Help! I've Been Invited To A Wedding!

Discussion in 'Social Anxiety Disorder' started by janemariesayed, Jan 9, 2017.

  1. janemariesayed

    janemariesayed Junior Member

    Advice needed, please!

    I have been invited to a wedding in a couple of months and I suffer from social anxiety in a big way. I know the groom well enough, and his wife to be a little. They are both wonderful people and I'm really touched to have been invited.

    His sisters also work in our local shop and they are also very nice people who I see when I go into the shop. I know the groom's mum as well and she lives very close to me.

    But although I know these people, it's only the groom that I actually have sat down and chatted with on numerous occasions. I am scared stiff that I need to walk into a party and not really know anyone. How do I strike up conversations all evening with strangers? :arghh: OMG! What do I do?
  2. Alex

    Alex Senior Member

    Can you take a plus one? If not, ask if there is anyone else you know on your table. Weddings are quite nerve racking, and I'm not a fan of them either.

    I think the best thing to do is just be yourself and be a good listener. The question people always ask is which side do you know, and then conversation can stem from that.
    janemariesayed likes this.
  3. janemariesayed

    janemariesayed Junior Member

    Thanks @Alex. Well a couple of friends were supposed to be going as well as me and I would have gone along with them. It doesn't look like my friends will be going now so I would have to go by myself. I don't think it's a sit down evening, as it's just the reception that I've been invited to but the thought still scares me.

    This darned anxiety makes me feel so shy! :nailbiting:
  4. Alex

    Alex Senior Member

    A lot can change! I know I backed out of a posh wedding in a castle that cost my friend a fortune, and I lied and said I had to work. The thought of going there and not knowing anyone (it was miles away in Leeds) was too much, as well as the pressure of a posh wedding. I felt bad, but the anxiety of going was worse.

    If it's local it's not too bad as you can go home or arrange a cab back. If it all gets too much, you can say you have a headache and leave, but don't worry too much, because weddings are events where people know there will be strangers. Watch Four Weddings and Funeral and you'll be fine!
    janemariesayed likes this.
  5. janemariesayed

    janemariesayed Junior Member

    Ha ha ha, @Alex I think I will definitely take your advice and watch Four Weddings and a Funeral! :joyful: It's just that, you know those people who are always left sitting at the table on their own? I have a big fear that that will be me! Even if it wouldn't be, I fear it. Then going up and talking to complete strangers and not really knowing what to say.

    I think if I were to go, I would not stay very long as I feel stupid and embarrassed going on my own. It may end up that I make an excuse and not go altogether unless I can get my head round it before hand. I will still get them a gift and if I don't go, I can always give it to them afterward. I wonder if giving them a gift will earn their forgiveness for not going to their reception, or is that a bad attitude for me to have?

    That wedding looked like fun, being in a posh castle! I love castles but would still have been very shy to go by myself.

    If I do decide to go I will try to remember to ask which side do they know and see how the evening pans out. :arghh: Not looking forward to it though!

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