Anger problems

janemariesayed · Mar 17, 2017

XmasCarol52 said:
This is really starting to bother me,my yelling has been out of control in these past two weeks,I am so afraid they will evict me but I don't think they can because is part of my illness which is something they just do not get.Every little thing makes me nervous lately and I lose control I have tried hard not to yell but I cannot ..I tried singing working on stuff nothing seems to help then on top of that I also get shaky then I start to cry because I am wondering why and what is happening to me ,I feel like I am going crazy.I know it is because of the bipolar and mood swings but I just don't know how to stop it.I am afraid all of the time.I wish I couldn't eat maybe that will help me lose weight heaven knows I lost my mind lol.

Bless you, @XmasCarol52 you have not lost your mind at all! Whatever is the reason for your illness, that is what it is. You are not well and so how can that be your fault. The fact that your illness affects your mood isn't your fault either and yet when you have an outburst, you are still quite within your mind. If you were not in your right mind then you probably wouldn't remember it. Then, you wouldn't feel bad about it because you wouldn't remember it. I know it is easier said than done, but try to not worry about it. Don't care what they may or may not think of you. Sending you hugs.

janemariesayed · Mar 18, 2017

XmasCarol52 said:
Thank you,you are so sweet,I had a few more outburst again today matter of fact my meals on wheels lady caught me however she gets my illness she understands but does'nt get why we feel this way.As i have told her I only wish that I knew all i know is that it is a chemical imbalance in the brain ,what brain lol. Anyway when I asked her if she could hear me yelling outside she said no not until she opened the door she said my name i think she was trying to get me to snap out of it she did for a few seconds,let me tell you what has been going on outlook.com my email keeps blocking me from getting into my email and i need some kind of email i justt changed it yesterday then again this morning the same old crap i signed up again with them only to find out when i had to sign in they kept on giving me this crap my password was wrong,another dumb email told me my phone number wasn't valid i think I know my own phone number,then I couldn't open any web pages because sometimes google messes up and it takes me almost ten minutes to get back on my pc.Then I went and told everyone my new email yesterday only to tell me it is being blocked i had to tell about five people my new addy now i cannot use that this way to much for me to handle.Maybe for some people that wouldn't bother but for me it does.Maybe that is because I am not normal.IN any case thanks for the hugs right back at you,believe me I could certainly use those hugs because the last 2 weeks have been pure hell for me. Right now I am crying.I feel like I am a bad person because of my mental illness.I sound like I have a demon inside of me when I am yelling it doesnt even sound like me,even my friend told me that,I couldn't hurt anyone they just better not say a word to me about it again,now a coupleof pix i drew today i have to do somethingView attachment 214 View attachment 215 View attachment 216 View attachment 217 View attachment 219

It is really hard to put ourselves completely in another persons shoes. Having compassion and total confidence doesn't usually go hand in hand. When we are feeling okay, we are on top of the world and don't think about what others are going through. Even if two people suffer the same problem, they can end up with totally different symptoms.

Don't think of yourself as a bad person. You are not at fault because you are not well. At least you understand why you behave the way you do. Telling people has or at least should make them realise that your reactions are not meant in a bad way. If they have any kind of understanding in them at all I am sure they would be gentle with you.

Sorry about the problems you had with your email. Things like that can happen to the best of us but for us, with our mental state, it is much harder to deal with. So, yes! Those hugs are for you and whenever you need them.

Concernedgal · Mar 19, 2017

Look what i found. Your a good person. The injustice is the mental health system . They should be able to do better for us.

janemariesayed · Mar 19, 2017

I am wondering @Concernedgal @XmasCarol52 as you both suffer from Bipolar if there is an actual trigger to your angry phases. Do you feel them coming on? Is there a particular trigger that sets off the anger phase or is it something that comes out of the blue? I am wondering if either of you can identify if there is a trigger that brings it on?

Thankfully Bipolar isn't something that I can add to my own problems. Of course, there are times when I am happy, and other times not. The last time dI was going through a 'non-controllable angry phase' was a year ago last Christmas when my 11 year old dog died. I just seemed to get really irritable and lose my rag with anything and everything. Even up to a few months later. This was normal anger I think, that anyone can have. Of course, this is a lot different from the anger that you guys are suffering. Is it the same in the sense that it isn't controllable, like it was for me after my dog died?

Concernedgal · Mar 19, 2017

For me the anger is pretty basic. Like @XmasCarol52 mentioned, it starts out as a simple little thing that goes wrong then you are just annoyed and ticked about every little thing. The triggers can be as innocent as asking a simple question . I suppose I am just angry at life and anything or anybody that wants to dare put more stress on me.. is definitely in for it.

Concernedgal · Mar 21, 2017

It's not funny. You just want to point at them and yell" what makes you so perfect bitch?They don't understand that we were born with an inadequate supply of sarotonin in our brain"sorry, seen my doctor recently " lol. Anyway. People shun and belittle us and there's no reason for it. I mean how would you feel? How would you feel if you had to live and deal with what we have to deal with everyday? Can I laugh at you too? Wait till that bitch has her own panic attack of her own.. just wait. Laughing at you... I still can't believe that crap . I hate people like that. It's disrespectful and disgraceful. That pisses me off. I'm so sorry, you didn't deserve that . None of us deserve that. Because i've been in similar situations in my life . I just want to punch them but, I restrain myself . Stay strong . And know that I am here for you if you need to talk.

Holly_Natanya · Mar 21, 2017

So sorry you're going through that! Big hug and best wishes!! I agree with posts above that it's not your fault!

Hope you have good friends around you to tell you what's great about you.

Holly_Natanya · Mar 21, 2017

One awesome friend can make a giant difference! I bet if you just explain it to her that same way, that you don't know why, she'll care. There aren't answers to everything in life, so caring for one another seems to me to be the most important thing. Hope you have an awesome Tuesday XmasCarol52! Feel free to message any time.

janemariesayed · Mar 22, 2017

I've noticed that I've been getting a bit angry lately. I think it's because of my upcoming therapy assessment on Thursday. I've been really snappy at everyone, even shop assistants. It may be time to stay home for a while so I don't embarrass myself.

Anger problems

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