Another Invitation

[DDNatureLover]

I got another invitation to an event, this time a Christmas gathering. Some of the people will be the same as were at the baby shower that I didn't attend. Since it's a Christmas gathering, I can easily bake a dessert to bring, so I don't have to worry about buying an expensive gift. I also don't have the added pressure of pretending I'm happy about an event I'm concerned about (a baby to an unstable couple both with drug histories), which helps with my anxiety. I said I'd attend. I can always back out at the last minute, but I don't want to, at least for now.

Have you received invitations to Christmas/holiday parties? Are you planning to attend? How do you feel about the events/invitations?

 

[to7update]

Actually my Christmas is spend with my in-laws this year, so it's something that happens every year. As for parties, not exactly, but we do have a Christmas lunch an a Christmas dinner with colleagues from work that is ok.

I think it's great that you attend @DDNatureLover, do you know if the people going are people you get along with well?

 

[Alex]

I'm happy you @DDNatureLover have another chance to go, and Christmas is a little easier as people always talk about the weather, stores, music and festive talk. These days I don't do much, but I have a sick neighbor and I was with her when she ordered her meals on wheels and, she ordered a Christmas Dinner. I asked my parents if we could invite her over as an option, as no one should be home alone with a tv dinner unless it's a choice.

 

[DDNatureLover]

I know who some of the people will be @to7update. I've spent a few holidays with some of them in the past, and others will be neighbors, which is a mixed bag. There aren't any I don't get along with, but some aren't necessarily people I'd choose to hang out with individually, although hopefully the crowd will provide a nice buffer. I've declined a lot of invitations, especially those right on the dates of the holidays, because I prefer to be either alone or with people I'm closer to, but since this is scheduled for earlier in the season, I'm sort of looking forward to it.

@Alex Is that the neighbor you got the microwave for? It will be nice if she still gets her meals on wheels dinner, so she can celebrate twice, even if she does have dinner with y'all. I've always been one to invite others to dinner, but unfortunately, I'm not in the situation for that right now. I do agree that eating alone should be a choice, and I'm glad you pointed that out. There are a lot of people who act as if it's horrible to have dinner alone or spend a holiday alone, but there are many people who prefer it that way. I am always invited to at least one place, but I often turn the invitations down, because I prefer to be with those I'm close to, or alone, especially on the holidays themselves. Either way, I'm sure your neighbor will appreciate the invitation, that was nice of you to ask her.

 

[Alex]

@DDNatureLover , it's the same neighbor, and she only has cousins left. I personally have chosen to spend many Christmases alone, and that was my choice even though I had offers. I just like peace and quiet at times and only want to be with people I really want to be with. I spent a couple of Christmases with an ex and it really wasn't that much fun, and one of my better ones was helping at the homeless shelter.

Christmas is just another day to me as I have worked on that day before, and also the following day, so it lost any meaning sadly. Maybe one day it will hold more for me, but right now I see it as a day to do what I like with no pressure. In terms of my neighbor, she is very ill, and may not make it to Christmas, so I hope she does and we can make it a memorable one for her.

 

[to7update]

I know who some of the people will be @to7update. I've spent a few holidays with some of them in the past, and others will be neighbors, which is a mixed bag. There aren't any I don't get along with, but some aren't necessarily people I'd choose to hang out with individually, although hopefully the crowd will provide a nice buffer. I've declined a lot of invitations, especially those right on the dates of the holidays, because I prefer to be either alone or with people I'm closer to, but since this is scheduled for earlier in the season, I'm sort of looking forward to it.

@Alex Is that the neighbor you got the microwave for? It will be nice if she still gets her meals on wheels dinner, so she can celebrate twice, even if she does have dinner with y'all. I've always been one to invite others to dinner, but unfortunately, I'm not in the situation for that right now. I do agree that eating alone should be a choice, and I'm glad you pointed that out. There are a lot of people who act as if it's horrible to have dinner alone or spend a holiday alone, but there are many people who prefer it that way. I am always invited to at least one place, but I often turn the invitations down, because I prefer to be with those I'm close to, or alone, especially on the holidays themselves. Either way, I'm sure your neighbor will appreciate the invitation, that was nice of you to ask her.

I know that feeling as sometimes I am involved in events of the same nature. For example, my wife wanted us to go the the Christmas dinner from my company and there are some colleagues I get along with fine, but others that I would prefer to avoid. At the same time my boss is going too, so there is this special stress because of it. Sometimes I just feel those events are over as I cannot really enjoy them.

 

[Natasha0717]

I got another invitation to an event, this time a Christmas gathering. Some of the people will be the same as were at the baby shower that I didn't attend. Since it's a Christmas gathering, I can easily bake a dessert to bring, so I don't have to worry about buying an expensive gift. I also don't have the added pressure of pretending I'm happy about an event I'm concerned about (a baby to an unstable couple both with drug histories), which helps with my anxiety. I said I'd attend. I can always back out at the last minute, but I don't want to, at least for now.

Have you received invitations to Christmas/holiday parties? Are you planning to attend? How do you feel about the events/invitations?

I have always dreaded seeing an invitation sent to me in the mail. And then when I see that my parents have also received an invite, in the same, similar envelope...I always know danger is ahead.

I will list the events that I truly wish I could avoid altogether, in the order in which I dislike them. I don't dislike the people, don't get me wrong. It's just the event itself.

Okay, starting with the worst:
1.) Weddings
2.) Wedding Rehearsals - (where you get to practice all the scary things you will need to do the next day, esp. if you are standing up in the wedding.)
2.) Baby/Wedding Showers (always seem to be in bright, well-lit restaurants or halls, sometimes even open-windowed where you feel as if you are on stage.)
3.) Bachelorette Parties
4.) Wedding-prep parties - where you have to make all the stupid kleenex-flowers, table gifts, etc.
5.) Birthday Parties in huge restaurants
6.) Holiday Parties (these aren't too bad, I can just make an appearance and then take off. Nobody really notices too much.)

The events aren't really what scare me so much. It's more the worry of not being able to sleep the night before. I have the kind of mind that seems to enjoy making me stay up all night before huge events, just so I will feel even more terrible and nervous while I attend the party. Why? I don't know exactly. Perhaps it's just an evil mind.

 

[Alexandoy]

I have received several invitations for the Christmas party of different groups in the local movie industry. If you still do not know, I was unceremoniously removed from my position in our organization (due to jealousy). My wife is asking me if I would attend any of those invites and I hastily replied a loud NO. I have lost my appetite for parties in that particular industry maybe because of my sad experience. But in fairness to those invitations, most of them are my friends. Another thing that holds me from going is the thought of contribution. I always bring something to the party whether food or gifts or even prizes in the games and raffles. Now I can save a lot of money for that.

 

[to7update]

I am sorry to hear about that situation @Alexandoy, but even if you were removed from your position, if in those parties most of the people there are your friends, why don't you attend? Business is always cold, so they don't really care what we have done in the past, but I always follow my way and try to understand if I want to isolate myself or participate in the events where the people I care about are.

 

[fuzyon]

I have been invited to a family Christmas party which I'm pretty reluctant to go to. Not because I'm not on good terms with my family or anything, but I'd much rather spend the Christmas night with my SO sharing gifts and cuddling together. I think I'll have to deny the invitation, my girlfriend is also not keen on going.

 

[to7update]

I think those are the decisions we need to make based on what will make us feel better or not and there you have a great example @fuzyon. I don't think we should feel obligated to go just because someone invited us.

Look at my example, usually we spend Christmas at the big house of relatives. Usually we are almost 30 people there and it's OK, but this year prefer to spend it just ourselves. I think there will be no problems with that, but at the same time declining that invitation might mean that next year the invitation will not come.

 

[Kaynil]

Not really invited to go anywhere so far for which I am mostly glad. I am always nervous about what to bring. They always joke that I should bring a Mexican dish but my friends gathering always tend to be the food-included kind.I am not really expecting to be invited either, not even at work. We were already told in the meeting they would hold to the money and wait after next year when the lease and renovations are out of the way.

@DDNatureLover I am happy you got invited to an event that doesn't bring you the stress that the past invitation did. I hope you have a very nice time.

 

[Zeesi]

Well, every good party requires some nice party attire, and I'm waaaay too fat these days, so finding that elusive, comfortable pair of high heels to accompany the nice party clothes, poses a challenge for me.

Other than the 'high-heels challenges', I think that if one is going to go out, the Christmas season is the best time to go out and enjoy the festivities.
Everyone, for the most part, tends to be in a better mood than they are at other times. I've been invited to a couple of events, but honestly, I mostly just want to relax at home, and do my own thing.

I love the whole holiday vibe--love it-- so therefore I sometimes love being out and about, but these days, going to specific parties and events, not so much.

I can be a social butterfly, especially if I'm having an especially frenzied time of things that particular day, but at other times I want to be a wallflower. I don't want to interact with anyone, talk to anyone; I just want to be at the party, but not of the party. In those particular cases, I might as well stay home. When I'm at home,
I don't have to deal with being a certain kind of way.