Checking and re-checking all the time.

[janemariesayed]

When I lock up at night, I always find that I have to re-check it. I lock the front door, and the porch door then go to the back door to let the dogs in and lock that. But when I walk back past the front door again I have to re-check that I didn't forget to do it.

I tell myself not to be silly and don't bother to re-check it and to trust myself. I don't though and I would never be able to relax until I actually go and check it. I keep checking the door is locked throughout teh day as well. I find that I tell myself 'check, just in case.'

Why do I do this? Why do I have to keep checking if I've done something? Is this to do with my mental illness or is it normal?

 

[Robert Turner]

Nope. No mental abberations here. Most of us do this and as I get older I think if anything it gets worse.

I think it stems from activities we do almost automatically without thought on a daily basis. Your brain has a problem finding a reliable reference point. So it makes you go back and check. if you focus on the activity whilst you are doing it and check it off a list of todo things in your head you will find that helps.

 

[janemariesayed]

Okay, I will try to focus on the activity as I do it. Mixing your idea with one of the crisis teams grounding techniques I will say it out loud as I do it. That way I will force myself to focus on it. 'I am locking the porch door. I am locking the front door etc. It could work! My doctor tells me my memory is bad because of my depression but it would be nice to be able to do something and trust myself afterwards.

Thanks for the idea, @Robert Turner I'm going to try that starting tonight!

 

[Robert Turner]

Just checking up on you to see if your trial worked with the door locking last night @janemariesayed

I find these little ideosynchrasies fascinating . Isn't our brain a wonderfuly wierd thing. I suppose this is very similar to driving along a familiar stretch of road and realizing you've driven a lot further than you thought without realizing it. Autopilot mode.

 

[janemariesayed]

It actually seems to be working! Ever since I have been focusing on it and saying it out loud when I have done something like locking the doors and turning the cooker off for example.

After saying it out loud to myself it has forced my subconscious, I suppose to take it in and then I've been able to trust that the job is done without having to recheck.

My dog Loopyloo is having eye drops at the moment and I am also doing it with administering her drops. Saying out loud to myself and focusing on the job at hand really does seem to sink into my brain and helps me to remember.

Later on when I find myself checking in my mind, 'did I do that?' I find that I am answering myself, 'yes, I did it and I remember doing it too.' So your tip worked!

I do suffer from other memory losses though, but my doctor says because of the life that I have had some things will be amiss and I won't be able to recall things easily like others. He said it was doubtful I would get my memory back to what it should be even with treatment.

 

[Robert Turner]

I have a big smile on my face imagining the routine. Doesn't sound that different to mine. See, we can self repair, its just a lot of small steps that add up to a healthy whole.

You have already embarked on the journey. Way to go. Proud of you.

 

[janemariesayed]

Now I'm feeling really smug! Thanks, and keep the tips coming! Pretty please!

 

[Dragonfly1]

These things that are done in repetition bring reassurance to us. These are simply characteristics of OCD. I don't have issues with making sure that the door is locked, but I have a need for things to be in particular spots. They have to be just right. Example: there are cigarettes, a cell phone, a pen and a lighter on the counter top- they must be in a straight line and in this order: cigarettes, lighter, phone, pen.
I have been trying to let things lie where they are and relax, but no luck yet.

 

[janemariesayed]

These things that are done in repetition bring reassurance to us. These are simply characteristics of OCD. I don't have issues with making sure that the door is locked, but I have a need for things to be in particular spots. They have to be just right. Example: there are cigarettes, a cell phone, a pen and a lighter on the counter top- they must be in a straight line and in this order: cigarettes, lighter, phone, pen.
I have been trying to let things lie where they are and relax, but no luck yet.

Hi @Dragonfly1 I am interested why you feel that way. When you put those items in that order, what is it in your mind that says that they have to stay that way?