Being Myself

Twinkie Moon said:

I'd love to just let loose and stand from the crowd. I've seen so many others do and wear what they want and a lot of the time they're complimented or even have their pictures taken by random strangers out on streets.

But I can't seem to jump the barrier that's preventing me from doing the same.

I want to dress in Victorian style clothing (fitted for modern convenience of course), in vintage clothing, Japanese street fashion, fantasy fashion, have wigs, colored contacts, and blasting metal music without a care in the world.

Instead, I wear the same 3 or 4 pairs of skinny jeans and the baggiest sweaters I can find. I wear the exact same choice of outfit all 4 seasons even if it's 90° outside. The only thing I wear that full of myself are two pairs of shoes. In public my music's volume is lower and I constantly check if others can hear it out of fear of being judged. Before I would outright not play any music that was too "hardcore" no matter how quiet and illogical it was for someone to even hear a bit.

It doesn't help that my mom constantly says how "weird" my tastes are. However, on rarer cases, she'd remember how the outfits and dresses I want to wear are almost the exact same of what her mom (grandma) would sow for her and get nostalgic! That's what I want to do, just bring a little happiness to people just on how I look, and it would help me a ton as well.

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Twinkie Moon said:

Hmm, I feel like baggy sweaters and skinny jeans aren't really my true style mainly because it doesn't give me any confidence and pride. Just feels like I've put on something to quickly get out and come back unnoticed, like going out in public wearing pajamas.

I wore a pretty cute dress during the summer months and I oddly felt like running around with it because of how "liberating" it was. But I haven't worn it since because I just never know when to put it on and feel like I'm going to get judged.

My combat boots are really the only thing thats remotely close to victorian fashion boots(only because both are ankle length and made of leather) and I practically live in them, hehe.

I've really wanted to try more closely inspired victorian clothing but high quality pieces are expensive with a capital E or very hard to find, and I'm always too busy to create my own and my lack of skills won't help matters.

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