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Don't know what to do anymore. I'm terrified. Anxiety 24/7.

Rosy

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#81
I remember those days when I woke up with chest pains and serious heart poundings... It was I stop taking celexa. I had a bunch of personal problems along with the torturing mental ones. I also laid in bed crying, read a few pages of a book and burst crying...

I read a book called "Healing from depression" by Douglas Bloch, it helped me cope a bit better. I highly recommend it to you.

Remember, these feelings will pass... Take a good care of yourself, stay away from alcohol, caffeine and too much sugar. Maybe practice meditating. Best of luck to you.
I will try to get that book. And I will take your advice. .I know about the sugar and caffeine. Might try the meditaing. I've had this all my life and I am old now so maybe it upsets me more. Hope you are doing okay. I'm still new typing on this site and I must have touched something. Don't know if this will post.
 

Rosy

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#83
I'm going to try the meditation. And I want to get that book. I'll let you know how the meditation goes. Thanks.
 

AngryLily

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#84
Keep in touch with nature too, I heard it helps with anxiety. Even nature sound tracks can be relaxing. If meditation doesn't work, try writing or drawing.

Also, do you have someone that is close by you where you live? It is also important that you have some social support. Loneliness can trigger anxiety also.
 

Rosy

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#85
Keep in touch with nature too, I heard it helps with anxiety. Even nature sound tracks can be relaxing. If meditation doesn't work, try writing or drawing.

Also, do you have someone that is close by you where you live? It is also important that you have some social support. Loneliness can trigger anxiety also.
Okay I will keep all that in mind. My friend has the nature sound tracks. She likes it. I have nice neighbors so we chat from time to time. My kids have art night once a month where they paint pictures. They are pretty good. Maybe I'll join in and see what I can paint. Thanks for the idea.
 

Butters

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#86
Thank you all for you important and heartfelt replies. It really matters to know that there are people out there rooting for you. AWESOME job going to the grocery store Rosy. Really proud of you. That's a big step.

For me today was a rough one. Had therapy where we did EMDR, I don't think it helped, and then I literally had to force myself to do Uber for five hours and didn't even make that much money.

Now I'm just laying in bed physically and mentally drained.

But thanks to everyone who keeps writing. And keep it up Rosy.
 

Rosy

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#87
Thank you all for you important and heartfelt replies. It really matters to know that there are people out there rooting for you. AWESOME job going to the grocery store Rosy. Really proud of you. That's a big step.

For me today was a rough one. Had therapy where we did EMDR, I don't think it helped, and then I literally had to force myself to do Uber for five hours and didn't even make that much money.

Now I'm just laying in bed physically and mentally drained.

But thanks to everyone who keeps writing. And keep it up Rosy.
Okay, I will. And going to work when you feel like that is a great acheivement. You are getting out there and going to work and that is great. You keep it up too.
 

scharley1973

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#88
i to have had many issues with different anti depressant :( i seriously think ive been almost on all of them. the side effects are worse than my anxiety :( {triceps} chime in here. :) i know you have had a different experience. things work for people in different ways. i do have a wonderful fiance that supports me and my mom too. she has anxiety but she doesnt get panic attacks like me. its hard. very hard...i keep calling the ems to rush me to the hospital :( i think i know its just anxiety and panic but my blood pressure is up and down and i hate to chance it?? its scary. i didnt read all the posts above but just putting my few cents in. thinking of ya! i know how hard it is.
 

Hurt&Hopeful

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#89
Thank you all for you important and heartfelt replies. It really matters to know that there are people out there rooting for you. AWESOME job going to the grocery store Rosy. Really proud of you. That's a big step.

For me today was a rough one. Had therapy where we did EMDR, I don't think it helped, and then I literally had to force myself to do Uber for five hours and didn't even make that much money.

Now I'm just laying in bed physically and mentally drained.

But thanks to everyone who keeps writing. And keep it up Rosy.
@Butters EMDR can take some time. It can also be extremely draining, so it's understandable that you're wiped out. But if you stick with it, you can actually retrain your brain to respond differently to your surroundings and not get so 'stuck' in a panic response. I'm really proud of you for getting out and doing it! We're all rooting for you...
 

VNT89

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#90
Hi VNT. My mornings are, as you describe, ridiculous. I laugh inside at times (couple times out loud) over the degree that my morning anxiety makes me so dysfunctional. I try to have the coffee pot all set up the night before so that I just have to hit the on button to get it brewing. Didn't do that last night and I've been up for three hours, still unable to push myself to tackle that monumentally complicated drip coffee machine. Just ridiculous but I've gotten used to stuff like that.
I'm very fortunate to have a small core of family and one friend who accept me just the way I am. That really helps. But welcome, I hope all of your physical symptoms can be accepted as the ugly side of this anxiety disorder we've been chosen to endure.
hey thanks triceps, appreciate the welcome. sorry for the late reply still trying to get to grips with the site :) . hope you've been keeping up okay.
 

Butters

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#91
I have successfully done Uber for six or of seven days. My driving time average is about six to seven hours. It sucks but I have to pay my bills. And it was nice handing my mother $450 yesterday to pay my car note.

I still get anxiety or residual anxiety but the Valium seems to be helping. Crazy thing is I used to take 10mg of Xanax a day and still have massive panic attacks. Now, I take at most 2 Valium a day.
 

Hurt&Hopeful

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#93
I have successfully done Uber for six or of seven days. My driving time average is about six to seven hours. It sucks but I have to pay my bills. And it was nice handing my mother $450 yesterday to pay my car note.

I still get anxiety or residual anxiety but the Valium seems to be helping. Crazy thing is I used to take 10mg of Xanax a day and still have massive panic attacks. Now, I take at most 2 Valium a day.
This is really great news - I know it's a journey, but it sounds like you are doing much much better than a couple of weeks ago!!! Hang in there!!
 
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#94
What helps me when I'm like that is to let go of all thoughts. This can ironically be scary at first, because thoughts paradoxically give us some security as much as they drive us insane. We sometimes will wait and wait and wait... and wait for a 'good thought' to come but it just isn't happening. So to stop the terrifying thoughts that give us anxiety, the only way to do that is to cease thinking altogether and concentrate something fully on the outside world. Or your own breath. Which is a physical thing, and not 'just in your mind.' So as you do this bad thoughts will keep popping up, but you can keep re-directing your focus. You just keep telling yourself 'I am not this thought. Nor am I this thought' and keep letting go and focusing on something outside of yourself, as much as you can until you feel some stability.

This can drown out the ego enough where you stop identifying so much with it. I'm not a doctor or a specialist, just a guy who has struggled with anxiety and panic attacks his entire life. If it doesn't work for you I'm sorry. But it's something to at least try right.
 

Rosy

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#95
You have the right idea Prismpower, whatever works for you. I like that. Sometimes it works for me . Everybody finds things that work for them and that is good.
 

Rosy

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#96
Butters That is great that you are back to work. You're doing so much better. I am happy things are looking good and the meds are helping. Hurt& Hopeful hope you are good today. I know you still have to be in pain but I'm sure you will push through it. Keep using that ice.
 

triceps

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#97
Butters is bringing home the bacon again. Wow, that was a rough patch you went through. Are you off of the xanax now? You should be so proud of yourself and more importantly, if you start heading in that direction you've proven to yourself that you can beat it.
 

Hurt&Hopeful

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#98
Butters is bringing home the bacon again. Wow, that was a rough patch you went through. Are you off of the xanax now? You should be so proud of yourself and more importantly, if you start heading in that direction you've proven to yourself that you can beat it.
Amen! :) When we go through a really tough time like that, the tendency is to focus on the time we lost, how frustrated we are with the fact it happened...all the negative. But you really have a reason to celebrate right now, @Butters - You may not be where you want to be yet, but a couple of weeks ago you weren't sure how you were going to get through the day. Now you're back working, and in a job that involves both driving and social interaction. That's HUGE. Take some time to pat yourself on the back for getting through it...And once you're on your feet again, you can start looking at treatment options to help yourself stay there. I'm really really happy to see you doing better...I think we were all worried about you!
 

Butters

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#99
Thanks Hurt and Hopeful, really means a lot. I think I may have burned myself out a bit. I Ubered six days straight and each day didn't eat breakfast or lunch. Only dinner. And during the day I would drink two Pepsi Zero's. Today is a rough day I went from taking no Valium to taking three today. I only Ubered for five hours today because the anxiety kept getting worse. I'm laying in bed in a panic thinking I'm going to have a relapse and end up committed again. I'm literally terrified.
 

Rosy

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Hang in there Butters. Just because you have a bad day doesn't mean you are having a relapse. Those pepsi zeros. Are they full of sugar? T.oo much sugar can cause anxiety. It's done it to me. And more so without food. I could be wrong but it is something to think about. Do you think you did too many days without a break? I hope things get better again. I think they will. Give yourself a few days to rest before you try to work again. Maybe someone else out there has better advice.
 
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