What Do You Do To Calm Down When You're Angry Or Very Irritated?

[sidney]

Well I recently have learned some new info and some contradicting info that has made me highly infuriated and it made me angry, and my eyebrows were "meeting" for a prolonged period of time. (Oh no, it causes forehead wrinkles!) I tried to sleep off my irritation, but I woke up still feeling irritated, so I was up for a few hours still feeling irritated, and I tried to sleep again to forget it temporarily. Now morning came and after sleeping twice, I woke up in a better and relaxed frame of mind. But the irritation still remains, since it's still "fresh" info, so as I type this I can't help but feel irritated again. Now my question is, how do you handle this uncomfortable feeling? What do you do to take your mind of the cause of your irritation?

 

[Laneorexorcist]

This is a hard question to answer to, because I think that no matter how much time I gave myself to forget about something that made me angry, I end up thinking about it again or being rude to the person who caused it without even trying, lol. There was actually something that made me really mad last Thursday with a friend of my school, I was kind of rude with him after that but now I feel way more calmed, I guess. But I still don't know how am I going to react when I see him again on Monday. I think that the feeling is going to be there for a while, the only thing that is probably going to change is the intensity of it. 

 

[Aree Wongwanlee]

I have a couple of ways of calming myself. One, I would take a walk or a ride, whichever is more convenient. When I was younger, getting on  my motorcycle and going for a long ride along the country roads was a great way to get back into the proper state of mind. Now that I am older, I find that going for a walk works better. For one, the city I live in now is not too safe for riding motorcycles. The footpaths for pedestrians are still safe.


Another way of calming myself is to eat bread. There's something therapeutic about chewing on bread. The harder the bread, the better. I suppose the sheer effort of chewing works off the tension. When I have finished a loaf of bread, I am normally back to a good state of mind again.

 

[CT422]

What I usually do is remove myself from the situation. I find a quiet area where I can breathe and I stay there for however long it takes to calm me down. Sometimes, I meditate, it's actually incredibly relaxing and therapeutic. 

 

[sidney]

This is a hard question to answer to, because I think that no matter how much time I gave myself to forget about something that made me angry, I end up thinking about it again or being rude to the person who caused it without even trying, lol. There was actually something that made me really mad last Thursday with a friend of my school, I was kind of rude with him after that but now I feel way more calmed, I guess. But I still don't know how am I going to react when I see him again on Monday. I think that the feeling is going to be there for a while, the only thing that is probably going to change is the intensity of it. 

True, good thing time does make the intensity of the feeling less, but I think that it's just simply human nature that we tend to take our anger out on those who are responsible for causing us to feel those emotions. I know I do that as well. If the person that has hurt if angered me is distant, then I think of "alternative ways" to get back at them. 

 

[Alex]

Each of us will handle it in a different way, but the best way is to let it go and think of things you can do something about. I get irritated quite easily so I have to walk away often because it isn't  worth using up mental energy over things I can't  do much about. I can express my opinion, but that's vall.


Right now a company has refused to honor a free gift with all orders made on their customer day, and thousands are fuming. All I can do is post my thoughts and agree with others, but I may take it further out if principle. It's  irritating in that they say sorry, and that's  all and the gift was available until a certain time. It was a badly run promotion that failed and has left people angry. What can you do? People are now asking for refunds, but getting through to the support desk which is backed up is creating more anger.

 

[Choochoo]

I think the best way is to get to the root of the problem. Often times the small things that set us off are not at all that relevant to why we are angry and instead it's because of deep seated issues that we may not be aware of or are not addressing. If you are able to find contentment with your life and who you are then chances of getting annoyed at small things becomes a lot less likely, I think. 

 

[DDNatureLover]

Removing myself from the situation is usually a good idea. What I do after that depends on the situation. I might go for a drive, especially along the water, which I find relaxing. I really enjoy driving the open road where I can drive fast and feel as if I'm running. I will sometimes go to the walking trails and immerse myself in nature, as focusing on other things can totally fill my mind and push out the negativity. On other occasions, I will do some deep breathing, clean the house or do a little yard work. It just depends on how I'm feeling, what the weather is like, and how much time I have. 

 

[sidney]

Each of us will handle it in a different way, but the best way is to let it go and think of things you can do something about. I get irritated quite easily so I have to walk away often because it isn't  worth using up mental energy over things I can't  do much about. I can express my opinion, but that's vall.


Right now a company has refused to honor a free gift with all orders made on their customer day, and thousands are fuming. All I can do is post my thoughts and agree with others, but I may take it further out if principle. It's  irritating in that they say sorry, and that's  all and the gift was available until a certain time. It was a badly run promotion that failed and has left people angry. What can you do? People are now asking for refunds, but getting through to the support desk which is backed up is creating more anger.

True, at least the irritated emotions are subsiding now.  It's a bit annoying that someone suddenly went a whole 180 degrees in their opinion about a certain issue, and the new opinion is clearly a lie, tsk, tsk.


I think it's not the company's fault that their free gift offer was lapped up by numerous customers. I guess the best thing to do at this point is to be patient and wait for the refund.

I think the best way is to get to the root of the problem. Often times the small things that set us off are not at all that relevant to why we are angry and instead it's because of deep seated issues that we may not be aware of or are not addressing. If you are able to find contentment with your life and who you are then chances of getting annoyed at small things becomes a lot less likely, I think. 

Well what I was irritated at is not a small thing, but my dad does get irritated over trivial things, like if you don't "get" something he said the first time he said it, he easily gets irritated and even insults you for not getting it.  Oh well, it's his mood anyway, not mine.

 

[Choochoo]

 Can see how that can get on your nerves. I am curious to know if he knows that he is reacting negatively and causing others to feel bad. I think most of the time when we get irritated with little things and feel that we need to lash out onto others because of it it's because there is something deeper bothering us that we are not addressing. Perhaps there is something your father is uncomfortable with and it is manifesting in this way. I am not a professional though so maybe it is just a habit he has developed or something. 

 

[DylanRowan]

I do what I like. Such as watching tv, play any video game and other stuff. It's my best way of letting it go since it causes some kind of relaxation. Maybe it's the pleasure of things going your way. 

 

[sidney]

 Can see how that can get on your nerves. I am curious to know if he knows that he is reacting negatively and causing others to feel bad. I think most of the time when we get irritated with little things and feel that we need to lash out onto others because of it it's because there is something deeper bothering us that we are not addressing. Perhaps there is something your father is uncomfortable with and it is manifesting in this way. I am not a professional though so maybe it is just a habit he has developed or something. 

I know Gemini's can be quite irritable, he is one so I guess that's part of his nature. He gets grumpy easily, and my friend also noticed that with his Gemini ex bf. I read that they get impatient when people don't "get" things as fast as them.

 

[kelden]

Drink some warm beverage or lay on bed. It always works.

 

[clair02]

I have learned the power of meditation and deep breathing when it comes to controlling my emotions. Whenever I feel myself getting angry, the first thing I do is use a little technique that I learnt from Tony Robbins called 'Transformational Vocabulary'. This entails re-labelling the emotion that you're feeling to make it less intense. For instance, rather than saying "I'm so angry!" You might say, "I'm so annoyed" and that little trick alone will reduce the intensity of your negative emotion. 

 

[John Snort]

One reason I try not to get too angry is because anger brings on a headache. So when I notice that I am getting angry all I have to do is remind myself that being angry will only end up causing me more pain, literally. That's why I always try to deal with the issues that make me angry and when I can't, I have to let them [the issues] go.

I suppose though doing something that distracts you can someone calm down. Write, read, play a video game — anything that takes your mind off whatever it is that is making you angry.

 

[Novelangel]

If the problem involves another person, the irritation will last until you find a way to forgive that person, which is a hard thing to do. Time helps in cases like that, so I suggest removing yourself away from the object of the irritation for a few days until you feel better about the subject. If the problem is not another person, find something to do that you really enjoy, and clear some time out of your schedule to do it. I suggest this because happiness is a great way to overcome or relieve irritation and anger. Any positive distraction can help to get your mind off things that are bothering you.

 

[sidney]

True, unless you can finally forgive that person, the anger will still fester. Sometimes, you don't even have to forgive, just wait for that certain time where the angry feelings have died down. Once it dies down it seems that even if you see that person you won't feel irritated anymore. I remember being irritated by merely seeing that person's pic on FB! Then eventually not anymore.

 

[amy88]

A lot of the time when I'm super angry or irritated, the answer is getting away from the situation that's making me angry - so if I go for a walk or run, that helps - plus it gets those endorphins pumping which helps me feel better too.


Sometimes calming down might be reading a book, or listening to music - sometimes it might be calling someone I trust and venting to them. I guess it depends on the root cause of what's making me angry or irritated as to what's the best solution for me.

 

[janemariesayed]

I'm amazed that you managed to sleep at all while feeling so agitated. Sleep always escapes me when I feel like that. What I do is take some deep breaths and tell myself to calm down. Things do stay in my mind for a while afterwards, though. Sometimes, when I have recognised that I am still angry about something, I tell myself 'Sshhhh!' whenever the thoughts come to mind.

 

[ptahm22]

In most occasions I fly off the handle and lose control but sometimes I'm able to manage. I say the words "Calm Down" repeatedly when taking deep breaths until I feel my pulse has stabilized.