Health Anxiety and Bad Relationship

[chickentender]

My relationship is in the toilet and my anxiety is higher from a bad situation. When I do have a health fear, my partner screams at me or mocks me. The mistreatment is always only verbal, but it's not changing- it gets better for a bit and then worse again. I have been in my relationship for many years and live with my partner.

I have reached out to my family to talk through a plan if I choose to leave. They didn't approve of me moving in with my partner and they also abused me when I was a child. They tell me that I got myself into this mess, I have to get myself back out whatever it means, they can't help me,.

I don't have other people to help me. My partner has started going to therapy, we have been in couples therapy on and off for years also. Right now, I feel I am approaching the end of being able to deal with this though.

I have PTSD from an accident that sparked my health anxiety and depression. I do not drive as a result of my PTSD. I have to move back to where I came from to survive without driving, but I can't afford it. I have worked for myself for years and would have to find an outside job to support myself and I don't know if I could make rents for even a room where I would be going. I don't know if I am able to hold a job down very well with my PTSD as I haven't worked for anyone else for years.

My cat is the one thing that gets me through all of this and if I left, there is no way I can leave him. He has helped me in my battle with my mental health struggles so much and I love him. He is the one being in my life who has ever given me unconditional love and I care about him so much.

My health anxiety is spiking tonight (worrying I am going to die of an allergic reaction as my scalp is itching like crazy either from stress or a shampoo I used and I keep sneezing) as I look over rooms for rent and try to figure out how I'm going to work this if I leave as I have no one my life who can help me get on my feet. I'm also worrying about what would be best for my cat and what is even possible at all. I just need to sleep and I can't. Only my therapist and one close friend knows and my parents since I went to them for help. It's hard to keep this all inside...thanks if you read this.

 

[He Man]

My relationship is in the toilet and my anxiety is higher from a bad situation. When I do have a health fear, my partner screams at me or mocks me. The mistreatment is always only verbal, but it's not changing- it gets better for a bit and then worse again. I have been in my relationship for many years and live with my partner.

I have reached out to my family to talk through a plan if I choose to leave. They didn't approve of me moving in with my partner and they also abused me when I was a child. They tell me that I got myself into this mess, I have to get myself back out whatever it means, they can't help me,.

I don't have other people to help me. My partner has started going to therapy, we have been in couples therapy on and off for years also. Right now, I feel I am approaching the end of being able to deal with this though.

I have PTSD from an accident that sparked my health anxiety and depression. I do not drive as a result of my PTSD. I have to move back to where I came from to survive without driving, but I can't afford it. I have worked for myself for years and would have to find an outside job to support myself and I don't know if I could make rents for even a room where I would be going. I don't know if I am able to hold a job down very well with my PTSD as I haven't worked for anyone else for years.

My cat is the one thing that gets me through all of this and if I left, there is no way I can leave him. He has helped me in my battle with my mental health struggles so much and I love him. He is the one being in my life who has ever given me unconditional love and I care about him so much.

My health anxiety is spiking tonight (worrying I am going to die of an allergic reaction as my scalp is itching like crazy either from stress or a shampoo I used and I keep sneezing) as I look over rooms for rent and try to figure out how I'm going to work this if I leave as I have no one my life who can help me get on my feet. I'm also worrying about what would be best for my cat and what is even possible at all. I just need to sleep and I can't. Only my therapist and one close friend knows and my parents since I went to them for help. It's hard to keep this all inside...thanks if you read this.

Tender, you're right.. it is very hard to keep suffering 'all inside'. This forum is a pretty good place for sharing your experience (& commiserating).
We're listening; and I'm praying for your peace of mind.

I hope u stay together with your cat. They are good companions. My wife has forced a couple cats on me over the years, and they've turned out to be good friends.. keep us posted.

 

[Mandyhiero]

I’m so sorry you’re going through this. If you have never suffered with anxiety then it’s hard to understand. My husband and I have been married for 10 years and my health anxiety didn’t start until a few years into our marriage, but it’s taken up until the last year for him to finally see that what I feel, I have no control over. He sees the misery I go through and he finally gets it. I hate it for anyone that doesn’t have that support. I’ve been there. I just want to let you know that you’re in my thoughts and prayers!

 

[Howlingvapor]

That’s really tough man, I hope you find peace soon. It can be hard going through hell when you have anxiety. Just remember even someone without anxiety in your situation right now probably wouldn’t be sleeping much either so you just keep fighting man. I know it can be rough being with someone who doesn’t understand what you’re going though. People can be cruel to those they don’t understand. If you decide to leave her just remember you’re worth more than this. You deserve better. You don’t have to find someone that understands everything you’re going through because no one ever truly will. You just need to find someone willing to listen without judgment and be support you through your struggles. Maybe that person can be her, if she’s willing to change, but in my experience people can only realistically change so much. So just remember that at a certain point the change isn’t enough and you may have to cut your losses and find someone that truly cares about you.

You seem like a smart guy with a good head on your shoulders. You’ll find someone that’ll treat you right trust me.


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