Finding A Long Term Job Seems Impossible...

[WorkAtHomeGal]

Sorry for the sad sounding title but this is how I really feel. My job history isn't something to be super proud of and has not been long standing. The longest I have held a job was 2+ years twice at 2 different call centers. I refuse to ever work those jobs again though because both times I get severely depressed, ended up on sick leave and full of anxiety and pain. I guess for a while that type of work seemed tolerable but then I just snapped one day... Aside from that I have mostly tried to do only low key jobs. I have worked in a factory before cleaning blueberries before they were packaged but it was seasonal. I also worked at Zellers twice during Christmas rush on night shift stocking shelves but again seasonal so I was laid off. My friend kind of bullied me into working at a corner store which I really regret doing now. I lasted there for a year but kids came in and stole on my shift and I didn't have the courage to stop them, I pretended I didn't see but I did... My store manager cut my hours without discussing it with me first and the people I trained were now in charge while I worked part time a couple days a week.


I felt humiliated after that so left the store to work for my parents in their garden. Housekeeping was okay for a while but the drama was insane and the hours were not good. September 2014 is the last time I had an almost full time career outside the home. That was the last call center I worked at. Once I made enough online to cover my bills I quit that job. Well online went downhill and then I struggled a bit. My parents helped me a great deal during that time but it is embarrassing to need help like that. Feb of this year for less then a month I tried a paper route and liked it even though I was working 2am until the papers were delivered my car broke down to much though and I had to quit. And this week gone by I got hired by a cleaning company but quit after I found it that it wasn't part time like they said but instead was fill in shifts.


So I am back to where I was feeling like a loser, unmotivated, depressed, worthless and so on... I do what I do online but it is not enough. So my question to others with social anxiety what do you do for jobs outside the home? How do you cope? I know I can work so disability is not an option. But anything with heavy customer interaction is to much for me. My town seems to have nothing but fast food and retail jobs so I am worried it could take over a year again until I find something else. My mom mentioned maybe hiring me for the summer again but I don't want them to feel like they have to do this for me. Sadly I only have my grade 12 and am going through a bankruptcy so college is not really an option right now.


Sorry that this post is depressing I am just not sure what to do and it is really getting me down.

 

[pwarbi]

First of all you don't have to apologise for your post sounding depressing WorkAtHomeGal as that is one of the reasons the forum is here, to get things off your chest, talk about things and get the opinions of other people that are in, or have been in your position. When it comes to work and employment, it can make up a huge part of your life, and not just in actual physical hours and days, but also in how you judge and see yourself as a person.


I've worked for 20 years ever since leaving school up until a couple of years ago when I eventually ended up losing my job through ill health. I went through a few personal problems and ended up battling with depression and then the anxiety set in, and being out of work is hard, and you do lose a lot of self respect. In the past I've actually done some volunteer work in local charity shops and that could have led to full time paid employment if I'd have wanted it to, so maybe that's something you could maybe look into? Volunteering for a charity is different than working for a private business as they tend to be more lenient and in some cases are actively looking for people who have certain issues that means that can't fit in to a normal job role. If it's a shop role then there will obviously be face to face contact with other people but they expect you to be nervous and that you may struggle and they'll help you overcome that, unlike in other companies.

 

[hades_leae]

I would recommend you find something out of the area, nothing wrong with travelling. I have had many jobs in my past, and the longest one I had was 11 months and some days. I could never work some where longer than that because they were mostly temporary employment jobs that were supposed to be temp to hire, but I was ripped off. They get you like that.


For your situation, I would consider travelling because you might find something better than all your previous jobs, it's really boring to live in the same community and do the same thing as everyone else by working in restaurants and the other basic jobs that are around.

 

[amy88]

Right now I'm a stay at home parent, so I'm not working outside the home. I'm honestly super nervous about this myself - I had jobs before I had my daughter, but I think in a way this time off not being in paid employment has really impacted how 'sellable' I think I am as an employee. I'm scared to go to interviews again (can anyone say a social anxiety sufferers worst nightmare?) and the idea of getting rejected is also something I am dreading...


Ideally if I could find online work that's probably what I would want to do - but part of me also thinks that's just a way for me to continue feeling trapped in my social anxiety. Almost like I have to push myself OUT of the house and into a job so that it makes me tackle the anxiety head on. Easier said than done though, for sure...

 

[Alex]

I know it's tough, but you want to do this and I can see that it will take time to rebuild your confidence. Maybe you should work for your parents as it will give you some routine and a chance to interact with others. Don't see it as pity, because everyone has to start or restart from somewhere.


I have a degree, and my bother always used to ask when I was going to get a real job. My friend has an MBA and couldn't get a job, and another friend has a brother who has a law degree who is unemployed. Sometimes it's more than qualifications, and the willingness to ask for an opportunity to work.


Perhaps some small internships would help boost your confidence, if they are only a couple of weeks you could juggle online work, but would be a good work reference for the future?

 

[CarlosTL]

There are many career options for people who don't like to being around other people.


You can work at a library or an archive. The pharmaceutical industry has also many option with very little disturbance from colleagues as you'll be locked up all day in a controlled atmosphere doing some tests or checks.


If you go independent, and by all means this is not an impossible feat, you can, among other things: write, translate, design, proof-read, transcribe, video edit.


Just don't surrender to the momentary feeling of being stuck. Keep yourself busy and trying, time will solve many things and you will find a vocation in life. For many people that takes many years, and a majority hate their jobs to a point you can only imagine, so your situation is not out of the ordinary.

 

[WorkAtHomeGal]

pwarbi - I did volunteer at my High school library when I was a teenager and enjoyed it. I need actual money though to pay bills. My boyfriend has been covering everything and I make a little online to cover some of my bills but it is not enough. I need to make more . I may look into it though as it sounds interesting.


hades_leae - Thank you. The farthest I have traveled is an hour from where I live for work. Back then gas was not as costly. I am very willing to do this as long as the hours can pay for my bills and gasoline. As I do have a car. There is a place that is a food processing plant about 40 minutes from here offering seasonal work. I often stay clear of there because they interviewed me twice in the past and I never got hired though I had experience... There is a big workforce there but everyone is working in the factory no customer stuff.


amy88 - I know how you feel. Anytime I was getting employment insurance while laid off from jobs I would look for jobs and it was tough. I am so bad for not shaking hands or making good eye contact. The interviews where I feel like I aced I still don't get hired, it is kind of traumatizing in a way to ones self respect.


Alex - My parents have a garden business so it would be a good job for me even though they live an hour away. Last time I worked for them I stayed at the house and then traveled back here to see my boyfriend every so many days. Yes my confidence does seem shattered sadly so it feels like it could be a long time until it gets better. I don't think my town offers internships unless you are out of college but I could look into it...


CarlosTL - Wow thank you. It helped having you list some job ideas because I really need that too. I know certain things I could do involving not much interaction but other stuff I am unsure of. I do some transcription online and would love to write as I am a writer by heart by have yet to find a calling for that online.

 

[kelden]

Look at your previous jobs as valuable experiences instead of thinking why you can't held on them for more time. Maybe is a good thing that the more time you only stayed working in those jobs was about 2 years. The search for a quality job can take a while and any temporal stuff suits well to cover expenses, don't feel ashamed to try legitimate ways to earn money, Stephen KIng struggled a lot with money when He was a janitor in his former years before becoming a best selling writer. You can think of any idea of profit you like and give a try, as long as you make it an important part of you life (by devoting a considerable amount of time on it) I think you can do it.

 

[John Snort]

It can be hard to find a job offline that doesn't involve interacting with people. Most jobs demand that. Since you've mentioned that you've worked online in the past why not do something that is a combo of working online and offline? Get a mobile app called Gigwalk. You'll earn some cash using the app. Once you register, finding work can be this simple: "Apply for Gigs through the map or Gig List. After being accepted, follow the Gig instructions and submit your work directly in the app."

 

[WorkAtHomeGal]

Kelden - I want to be a writer so I love that you mentioned Stephen King. I think the worst thing though is all my previous jobs, non made me happy. I sort of liked housekeeping but the place I was at for a year had to much drama going on to fully ever like it... Thanks I hope I can do it .


John Snort - This is true, even my temp cleaning job did have people in and out of the gym. No one ever talked to me so I just saw them in passing but even something as small as that was hard for me to deal with for some reason, it scared me a bit. I am trying that actually I would like to keep doing online and something part time offline. I am still looking, it is just taking some time to find something. Way back I did try Gigwalk and no gigs came up for my part of Canada. Maybe I will retry this app then. Thanks.

 

[Wallylee]

You could try working for the UHRS/clickworker. It is a good way to kill time, and if the assessment tests for the UHRS come up after the basic english/writing ones, then I've heard that you can make a decent amount of cash from the website. I'm not sure if that's really for you, but I'd give it a look if you like to try and make money online.


I'm in a similar position as you, I have no job and have never kept one for very long. I have been looking for steady sources of income online for a long time; I've found almost nothing. I have student loans that need to be payed off as well...

 

[WorkAtHomeGal]

I am using Clickworker but don't login to the site enough. I also try my hand at Spare5 and Microworkers too. Thanks. I have not tired their writing assessment I will have to look into that. I had a mass amount of debt as well and ended up declaring bankruptcy. That happened winter 2015. That is adding a lot of added stress too just because it makes me feel bad. On a good note I applied to 4 jobs outside the home today which is pretty big since I am usually pretty slow about it to avoiding it somedays.

 

[DecMikashimota]

Sorry for the sad sounding title but this is how I really feel. My job history isn't something to be super proud of and has not been long standing. The longest I have held a job was 2+ years twice at 2 different call centers. I refuse to ever work those jobs again though because both times I get severely depressed, ended up on sick leave and full of anxiety and pain. I guess for a while that type of work seemed tolerable but then I just snapped one day... Aside from that I have mostly tried to do only low key jobs. I have worked in a factory before cleaning blueberries before they were packaged but it was seasonal. I also worked at Zellers twice during Christmas rush on night shift stocking shelves but again seasonal so I was laid off. My friend kind of bullied me into working at a corner store which I really regret doing now. I lasted there for a year but kids came in and stole on my shift and I didn't have the courage to stop them, I pretended I didn't see but I did... My store manager cut my hours without discussing it with me first and the people I trained were now in charge while I worked part time a couple days a week.
I felt humiliated after that so left the store to work for my parents in their garden. Housekeeping was okay for a while but the drama was insane and the hours were not good. September 2014 is the last time I had an almost full time career outside the home. That was the last call center I worked at. Once I made enough online to cover my bills I quit that job. Well online went downhill and then I struggled a bit. My parents helped me a great deal during that time but it is embarrassing to need help like that. Feb of this year for less then a month I tried a paper route and liked it even though I was working 2am until the papers were delivered my car broke down to much though and I had to quit. And this week gone by I got hired by a cleaning company but quit after I found it that it wasn't part time like they said but instead was fill in shifts.


So I am back to where I was feeling like a loser, unmotivated, depressed, worthless and so on... I do what I do online but it is not enough. So my question to others with social anxiety what do you do for jobs outside the home? How do you cope? I know I can work so disability is not an option. But anything with heavy customer interaction is to much for me. My town seems to have nothing but fast food and retail jobs so I am worried it could take over a year again until I find something else. My mom mentioned maybe hiring me for the summer again but I don't want them to feel like they have to do this for me. Sadly I only have my grade 12 and am going through a bankruptcy so college is not really an option right now.


Sorry that this post is depressing I am just not sure what to do and it is really getting me down.

Sorry to break it to you but the job world is really cut throat. The way that people treat each other is horrible and what makes it worse is it is commendable because anyone that puts business before people is looked on as being successful so long as they make a profit. I don't care what they say, the ends do not justify the means in my book. I have fought to keep a job as well for years now I am just looking for a way to never need a job again.

 

[WorkAtHomeGal]

Sorry to break it to you but the job world is really cut throat. The way that people treat each other is horrible and what makes it worse is it is commendable because anyone that puts business before people is looked on as being successful so long as they make a profit. I don't care what they say, the ends do not justify the means in my book. I have fought to keep a job as well for years now I am just looking for a way to never need a job again.

I know that it is cut throat. I have seen business owners driven by greed over success before and watched them fail it is kind of sad... I wish I didn't need a job either but me acting like that is not going to help my social anxiety. It is a mess not being comfortable and finding a way to push out of a comfort zone...