Fear of not being enough...

[anxiousmomma0814]

Anyone else have this constant fear of never being enough? Like even when you finally find yourself in a good place, you ruin it because your mind won't just shutoff and let you be content?

Specifically, when it comes to relationships? I find myself constantly feeling like I need reassurance, questioning whether the person is actually "in to me" or if I am just a placeholder for them. Questioning whether I am good enough for them, questioning if they can handle my life or if I'm kidding myself.

I'm saying "them" but what I really mean is "him". I have been single 6 years and just finally started dating someone (whom I had talked to every day for 2 years straight before even agreeing to go on a date). Now that I gave into seeing him, i feel all these old worries over-flooding me and it is driving me crazy.

Thanks for any and all advice!
-B.

 

[Cuchculan]

We can try and sabotage good things that happen in our lives. As if we want it, but don't think we are good enough for it. That the other person can do better than us. Have done that before. But you are good enough. Any doubts is just your anxiety. Can you handle a relationship and thoughts like that. What if I have bad days. What will the other person think of me. That is the anxious mind doing the thinking. If he wants a second date, you are good enough for him. Try and enjoy it. Try leave that anxious mind at home. It will only try and ruin things.

 

[Joshua1]

Anyone else have this constant fear of never being enough? Like even when you finally find yourself in a good place, you ruin it because your mind won't just shutoff and let you be content?

It sounds like you have been through a lot of abuse and low self esteem issues. I have been through that myself. It was hard to believe in myself at first but what doesnt kill you makes you stronger.