First timer

[Odd]

So this may sound weird ig but I haven't really suffered from anxiety before. I mean I've been anxious abt things but never like how I am now. I'm not sure how to handle it because I have never had anxiety before and uhm it sucks. It's really messing with me. I just want it to go away so I can go back to being me ig? I've missed school because I'm afraid to go since I'm anxious that I will freak out there or get sick in front of my classmates. I feel like I'll be sick because I have acid reflux and sometimes it can get out of hand and so I felt nauseous all the time every single day but I still went to school because I needed to ya know? Every day was a mental and physical battle for me because I felt like I was sick to my stomach but nothing would happen. So in my mind I'd always think oh I'm going to be sick. Or oh everyone is gonna see me get sick. So with that thought process going over and over again in my head for a month, I feel like I developed some form of really bad anxiety. There's a voice in my head always telling me I'll get sick and it contradicts everything I say. If I say I wanna go to school today, it'll say do you really tho? When you are at home, you're happier and comfortable. And tht really gets to me. So I've been trying to find the will power to go back to school but I can't. And I'm also anxious to eat because to a certain extent something is wrong with me physically so when I eat I either feel good or feel bad and when I feel bad I usually just go and lie down. That isn't the case for when I'm at school so I start to feel trapped at school. I'm afraid to eat, get sick at school, go to school, I feel like I'm trapped at school and I just wanna stay home but the other part of me really wants to go to school. I really do. But I'm terrified. I've been told breathing can help and I've tried it but idk. Ik I have to change my train of thought but it is so so hard. It's like the negative thoughts are easier to slip in rather than the positive and I hate it. I hate feeling this way. I'm really sorry to hear that some of you guys have dealt with anxiety for years and years. That must be really awful. I could really use some advice basically. Which is why I'm here.

 

[hawk101]

Are you able to change to a distance school (often done online or through sending you materials and stuff by post) or homeschooling (a parent assist in your teaching)? I highly recommend both of these options, with homeschool being the most ideal (but sometimes the most difficult, as a lot of parents are out working each day).

I personally only went to mainstream school for a short while, and spent the rest of my schooling time doing homeschooling or distance education (and now I'm at university). It helped considerably, so I really encourage you to look into it and discuss it with your parents.

 

[Odd]

H

 

[Odd]

Are you able to change to a distance school (often done online or through sending you materials and stuff by post) or homeschooling (a parent assist in your teaching)? I highly recommend both of these options, with homeschool being the most ideal (but sometimes the most difficult, as a lot of parents are out working each day).

I personally only went to mainstream school for a short while, and spent the rest of my schooling time doing homeschooling or distance education (and now I'm at university). It helped considerably, so I really encourage you to look into it and discuss it with your parents.

Nah my parents wouldn't allow for me to do that. And I don't want to do that either. It isn't necessarily SCHOOL. It is the negative events that happened to me at school that make me hate it. I have friends and a decent rep to where I don't wanna leave. I just want to find alternatives that can help me cope with my anxiety and go back to school.

 

[hawk101]

Nah my parents wouldn't allow for me to do that. And I don't want to do that either. It isn't necessarily SCHOOL. It is the negative events that happened to me at school that make me hate it. I have friends and a decent rep to where I don't wanna leave. I just want to find alternatives that can help me cope with my anxiety and go back to school.

That's why I recommended distance education or homeschooling - you still get to socialise and have fun with other students if you want to, but you also get the opportunity to work in a much less stressful environment. However, if your parents aren't able to accomodate for this, you will have to do some experimenting at your current school. What are the particular things that worry you the most? Is there a way you can avoid these? Maybe you could even talk to the school about it - I'm sure they'd at least be able to offer suggestions.

 

[Odd]

That's why I recommended distance education or homeschooling - you still get to socialise and have fun with other students if you want to, but you also get the opportunity to work in a much less stressful environment. However, if your parents aren't able to accomodate for this, you will have to do some experimenting at your current school. What are the particular things that worry you the most? Is there a way you can avoid these? Maybe you could even talk to the school about it - I'm sure they'd at least be able to offer suggestions.

Thanks for offering the suggestion tho. I really appreciate it. I'm feeling anxious because I have acid reflux and it has been acting up since the beginning of October and it was really bad to where I felt like I was going to puke at any moment but I didn't know when so I would always think that I'm going to puke but I didn't know when. Thinking that over and over again for a month really drained me to where I started feeling afraid of school because I didn't want to puke or get sick there ig. And so eventually I did puke but not at school. Something is wrong with me physically though. I just don't know what yet. But anxiety wise it keeps me from school. The fear of being sick at school is what keeps me away. I feel safe and comfortable at home. I may go to my guidance office to talk.

 

[scharley1973]

hey odd...what you are going thru is scary and i wish i could take away everyones anxiety or panic, its dabilitating and frightening and usually people dont understannd it ive had this for over 20 years. i never had it in school. i can imagine how hard and difficult it must be. but please, please try to work with counselors, your parents, therapists, anything...but dont do home school i only say that because you miss out on all the memorable and neat things high school or college has to offer. you start hiding yourself away now, itll get worse, much, much worse when your my age. im 46. and your g.i. problems, you said acid reflux can be caused by all of this. i had stomach issues for years..my stomach would bloat like i was 9 months pregnant ive never had kids. they ran sooooo many tests and everything came back normal and they said i had a nervous stomach which was caused by my anxiety im not trying to freak you out but physical symptoms are a big part of anxiety disorder and panic disorder. please talk to someone that could help...we are always here but a professional is best <3

 

[Odd]

hey odd...what you are going thru is scary and i wish i could take away everyones anxiety or panic, its dabilitating and frightening and usually people dont understannd it ive had this for over 20 years. i never had it in school. i can imagine how hard and difficult it must be. but please, please try to work with counselors, your parents, therapists, anything...but dont do home school i only say that because you miss out on all the memorable and neat things high school or college has to offer. you start hiding yourself away now, itll get worse, much, much worse when your my age. im 46. and your g.i. problems, you said acid reflux can be caused by all of this. i had stomach issues for years..my stomach would bloat like i was 9 months pregnant ive never had kids. they ran sooooo many tests and everything came back normal and they said i had a nervous stomach which was caused by my anxiety im not trying to freak you out but physical symptoms are a big part of anxiety disorder and panic disorder. please talk to someone that could help...we are always here but a professional is best <3

Oh wow. I'm very sorry to hear that you've been suffering with anxiety for 20yrs. That is a long time. Yeah my acid reflux really gets in the way of alot of things for me. I have a stomach appt tmmrw so I'll know for sure what is going on hopefully nothing serious. Thank you for your advice and yeah I dont think I'd like homeschooling much because I've always gone to school like away from home and I'd miss my friends too much. My acid reflux has gotten pretty bad to where I almost puke everyday and I lost my appetite to where I didn't eat and I ended up losing 13 pounds in a month. That's been stressing me out alot too.

 

[scharley1973]

Oh wow. I'm very sorry to hear that you've been suffering with anxiety for 20yrs. That is a long time. Yeah my acid reflux really gets in the way of alot of things for me. I have a stomach appt tmmrw so I'll know for sure what is going on hopefully nothing serious. Thank you for your advice and yeah I dont think I'd like homeschooling much because I've always gone to school like away from home and I'd miss my friends too much. My acid reflux has gotten pretty bad to where I almost puke everyday and I lost my appetite to where I didn't eat and I ended up losing 13 pounds in a month. That's been stressing me out alot too.

hang in there!! hopefully your drs. appt. goes well.....im glad you are FOR keep going to school. i know some ppl with this disorder just cant but if u can struggle thru it, try as hard as u can u have a community of ppl here to help you