GYM. I always have problems with gym...

[Guest]

I have really bad social anxiety. Well, maybe not REALLY bad, because I can sometime function in bad situations, but I just started school and I was put in a gym class where I know absolutely NO ONE. Not a single person in that class is someone that I have had previous friendships or even really knows of me. I kind of just sit there by myself. Everyone is already in their little friend groups and I always feel like I can never intrude on that. They just give off that vibe. I have NO idea what to do about this... Have any of you guys ever run into this problem before? I need major help... I'm ready to just... Do online schooling.

 

[Guest]

I can't really offer any great help. It's 25 years since I was in school, and I only realized in hindsight how much social anxiety I experienced.


I only have one, probably useless, suggestion. It's a suggestion I will give to my son, who is following in my footsteps and struggles badly when he's in a situation in which he knows nobody.


The suggestion is to ask people questions. Preferably, ask a question about something you think they care about, will know about etc. If that goes OK, ask them about themselves.


Pretty much everyone likes to talk about themself! Terrible really, but if I could go back in time and tell myself one thing it would be to just ask people questions. It opens conversations. I now do it whenever I'm in that kind of situation. I try to think of multiple questions before starting, so the conversation doesn't die out. Also, obviously, try to choose the person you sense your'e most likely to be able to get on with.


Oh, if I could go back and tell myself anything else on this point, it would probably be: try not to take things so seriously and for goodness sake don't be so antagonistic and sensitive to what others say. But that's a bit of a different matter Confused


I guess one other thing is: look like you enjoy being alone with your thoughts if you can. Nowadays, I notice there are a lot more people who sit back from social interaction than I ever realised when I was your age.


Take care.