Goodlovin23
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- Joined
- Mar 29, 2018
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I’ve been concerned about mental illness for a while now, months maybe more, and I don’t really know how to go about explaining it because there’s so many different things I think about (inward, negative, past encounters, thinking of solution) and everything sort of blends in.
Traumatic experience: My mom and dad got divorced when I was 5(my dad had atleast one scandal). My mom is loving and supportive and my step dad was there shortly after the divorce. I always told my mom I’ve moved on and it doesn’t affect me, I never really vented about it because I didn’t really know my dad and don’t have memorable moments with him.
I guess I’ve always been kind of weird which I didn’t really notice until I started experimenting with psychedelics(shrooms once, LSD twice) and abusing marijuana in high school. LSD didn’t affect me like it affected my friends, it was hard to speak and I wasn’t thinking. My life is vague and feels like I rarely focus on the present. I’ve found it hard to relate socially and I’m known for having a gazing stare and finding it hard to focus in consistently on conversation. Speaking in an emotion point of view is sort of non existent for me. I still live with my family and I’m in my room most of the time and don’t speak to my siblings, we play video games in our separate rooms when we are home. I’ve been to therapy and haven’t been diagnosed with autism or anything.
My family thinks I’m really smart, and I think I’m intelligent, I just feel like there’s something in the way. Some days I think I have a thought disorder, some days it’s possible schizophrenia, other days it’s depression/anxiety, and every other possibility in between. Long story even longer, Ive spent so much time thinking about me that I don’t know how to think presently and I’m ready to go insane at this point, I was outcasted by people in middle school, been told I’ll never meet someone like you, and I can’t wrap my head around it. I feel oblivious and weird and I don’t like it, I want to connect with people, not think about my pitiful self.
Traumatic experience: My mom and dad got divorced when I was 5(my dad had atleast one scandal). My mom is loving and supportive and my step dad was there shortly after the divorce. I always told my mom I’ve moved on and it doesn’t affect me, I never really vented about it because I didn’t really know my dad and don’t have memorable moments with him.
I guess I’ve always been kind of weird which I didn’t really notice until I started experimenting with psychedelics(shrooms once, LSD twice) and abusing marijuana in high school. LSD didn’t affect me like it affected my friends, it was hard to speak and I wasn’t thinking. My life is vague and feels like I rarely focus on the present. I’ve found it hard to relate socially and I’m known for having a gazing stare and finding it hard to focus in consistently on conversation. Speaking in an emotion point of view is sort of non existent for me. I still live with my family and I’m in my room most of the time and don’t speak to my siblings, we play video games in our separate rooms when we are home. I’ve been to therapy and haven’t been diagnosed with autism or anything.
My family thinks I’m really smart, and I think I’m intelligent, I just feel like there’s something in the way. Some days I think I have a thought disorder, some days it’s possible schizophrenia, other days it’s depression/anxiety, and every other possibility in between. Long story even longer, Ive spent so much time thinking about me that I don’t know how to think presently and I’m ready to go insane at this point, I was outcasted by people in middle school, been told I’ll never meet someone like you, and I can’t wrap my head around it. I feel oblivious and weird and I don’t like it, I want to connect with people, not think about my pitiful self.
