Got a Skype date feeling a little nervous

[Toasthead]

I matched with this girl on tinder and turns out for the first time I actually had some what of a connection on that site. Her and I have a lot of the same tastes and interests and she seems really cool. She wants to get to know me better over a Skype call tomorrow and I’m a little anxious. I’m worried I’ll fall head over heels before even really knowing her like some love sick child that thinks every girl that pays him any attention must be his soul mate. On the bright side I’m not having any thoughts of self doubt necessarily. This is probably the most myself I’ve ever been when meeting someone and she actually seems interested so I don’t feel the same kind of negative thoughts like that I’m unattractive or unlikeable. I just feel like if I think things are going to well I’ll go back to my old habits and try to rush things, but I really want to do things differently. If I end up dating this girl I want to take things slow and not get so emotionally invested so soon like my last relationship.

My last relationship barely lasted eight months and when she left it felt like the sort of pain I assume one would feel if his wife walked out on him and took the kids. It was a really awful, unhealthy way of going about relationships and I don’t want to repeat the same mistakes. I don’t just want to love someone for reasons I can’t describe to them. I want to be able to say I’m with someone because I genuinely care about them and not just because I’m lonely. I’ve worked hard this past year to be happy with myself before dating again and I think I really am ready this time. I’m not desperately searching for some impossibly perfect relationship, I’m just opening myself up to new experiences and trying to have a good time not necessarily searching for anything in particular just getting to know people and letting whatever happens happen.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

 

[Cuchculan]

Number 1, this is something new. Don't base it on what has gone before. If we do that we will never be at ease with a new person in our lives. We will always be thinking of the last person. Not everybody is the same. so wipe the slate clean and give this person a fresh start.

Number 2, it is only Skype. Not like standing in front of the person or anything like that. The odds are 50 - 50 for now. Could go either way. Enjoy the Skype chat. See what you make of her. Not what she makes of you. This is a 2 way process. It might remain on Skype for some time. Given what is happening in the world at the moment. No real pressure at all. Just be yourself. Don't try and over impress.

Good luck with it all. Let us all know how you got on.

 

[Siphonophorae]

I would suggest trying to start out as friends. Not trying to start a relationship right off the bat, you are correct that can only make problems. I’ll just use a food comparison: if you don’t want bubbles in your food, take it slow. Also, it’s a good sign you’re preparing for this and you are trying to get ready. You have already thought of a few things that you want to avoid, being proactive, that’s good. Skype is good. If your voice wavers or cracks she might put it down to Skype acting up . And good luck! Hope you guys get to be friends!

 

[Joshua1]

Just be confident in yourself and be relaxed and be yourself.