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HEPATITIS fear has returned and is really scaring me

maryam

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Hi,
Since Tuesday I've been having this pain under my right rib, its pressure and aching that would get severe at times. I have IBS so I contributed the pain to that. Over the last few days I've upped my probiotics and fiber and throughout the pain I never had any loose stools or constipation. The pain still wouldn't ease up completely and would come and go, It feels better when I eat and I have no acid reflux or stomach distress. so I went in the doctor today nervous about a UTI even though I don't have symptoms. WHEN I peed my pee WAS dark yellow which is NOT the usual for me I always had clear pee . No UTI and even though the pee was on the darker side I hd no dehydration according to the doctor.I made the mistake of googling pee colors which say liver or kidney problems are to blame. I DID get a pretty small butterfly tattoo coverup 4 weeks ago and the place I go to used new needles is clean on the inside and is licensed reputable shop. I've gotten two tattoos their before. I'm now scared that I have contracted hepatitis from my tattoo and I have bad anxiety. I remember thinking I would get hepatitis and being to scared for my first tattoo there. When I googled hepatitis it does say Pain in the right side underneath the ribcage and dark urine as symptoms but I don't have fever or lack of appetite or any that. My doctor said she is going to do an ultrasound to see if my kidneys and gallbladder are okay. I'm 21 and never had any kidney issues before nor gallbladder. Today the pain has subsided but since its on and off I'm not sure if it will return. I'M SO scared of having hepatitis even though I didn't go to a weird tattoo parlor that Is unsanitary. I know this sounds strange but I checked my pee now a couple hours later and it is pretty clear. But I keep thinking well you have pain under your right rib cage and you had dark pee and you just got a tattoo you must have hepatitis now. Hepatitis lives on surfaces for days so now I am scared.I don't even want a blood test cause I'm too scared to know
 

RobbyH

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Drink nothing but water for a couple of days and drink a fair amount each day and see if that clers it up. I have noticed if I don't drink a fair anmount of water each day, my urine will be darker. One thing that might ease your mind - typically if you have a medical issue causing a particular symptom, the symptom doesn't come and go so you would have dark urine almost every time and not clear one time and dark the next.

Good luck
 

maryam

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Drink nothing but water for a couple of days and drink a fair amount each day and see if that clers it up. I have noticed if I don't drink a fair anmount of water each day, my urine will be darker. One thing that might ease your mind - typically if you have a medical issue causing a particular symptom, the symptom doesn't come and go so you would have dark urine almost every time and not clear one time and dark the next.

Good luck
Thanks Robby appreciate your support and kind words. Thanks for always commenting on my stuff with some advice and reassurance. I truly appreciate it.
 

RobbyH

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Glad to help. I have struggled with HA since I was 18 - I am now 59 so I have expereinced a lot of what folks here are going through now. I have found a couple of things over the years that has helped and I like to help the otehrs who are like me

1) Stay off google and WebMD - the first thing we do when we have an ailment is we google it and of course all we see is the one bad thing it could be and ignore the 99 others things that are common or not as bad.

2) Once we get a "symptom" of a disease or the disease in our mind, that disease takes over our life - it is all we thing about and of course the more we thing about it, the more the symptom of the disease shows up

3) HA is not just something you can let go of or ignore - it is a real "disease" that can't be "put out of our mind" as we are so often told. The fear consumes us even though we often know deep down inside that what we are worryign about is most likely not going to be the outcome BUT we can't let it go and having folks tell us "not to worry about it" really does very little for any period of time.

But probably the biggest thing I have learned about HA is that we can not rationalize our own fears but we can someone else's. For example, I can look at your fear of hepatitis and see it as an unreasonable fear that you are basing on a symptom that could be of many different things - most benign: however, if it were me struggling with the fear, I could not rationalize it for myself. We can see how unwarranted the fear is in someone else but not ourselves. I guess that is why I try to respond to folks is because me knowing that, I realize they can't look at it rationally because the struggle is real to thema nd I would never downplay that fear.

HA isn't fun but it can be addressed with medicine, etc. I went nearly 40 years before I sought help because of the stigma of "mental illness". When I finally broke down and got some help, it has made a world of difference. I am NOT where I want tobe yet but I can slowly see myself getting there.
 

maryam

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Jun 13, 2018
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Glad to help. I have struggled with HA since I was 18 - I am now 59 so I have expereinced a lot of what folks here are going through now. I have found a couple of things over the years that has helped and I like to help the otehrs who are like me

1) Stay off google and WebMD - the first thing we do when we have an ailment is we google it and of course all we see is the one bad thing it could be and ignore the 99 others things that are common or not as bad.

2) Once we get a "symptom" of a disease or the disease in our mind, that disease takes over our life - it is all we thing about and of course the more we thing about it, the more the symptom of the disease shows up

3) HA is not just something you can let go of or ignore - it is a real "disease" that can't be "put out of our mind" as we are so often told. The fear consumes us even though we often know deep down inside that what we are worryign about is most likely not going to be the outcome BUT we can't let it go and having folks tell us "not to worry about it" really does very little for any period of time.

But probably the biggest thing I have learned about HA is that we can not rationalize our own fears but we can someone else's. For example, I can look at your fear of hepatitis and see it as an unreasonable fear that you are basing on a symptom that could be of many different things - most benign: however, if it were me struggling with the fear, I could not rationalize it for myself. We can see how unwarranted the fear is in someone else but not ourselves. I guess that is why I try to respond to folks is because me knowing that, I realize they can't look at it rationally because the struggle is real to thema nd I would never downplay that fear.

HA isn't fun but it can be addressed with medicine, etc. I went nearly 40 years before I sought help because of the stigma of "mental illness". When I finally broke down and got some help, it has made a world of difference. I am NOT where I want tobe yet but I can slowly see myself getting there.
 

maryam

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Hi Robby I just saw this.
Thank you very much for taking the time to write out some tips. I too know how hard it is when people say "just move on, Just forget about it". it's very hard for me to just move on and forget about it because like you said people with HEALTH anxiety get stuck and think that 1 out of a million could be them. I've also been struggling with this since I was 18 as well, had bouts here and there but it started full blown at 18 and now I'm 21. The fear I have about Meningitis is the most crippling one because it is constant. I also take a low dose anti anxiety medication and have been going to therapy intensively. I feel so stuck. I had mentioned in one of my posts that I have avoided kissing my boyfriend for a year now out of fear of getting meningitis. The first time I watched a video on it was enough to scar me. I think since I am a deeply empathetic person, I put myself in everyones shoes too much and that's what I did in that case with the meningitis video/many VIDEOS I saw. If my boyfriend coughs or sneezes or spits out the window I will be consumed with the thought for the next 7 days ( since that is the incubation period for meningitis) that I will end up with it. Its like I'm constantly preparing myself for it as if its this villain thats going to show up eventually. I see the rareness of the disease. I even checked the surveillance and in the year of 2018 there has only been 1 CASE in the South Bay cities in California (which is wear I reside) but still I think well it could be me. My boyfriend spat out the window, coughed and sneezed around me this weekend..I have been having achy legs since this morning pretty on and off but hasn't eased up. I take a lot of vitamins and drink electrolytes so its nor dehydration I used a bunch of muscle rubs and still leg calf achiness. Of course now I'm sure its the meningitis thats causing the leg pain and am scared to sleep thinking I'm gonna wake up with a fever tomorrow and headache and just all these scary thoughts. I am so TIRED of this constant fear of meningitis. In high school I shared drinks with everyone, kissed and dated guys that lived in college and in dorms and did not get meningitis but now my bf lives at home, plays basketball with his friends a couple days a week, and shares a drink with his sister once 1 time a few months ago(she lives in a dorm) and I am CONVINCED that he must be an asymptomatic carrier since meningitis is spread mainly through asymptomatic carriers who don't ever get sick themselves,

I just want to feel free again.
Not think about spit contaminated me..
But it makes me happy
that there are people like you I can talk to
that understand
:)
 
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