getting housework done. I have a problem with it too sometimes, but my love of interior decorating and homemaking takes over at some point and I get to work, using many of the techniques written about by various people here.

Sometimes I'll do just a little bit at a time. I've found one of the most effective ways to do this particular cleaning method is turn to a TV show that I like, maybe like a 2-hour long Hallmark movie (LOVE those) and I'll clean during the commercials. If I happen to watch 2 movies back-to-back, so much so the better.

The great part about this method is that it doesn't even have to be done during every single commercial break, it can be every other commercial. I've cleaned my bathroom like this, I've cleaned my kitchen like this, vacuumed the floor, mopped the kitchen. I love this method of cleaning and have been doing it for years.

I also use the company-coming-over method. This is particularly helpful if I find myself in a slump and just don't want to do anything. When I know someone is coming over, it takes the guesswork out of "what should I do first?' I just go through the house and tidy up as fast as I can.

How does one know if it is depression and not laziness?

dandom · Sep 3, 2016

For me, it tends to build up a lot before I finally get to it. If I'm having an especially bad week, my dishes will just pile up and I'll leave clothing all over the bedroom. It's especially difficult living along because there's no one to push you to make an effort, but at the same time, that pushing is really difficult when you want to clean but you just can't and the other person doesn't understand that you're not just being lazy.

Like a few others have mentioned here, I also find that my best motivation is to invite someone over at least once a week because that pushes me to tidy up. Not to mention having someone come over usually helps my mood too, because I feel a lot worse when I realize it's been weeks since I've had a visitor.

mkhl · Sep 3, 2016

I put this mindset that when I have to do something around the house, I just do it right there and then. I stop thinking if I should do it now or late because I'm sure the more I think about it, the more it will be postponed. This helps me to start immediately and forget about everything but just the cleaning.

beautifullybree · Sep 7, 2016

Hey love! t I'm concerned that you motivate yourself with negative consequences. I'm even more concerned that your boyfriend gets mad if you're struggling with it. That's really, really not cool. I know it's not my business, but when you hear that someone is in that kind of relationship, you have an obligation to point out the major red flags you see.

Don't motivate yourself with fear, my friend. Read these other awesome responses about techniques and rewards to push yourself! This will help you in the long term!

What do you think?

Thank you so much for your concern. That truly tugs in my heart strings. Fortunately my boyfriend isn't mean or anything of the sorts. I supposed I could have chose my wording more carefully. He does expect me to do the majority if the housework since I'm a stay at home companion for him. I mean it more in a he would be displeased that he pulled his end of the bargain and I didn't . I would feel the same If he slacked at work risking our lively hood. Once again thank you so much for your kind words and I'm looking forward to trying some positive reinforcement.

explorerX7 · Sep 7, 2016

I have found that whenever there is work to be done around the home the best thing to do is start out as soon as I am up or as early as possible because whenever I delay I may fall into this lax mode and find it a bit difficult, to gather up the energy to do the job. However, whenever, I start early I find that I gradually increase the momentum as I go along.

How do you motivate yourself to do housework?

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