Seymour
New Member
- Joined
- Apr 7, 2018
- Messages
- 3
- Reaction score
- 1
Greetings, people. I'm going to try to make this as quick as possible while still giving a bit about myself. I've been diagnosed with GAD, SAD, OCD, selective muteness, PDD-NOS and a few other “minor” problems. My mum died when I was born, so I’ve lived with my maternal grandparents for my entire life. If I could say one thing about both of them, then I’d say that they’ve both been diagnosed with NPD.
It’s never been easy for me, I’ve always had to be the grandson that was the best at everything, which I have never been. I can’t do anything because of my severe anxiety and selective muteness, and my grandparents have never let me forget what a disappointment I am. Needless to say, my grandmum is more overt of a narcissist whereas my granddad is more covert.
I’ve never been physically abused by my grandparents, but I’ve been abused verbally and psychologically. I’ve always felt like how they feel about me is my fault and I still do. They’re the only parents that I’ve ever known. In fact, they’re part of the reason why I’ve always avoided people whenever possible. Luckily it doesn't look like I've developed NPD like both of my grandparents, but I don't see how that's better than not having NPD. I'm left with perpetual self-loathing.
I had a twin sister, she became "ill" a while ago and died about one year ago. My grandparents have "acted" to care, but they don't. She was the only "friend" that I had and have ever had and vice versa. I don't want to risk meeting more people like my grandparents or worse. I wish that I could avoid people altogether. But I know that isn't very realistic, so I want to willingly distance myself from everyone for the rest of my life.
Ever since my twin sister died, I've felt forgotten and I've had to deal with my grandparents without anyone or anything to talk to. And I have nowhere to go to except for the internet. I'm only 15 years old but all of this feels like an eternity. To add to what I "like to do", I've written fiction for most of my life, and it's the only thing that I'm somewhat favourable at. Is it just me or is anyone else in or has anyone else been in a similar situation?
It’s never been easy for me, I’ve always had to be the grandson that was the best at everything, which I have never been. I can’t do anything because of my severe anxiety and selective muteness, and my grandparents have never let me forget what a disappointment I am. Needless to say, my grandmum is more overt of a narcissist whereas my granddad is more covert.
I’ve never been physically abused by my grandparents, but I’ve been abused verbally and psychologically. I’ve always felt like how they feel about me is my fault and I still do. They’re the only parents that I’ve ever known. In fact, they’re part of the reason why I’ve always avoided people whenever possible. Luckily it doesn't look like I've developed NPD like both of my grandparents, but I don't see how that's better than not having NPD. I'm left with perpetual self-loathing.
I had a twin sister, she became "ill" a while ago and died about one year ago. My grandparents have "acted" to care, but they don't. She was the only "friend" that I had and have ever had and vice versa. I don't want to risk meeting more people like my grandparents or worse. I wish that I could avoid people altogether. But I know that isn't very realistic, so I want to willingly distance myself from everyone for the rest of my life.
Ever since my twin sister died, I've felt forgotten and I've had to deal with my grandparents without anyone or anything to talk to. And I have nowhere to go to except for the internet. I'm only 15 years old but all of this feels like an eternity. To add to what I "like to do", I've written fiction for most of my life, and it's the only thing that I'm somewhat favourable at. Is it just me or is anyone else in or has anyone else been in a similar situation?
