Fear of going blind plus other problems

Hi.

This my first time here. I'm 25 year old guy with severe problems. My childhood was awful. Toxic mother supported by an even worse grandmother. Father left me before my birth. I was also bullied in the primary school. Never had a job. Never had a true friend. In one word - hell! And I need help now from you guys. English is not my native language so be patient with me. Thanks in advance.

First question.

How to stop this fear, this thought that I will go blind? I went to the ophthalmologist five days ago and he said that my eyes are ok but I don't trust him. Something is saying to me that he is wrong, very wrong and that I will lose my sight very soon. This tortures me almost every single day. And this is not all. But let us start with this problem.

Any advice? I am open for everything.

Cuchculan said:

Welcome to the forum. I would ask what reason your ophthalmologist would have to lie to you? What would they stand to gain from lying? The thing is you think you are going blind. So no matter what anybody else tells you, you will want to believe what your mind is telling you. That is the cycle you have to try and break. To trust the experts. They are experts for a reason. They know more than we do. So that is something you can maybe try and work on. Trusting these people. Asking yourself why they would lie to you?

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I know that they are not lying to me but when I get home I get this strange thought that someone put a secret cup of acid somewhere in the house in order to blind me. And after that I have to wash my eyes several times. That takes about 20-40 minutes to do. My eyes are red from all of that washing and they hurt.

Is it possible for an acid to transform in powder form? That is my fear.

MainerMikeBrown said:

Maniac, how many times have you seen this opthalmologist? Do you think he's a competent doctor?

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Yes she is. She is a great doctor.

One more thing. Last night I really hit myself in the eye.

But I am ok now.