Closed postures

[Claraviolet]

I don't know why but I always end up in one of the closed postures when I am outside. I have tried my very best to overcome that but so far, I haven't succeeded. I always hunch my shoulders a bit, even though I am short, and I am always fold my hands, when I am waiting for something. Also, I always end up twining my hands together, when I am sitting in public.

My whole demeanor speaks, "keep away". Anybody else experience similar stuff? If so, how do you deal with it?

 

[Zeesi]

Maybe it's just me, but I think that having a closed-off posture is kind of a good thing in this day and age. Why are you trying to overcome it? Are you trying to meet more and more people in general, or trying to attract a mate? (Sorry if I'm being too nosy.)

I tend to come across as way too friendly with certain people which is okay sometimes, but other times it can be irksome, especially when they start acting like they know me, even though they've only just met me 1 minute ago.

Maybe if you want to not seem so closed off, you could just start a conversation with people when you are outside. You say you've tried to overcome the closed posture, but haven't been able to do it, so maybe stop focusing on trying to change the posture and change something else, and just start talking to people.

 

[Natasha0717]

I do know what you mean. And you're right, you are subconsciously telling the world to "keep away." (I study body language a lot, even took a class on it-one of my favorite hobbies.)

My problem is more my posture involving my shoulders. I think I'm just so darn tense at times, that my shoulders are always held up too high, like I'm constantly shrugging my shoulders. I have to make a conscious effort to "release" my shoulders back down to their normal position.

So that's how I deal with it. If I catch myself in a store window of something and see the reflection of me and my shoulders too high, I just bring 'em on down.

 

[Kaynil]

I can be like that as well. When I am standing up by myself I naturally tend to cross my arms. The best way to combat closed postures is to observe yourself how you act around your close friends and people when you're relaxed.Also being informed what are some postures that bring a more open demeanour is good.

For me, folding my arms together is how I relax, so if you are too used your hands like that, just try to find poses that compliment that. Your hands don't have to be separated, just make sure they are not tight. For me is usually making sure my back is at least straight or leaning back. I like opening my legs a bit. If you're wearing a dress you could just loosely cross your ankles.

In the end being too self-conscious of it might work against you so don't think much about whether you're doing alright just try instead to find relaxing thoughts, breath slowly or find a way to naturally relax you and your body will show even if it not what you read or been told it should do. We all have our own way.