Hi!

[GoodLife]

I already posted an "introduction" but it didn't really encompass me very much so I am giving it another go.

I am a young girl with a lot going on. I am not currently diagnosed with anything but I have very high speculations that I have some sort of social anxiety disorder along with general anxiety. I also have many of the social and emotional signs of OCD and ADHD. I have many rules and rituals that I do because I fear that if I don't something terrible will happen to me or my loved ones. I often find myself holding things down for an unnecessary amount of time such as keys on a keyboard, doorbells, even snooze buttons on an alarm clock. I am also very forgetful and so I am always forgetting my rituals and remembering them later, only to obsess over them for the rest of the day because I forgot them. I am a very sensitive person and a very powerful empath, to the point that my entire personality changes to reflect the energy of those I am around. I also will contract symptoms of illness that I know a friend has but go to the doctor to get checked out only to find there is nothing wrong. I even had a friend who broke her arm while with me and she claims it didn't hurt her at all but I felt immense pain in my forearm where I later found out she had broken both her bones and I even began crying because it hurt so bad. I have 4 siblings, all younger than me and I am often charged with watching them while my parents are out or just don't want to deal with them. This is immensely stressful to me and often leaves me almost in tears by the end. I have never told my parents about this for fear that they will get mad at me or I will become a hardship. I am bisexual and recently came out to my very Christian, very unsupportive parents. I am terrified of being singled out for any reason, good or bad. I have faked tests and "forgotten" homework so I don't get recognized by the teacher. I have a weird effect on things such as cards, dice, and any other things of chance. I can often predict the next card in a card game or even think about the card I need and it will come up, including specific cards in specific suits. I also have large amounts of Deja Vu almost every day, to the point where I know up to a minute of a movie I have never seen before, or know how something will happen before it happens.

I know this wasn't all anxiety-related but if anyone can relate to me on any of these things please tell me.

 

[Cuchculan]

Your parents will still love you no matter what. They might want to try and want to make sense about what you told them. Which is normal. Parents think they know everything about their kids. Then they are told something they had no idea about at all. Might confuse them at first. The love will still be there.

Love the knowing what card or dice number will come up next. How often does that work for you? just thinking of the odds in my head here. Thinking if this was the case and you believe you can do this, would you not put it to the test in some other way that might earn you some cash? Thinking blackjack here. Test it out at home first. See how often you can call the next deal. If you should call, stick or fold. Play ten games and see how many games you can win.

Rest seems typical OCD. What is the worst thing you think will happen if you don't do one of your rituals? Like will something change if you don't hold the snooze button down for a long time? Or the key on a keyboard. More tests for you to do. To prove nothing will happen if you break from a ritual. Life will just go on as normal.

 

[GoodLife]

Your parents will still love you no matter what. They might want to try and want to make sense about what you told them. Which is normal. Parents think they know everything about their kids. Then they are told something they had no idea about at all. Might confuse them at first. The love will still be there.

Love the knowing what card or dice number will come up next. How often does that work for you? just thinking of the odds in my head here. Thinking if this was the case and you believe you can do this, would you not put it to the test in some other way that might earn you some cash? Thinking blackjack here. Test it out at home first. See how often you can call the next deal. If you should call, stick or fold. Play ten games and see how many games you can win.

Rest seems typical OCD. What is the worst thing you think will happen if you don't do one of your rituals? Like will something change if you don't hold the snooze button down for a long time? Or the key on a keyboard. More tests for you to do. To prove nothing will happen if you break from a ritual. Life will just go on as normal.

Thank you so much Cuchculan! I play poker with my friends (for fun, not betting), and probably 90% of the time I am able to predict the next card, if not get exactly the card I need. My friends are often calling cheats on me.
As for the long holding things, I don't think it is so much OCD related as much as it is just comforting to me.

 

[Cuchculan]

Can you count cards? This is illegal in Vegas and all other such places. You keep track of what has already been dealt out. In your head. So you know how many of a certain number of cards have been used already. That takes a lot of skill. Certain people can do it without having to learn the skill involved. Great film called 21. Blackjack film. They are a team who count cards. They know when the odds are with them. So they bet big money. The table would be hot. Cold table you walk away and don't bet no more because the odds are against you. We also saw this skill in the film Rain Man. Maybe you simply have that skill. Or with you if a person had a deck of cards and asked you to guess the 6th card in the deck, would you be able to? That would be big time different as no other cards would have been on view. With card counting you see other cards and can rule them out. Look up card counting on you tube. Amazing how they do it. The mind has to work very fast.

 

[GoodLife]

Can you count cards? This is illegal in Vegas and all other such places. You keep track of what has already been dealt out. In your head. So you know how many of a certain number of cards have been used already. That takes a lot of skill. Certain people can do it without having to learn the skill involved. Great film called 21. Blackjack film. They are a team who count cards. They know when the odds are with them. So they bet big money. The table would be hot. Cold table you walk away and don't bet no more because the odds are against you. We also saw this skill in the film Rain Man. Maybe you simply have that skill. Or with you if a person had a deck of cards and asked you to guess the 6th card in the deck, would you be able to? That would be big time different as no other cards would have been on view. With card counting you see other cards and can rule them out. Look up card counting on you tube. Amazing how they do it. The mind has to work very fast.

I have never experimented very much with this ability but card counting sounds cool, I wonder if I would be good at it. I do have a good memory.

 

[Joshua1]

I am bisexual and recently came out to my very Christian, very unsupportive parents.

I guess you could form a good relationship with your parents. If my son was bisexual or gay. I would disagree with him, but i would still love him and support my when he wanted it. Form a good relationship with your parents.