Help! I've Been Invited To A Wedding!

Discussion in 'Social Anxiety Disorder' started by janemariesayed, Jan 9, 2017.

  1. janemariesayed

    janemariesayed Junior Member

    Advice needed, please!

    I have been invited to a wedding in a couple of months and I suffer from social anxiety in a big way. I know the groom well enough, and his wife to be a little. They are both wonderful people and I'm really touched to have been invited.

    His sisters also work in our local shop and they are also very nice people who I see when I go into the shop. I know the groom's mum as well and she lives very close to me.

    But although I know these people, it's only the groom that I actually have sat down and chatted with on numerous occasions. I am scared stiff that I need to walk into a party and not really know anyone. How do I strike up conversations all evening with strangers? :arghh: OMG! What do I do?
     
  2. Alex

    Alex Senior Member

    Can you take a plus one? If not, ask if there is anyone else you know on your table. Weddings are quite nerve racking, and I'm not a fan of them either.

    I think the best thing to do is just be yourself and be a good listener. The question people always ask is which side do you know, and then conversation can stem from that.
     
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  3. janemariesayed

    janemariesayed Junior Member

    Thanks @Alex. Well a couple of friends were supposed to be going as well as me and I would have gone along with them. It doesn't look like my friends will be going now so I would have to go by myself. I don't think it's a sit down evening, as it's just the reception that I've been invited to but the thought still scares me.

    This darned anxiety makes me feel so shy! :nailbiting:
     
  4. Alex

    Alex Senior Member

    A lot can change! I know I backed out of a posh wedding in a castle that cost my friend a fortune, and I lied and said I had to work. The thought of going there and not knowing anyone (it was miles away in Leeds) was too much, as well as the pressure of a posh wedding. I felt bad, but the anxiety of going was worse.

    If it's local it's not too bad as you can go home or arrange a cab back. If it all gets too much, you can say you have a headache and leave, but don't worry too much, because weddings are events where people know there will be strangers. Watch Four Weddings and Funeral and you'll be fine!
     
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  5. janemariesayed

    janemariesayed Junior Member

    Ha ha ha, @Alex I think I will definitely take your advice and watch Four Weddings and a Funeral! :joyful: It's just that, you know those people who are always left sitting at the table on their own? I have a big fear that that will be me! Even if it wouldn't be, I fear it. Then going up and talking to complete strangers and not really knowing what to say.

    I think if I were to go, I would not stay very long as I feel stupid and embarrassed going on my own. It may end up that I make an excuse and not go altogether unless I can get my head round it before hand. I will still get them a gift and if I don't go, I can always give it to them afterward. I wonder if giving them a gift will earn their forgiveness for not going to their reception, or is that a bad attitude for me to have?

    That wedding looked like fun, being in a posh castle! I love castles but would still have been very shy to go by myself.

    If I do decide to go I will try to remember to ask which side do they know and see how the evening pans out. :arghh: Not looking forward to it though!
     

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