ALS fear again. Speech

[4bready]

I am 47. This past May I had covid, not bad case. I notice more of foggy head at times and memory not as crisp at times, but not bad. But about 5 days ago I noticed that I felt moments like I wanted to say one word and another one that was similar came out. For example at store I said I would like to play instead of “pay”. Also, I think I am going to say “the kids went to the store" but out of my mouth is “the kids have gone to store”….that freaks me out bc I think I was going to say the first sentence….That is happening to me more the past 5 days. I feel out of it too for periods when this is going on. I feel like my tongue is thick and heavy and that I slur a few words but my wife swears I sound fine. It's almost like its tough for my mouth to say certain words. Periodic throughout the day. I also think of words in my head and almost worry that I will slur or not say them correctly. I feel super anxious during this and almost in panic and like brain fog. This past June I had fear of ALS with foot but that is better.
SO I am freaking out thinking I have early onset dementia, ALS bulbar, or permanent cognitive damage from Covid. I'm feeling very panicky. Sorry guys

 

[Jonathan123]

I am 47. This past May I had covid, not bad case. I notice more of foggy head at times and memory not as crisp at times, but not bad. But about 5 days ago I noticed that I felt moments like I wanted to say one word and another one that was similar came out. For example at store I said I would like to play instead of “pay”. Also, I think I am going to say “the kids went to the store" but out of my mouth is “the kids have gone to store”….that freaks me out bc I think I was going to say the first sentence….That is happening to me more the past 5 days. I feel out of it too for periods when this is going on. I feel like my tongue is thick and heavy and that I slur a few words but my wife swears I sound fine. It's almost like its tough for my mouth to say certain words. Periodic throughout the day. I also think of words in my head and almost worry that I will slur or not say them correctly. I feel super anxious during this and almost in panic and like brain fog. This past June I had fear of ALS with foot but that is better.
SO I am freaking out thinking I have early onset dementia, ALS bulbar, or permanent cognitive damage from Covid. I'm feeling very panicky. Sorry guys

What are you sorry about? Never be sorry on here, it's not necessary. We are here for each other. Your problem is not uncommon in anxiety. It is the product of a tired mind. Your post is perfectly legible and coherent, so there's not much wrong there! When our minds are tired, as happens so often in anxiety, we do tend to slur our words, and slips of the tongue do occur. To my embarrassment I once said sex for sacks! Short term memory loss can also occur. It passes and it's by no means a sign of dementia.
Feeling 'out of it' is another of Mr. Anxiety's little tricks. It's a kind of depersonalisation. It does sound as if you have been Googling. Don't! It's just about the worse thing you can do. If you accept it for what it is it will pass as your mind gets less tired. Try not to add fear to fear by freaking out at every symptom.

 

[4bready]

Thanks for the response. I think I am worried that I am going to slur words more and also it feels like its harder to move mouth at times and like I've become mechanical speaking at certain points. Like a cant get the full word out so I stop and say over. My wife insists I am not slurring. This is so darn frustrating

 

[Fraser]

What are you doing to address your actual issue: health anxiety? Seeking reassurance is not it. You need to be proactive about HA, not ALS.

 

[4bready]

T

What are you doing to address your actual issue: health anxiety? Seeking reassurance is not it. You need to be proactive about HA, not ALS.

I'm in therapy but struggling

 

[Fraser]

T

I'm in therapy but struggling

Good therapist? If so, what would they tell you about your opening post?

 

[4bready]

catastrophizing and seeking reassurance behaviors

 

[Fraser]

catastrophizing and seeking reassurance behaviors

So what strategy are you supposed to enact when you start having catastrophic thoughts and then desire reassurance?

 

[Jonathan123]

So what strategy are you supposed to enact when you start having catastrophic thoughts and then desire reassurance?

Once again we come back to the individual, their attitude to the problem and how strong their desire is to get well. Reassurance is often helpful. To know someone else is suffering in the same way can take the edge off the pain. But so often the relief does not last, and a more direct intervention is required. Acceptance is still a good basic treatment to begin with. After a while it enables us to calm down and see events in the correct way. Catastrophising is the result of an over active mind, and a tired mind.

 

[4bready]

I hear you guys and thanks for commenting. I think I get very triggered with neurological stuff. My dad dies 10 years ago from a terrible neuron disorder (not ALS) but similar so I think that sits in my mind. My wife had cancer 4 years ago at 37 and thankfully is doing well now. I am starting some EMDR work for some trauma stuff.
I think I just lose cognitive discipline when I go into a near issue hole. Right now certain words in a sentence come out sounding odd and my mouth strains so then I go to the rabbit hole. No excuse for my past but its part of my struggle. Hopefully I can make progress.

 

[suzzeeb]

I have felt the exact same way over the past couple years of struggling through major anxiety which turned to depression I guess because of being so exhausted and anxious. Over the last probably 6 months when I read books out loud I mess the words up. I have some memory issues and say the wrong things at times also. I have been pretty freaked out as well but have been trying to realize that with the extent of my sleep deprivation and anxiety for so long that my brain needs time to rest and recuperate. I too feel foggy headed most of the time. It just goes with anxiety, but I do understand the fear that there is something more going on.

 

[4bready]

I appreciate the response. Yeah, I am struggling with articulating some sounds (-ed endings, -sly endings) they feel and sound to me that I am struggling to say them and my mouth is straining so I then I re-scare myself if that makes sense. i'm trying to work through it cognitively. Ugh.