I don't really have a good way to tell when I'm rambling or talking too much vs. when I'm not saying enough or being too shy. I'd like to find a healthy balance somewhere in-between because I'm socially awkward on both ends of the talking spectrum. 
When I first meet people or first go into a social situation I don't really say anything at all, because what usually happens when I open my mouth and talk is that people immediately judge me based on my speech issues. It takes me a really long time to get comfortable. Most people I don't know very well or on an acquaintance basis just think I'm this quiet, shy, skittish person who barely says a word.
But the problem is, once I get comfortable, I never shut up!
I like to tell stories and jokes and once I get started I just keep going and going and going. I'm that guy everyone walks away from at a party lol. Usually when I'm in the middle of telling a story people will get up and say something like "Excuse me, I'm going to go get a drink" and then they never come back and actively avoid me for the rest of the night.
I ask my fiance all the time if I embarrass him, and he always says no, he just thinks I get carried away. He said something along the lines of "You're so used to people mistreating you that when people show you any form of kindness you get too excited and end up wearing out your welcome."
I think that's definitely true to an extent, but the thing is, these aren't people that I trust and would go blabbing my life story to or anything, these are just people that have been a little bit nice to me so I guess I kind of go overboard and assume that they're going to be interested in everything I have to say. I would never like go up to a random person and start telling them something deeply personal or anything like that, but sometimes I want to tell a joke or a funny anecdote and if I see an opportunity, I take it.
I feel like I've already done this on this forum to an extent lol, I just started talking and never stopped and have probably annoyed the crap out of everyone already so I'm sorry if I've done that.
It must be even worse for people who have to deal with me in real life because not only do I never shut up but then there's also the stutter and the speech impediment. I hope no one ever uses my voice for a GPS or anything lol
So I guess the question I'm trying to ask here is something like: How do I know I've gone overboard and said way too much before I've already ruined the social interaction? Like how can I stop myself from scaring the person away?
When I first meet people or first go into a social situation I don't really say anything at all, because what usually happens when I open my mouth and talk is that people immediately judge me based on my speech issues. It takes me a really long time to get comfortable. Most people I don't know very well or on an acquaintance basis just think I'm this quiet, shy, skittish person who barely says a word.
But the problem is, once I get comfortable, I never shut up!
I like to tell stories and jokes and once I get started I just keep going and going and going. I'm that guy everyone walks away from at a party lol.
Usually when I'm in the middle of telling a story people will get up and say something like "Excuse me, I'm going to go get a drink" and then they never come back and actively avoid me for the rest of the night. I ask my fiance all the time if I embarrass him, and he always says no, he just thinks I get carried away. He said something along the lines of "You're so used to people mistreating you that when people show you any form of kindness you get too excited and end up wearing out your welcome."
I think that's definitely true to an extent, but the thing is, these aren't people that I trust and would go blabbing my life story to or anything, these are just people that have been a little bit nice to me so I guess I kind of go overboard and assume that they're going to be interested in everything I have to say. I would never like go up to a random person and start telling them something deeply personal or anything like that, but sometimes I want to tell a joke or a funny anecdote and if I see an opportunity, I take it.
I feel like I've already done this on this forum to an extent lol, I just started talking and never stopped and have probably annoyed the crap out of everyone already so I'm sorry if I've done that.
It must be even worse for people who have to deal with me in real life because not only do I never shut up but then there's also the stutter and the speech impediment. I hope no one ever uses my voice for a GPS or anything lol
So I guess the question I'm trying to ask here is something like: How do I know I've gone overboard and said way too much before I've already ruined the social interaction? Like how can I stop myself from scaring the person away?
