Hello everyone!
I’m new to this so hoping for some support. Hope I am posting in the right place.
Almost a year ago, I moved across the country for a new relationship shortly after my divorce (which was a traumatic event in itself) and I am not adjusting very well. I am VERY close with my family and they have a very hard time with me being gone. I usually visit them every month but it is expensive and hurts leaving more and more each time. I have expressed this and tried to come up with a compromise with my boyfriend for months on living in both places and keeping us both happy. It could be done. He is not flexible and tells me what I want to hear so I stick around. My anxiety is the worst it has ever been and he doesn’t really understand it. We do not have the same life goals and I am just really homesick.
I will be driving home next week. It is supposed to just be for a couple months, but I think it might be smart to stay home. I believe that my emotions are keeping me here even though I know it will not be a happy ending and end in resentment. I do not trust my significant other due to things that I discovered when I first moved in with him.
I guess my big question is, how do you deal with situations like this?! I know I am better off moving home but I ALWAYS put other people before me. I don’t want to hurt his feelings. I need to get past this but it hurts and is very difficult. If I don’t deal with this now, I think I will be stuck and settling for a life on someone else’s terms.
Any advice is greatly appreciated!!
I’m new to this so hoping for some support. Hope I am posting in the right place.
Almost a year ago, I moved across the country for a new relationship shortly after my divorce (which was a traumatic event in itself) and I am not adjusting very well. I am VERY close with my family and they have a very hard time with me being gone. I usually visit them every month but it is expensive and hurts leaving more and more each time. I have expressed this and tried to come up with a compromise with my boyfriend for months on living in both places and keeping us both happy. It could be done. He is not flexible and tells me what I want to hear so I stick around. My anxiety is the worst it has ever been and he doesn’t really understand it. We do not have the same life goals and I am just really homesick.
I will be driving home next week. It is supposed to just be for a couple months, but I think it might be smart to stay home. I believe that my emotions are keeping me here even though I know it will not be a happy ending and end in resentment. I do not trust my significant other due to things that I discovered when I first moved in with him.
I guess my big question is, how do you deal with situations like this?! I know I am better off moving home but I ALWAYS put other people before me. I don’t want to hurt his feelings. I need to get past this but it hurts and is very difficult. If I don’t deal with this now, I think I will be stuck and settling for a life on someone else’s terms.
Any advice is greatly appreciated!!
I don’t want to break his heart. I have such bad anxiety when it comes to letting others down.