Triggers

[PNWlove]

New member here! How do y'all handle triggers? I currently find myself avoiding some things that I'm sure others find odd. They all have to do with mistakes I've made in the past -- things, places, etc. that remind me of those mistakes. I can face them but it's not pleasant and doesn't seem to ease my anxiety the next round. Any help, insight, etc. would be greatly appreciated!

Just so you have an idea. Some of the things are: weddings, bars, Disneyland, job interviews, and babies.

 

[Concernedgal]

Hi PNWlove welcome. So let me ask you? What kind of mistakes where made during these situations? My situation is being in a car, if i'm in a car for longer than 15 minutes I have a full blown panic attack. So I know what your going through to an extent. But, from the information I have right now I would say that you suffer from self esteem issues and insecurities. (Welcome to the club lol) anyway, or you could have a touch of agoraphobia. You may think of an agoraphobic as a person that's locks themselves in there houses and never comes out although , they do exist.. that's not always the case. If your not allergic to benadryl. .. I would try that too . It's like the otc version of an anti anxiety medication. But, if you do take a prescription anti anxiety medication. ... I would not recommend benadryl. I would really have to know a little more about your situation to provide you with better advice.

 

[janemariesayed]

Hello @PNWlove and welcome to this forum. You are definitely in the right place for understanding and caring.

It sounds to me that you are not forgiving yourself for your past mistakes. whatever they happened to be, I think you need to forgive yourself to be able to move on. The fact that you seem to feel so very guilty says that you are repentant and so deserve forgiveness. Forgiveness isn't agreeing with the bad deed. Forgiveness is moving on and not thinking about it any more. It also seems that the situation has made you agoraphobic as you are having problems with places where there are people gathered or stressful situations.

Mistakes are allowed. We are allowed to make mistakes. Maybe your mistakes are not such huge bad deeds, but situations that you found yourself in and got wrapped up in. These are not mistakes at all. Therapy could help you. Talking about it with a professional will help you to release your fears and hopefully overcome them. Or, you could see your Doctor and talk to him about the best medical remedy available.

I looked up agoraphobia on the net this morning, and I found that agoraphobia is a symptom of Panic Disorder. It seems that in your case this is due to events that you are considering to be a mistake. But it has had an adverse effect on you.

A few years ago I spent a bit of time thinking about all the mistakes that I had made throughout my life. Everything I could remember and more came to mind as well. I said sorry for all the things that I remembered that I had done wrong. I ended up crying my heart out for days because I felt so sorry for things that I had done that were wrong. My mistakes that had hurt others maybe. I even found myself saying sorry for anything I may have done wrong in past lives, if there is such a thing as past lives! But I found that releasing apologies out into the universe did help me to forgive myself. Mistakes I have made are not solely down to me. Others have harmed me, or hurt me which as made me do things that I regret. So I consider, I forgive myself because had I not have had some things happen in my life then it's possible that I wouldn't have done those things in the first place.

If you don't feel ready to talk to a doctor or shrink, then you could get some over the counter natural remedies that may help you. I have a problem with taking chemical drugs so I take St. Johns Wort and Ginkgo Biloba. They both lift the mood and help a little with anxiety. Really, I think that you need talking therapy. I think you need to hear from someone that you have not done anything wrong and you are not to blame. Even if you do think that you were in the wrong, ie: your mistake, then you will probably find with counseling that you were not really to blame at all, or at least you will be able to get professional help in compartmentalizing the events that brought on this anxiety.

Good luck and please let us know how you get on?